A different format to the Alcohol Fuelled Activities list of yore.

• As remembered by myself. (I was _waaassted_). At 16 years old I was invited to two parties, in the same town, on the same night, about 2 miles apart. I went to the first one but it was sort of crap so I walked to the other one, despite the pouring rain. I reached the other one just as the police were asking everyone to leave after some dude got bottled. I then walked all the way back to the first one and spent the rest of the evening sitting under the hand drier in the bathroom. Woo, rock on.
• As told by Adam. Charlotte got wassteddd and went back with Adam to his flat. She tried to take his pants off. He said no because she was too drunk. She asked for a bucket, please. He got one for her. She vommed in it. She then poured her vodka, rum and partially digested chicken pie cocktail all over him. Good old Adam was very understanding and forced her to leave, walking her home, still covered in her boke.
• As remembered by myself. My friend, Chris, was waaasteed. Chris has an odd habit of, when he's drunk, replacing certain words with completely different words of a similar length. One night I was out with him and a lot of his friends I didn't know. He introduced me as "This is Jen, she works at a waterfall!" I basically followed him around all night saying "Hi, yeah, Jen, that's right. Restaurant, not waterfall. I work at a restaurant."
• As told by Arran. Arran and James were waaastedd. The plan was for the two of them to have a good night out together and then go back to James's flat to crash. Unfortunately, Arran and James fell out and James went home and locked himself in his flat. So, poor Arran was all alone and seriously pissed off. After spending a few hours hurling abuse through James's letterbox (unlikely James was particularly receptive) Arran went down into the car park. He tried all the doors of all the cars in the car park and struck lucky when he found one unlocked. He climbed in the boot of the car and fell asleep to be awoken the next morning by the angry and, albeit, slightly confused owner of said car.
• As remembered by myself. Kit was wasstedd I was in the Students Union being chatted up by some guys when Kit ran in. She looked wildly around before spotting me. She came running over, I did my best to hide. She grabbed me and looked me straight in the eye and said "Jen! I've just had sex! In an alley-way! With a man called Dave!" I didn't have much time to respond before she asked me "Do I smell like dick?" and blew in my face.
• As remembered (just) by myself. I was, yes, waaasted I returned home after a night out to find my house had been cling filmed and tin foiled. I was too drunk to be annoyed so instead I was just confused. Turns out Jamie and Dan had left the party early and gone back to my house with my flatmate, Carrie. Carrie equipped them with the cling film and tin foil and then kicked back to continue drinking whilst they spread the havoc. Yes, Carrie aided in the vandalism of our own house. I kept finding strips of cling film for weeks following.