- the pulsating thoughts of the future and college and why i'm stuck in this position, and how most importantly did i manage to get myself here- i myself put myself here. and all this time i thought i was the one who was in control, i was the one who was leading myself, when really i'm just following myself and waiting for something to happen because i could never imagine myself in a situation where i would have no direction if i was with myself because i always trusted myself to push through and find a way and when i can't find a way i feel as though i have failed.
- her eyes and her hair the way it falls on her face and the way it curls and it's sweet color and her sweetness and her ethereal eyes and the way she thinks of me which will never be what i need and not close to what i want but she is everything i have - so she has become everything i need though i feel i have nothing
- being alive has caused me to ache so strongly for an answer to why i feel this way in this world and why this is this world and why why why and why again what is life
- and i can almost hear the sound of your lips opening up just enough to even breathe the same air i have breathed and let alone to say those words or those words that i do not know if they have been written before in a place you trusted as safe and how will i know what matters more to you and how will i know what is true and what is just underneath a hesitated word and what is right in front of me but acted with that gesture that i can no longer see who you really are.
aug 3 2015 ∞
aug 3 2015 +