Hi, i'm gonna slowly share bits and pieces of my lifestory in different places. Sharing it helps me feel less alone. I'm not sharing everything ofc- just the parts that i feel okay to talk about right now.

When i was young, i would compare myself to someone who had pretty privilege. Then as i grew older, i became fixated on my appearance. I became so stress about the way i look to the point where i would loose weight. Eventually, i had reached out to a therapist, and for the first time, i felt seen and understood.

I began showing her this video;

• A healthier alternative to comparison-based self esteem

Then we started talking about shifting from comparison to compassion. And it sounded something like: "It hurts that she gets more attention— but that doesn’t mean I’m ugly. I’m proud of how i showed up for myself today. I drank water, did skincare, went for a run, took a shower- i showed up for myself today. I am amazing"

And she told me that when i say: "I'm proud that I showed up for myself today. I drank water, I showered, did skincare etc…" I'm rooting my self-esteem in my actions, care, and effort. And this is compassion-based.

Also, another thing that helped me was to remind myself that comparing myself to others is what my old self would do. I'm not her anymore. The present me doesn't recognize her.