This isn't a list. I'm just thinking my thoughts, to myself. You confuse me so undeniably so. I love you to the point where I never thought humanly possible. I never knew or felt love before you. It hurts and it sucks. I wish I knew if I was that friend who could only be your friend, or the friend who could possibly be more. Even a little chance is all I need. I don't know what to do anymore. Keep doing the same thing every day, every fucking confusing day, love you? Or move on to someone else, and still feel the same about you. Who knows, I could find someone I love who loves me back; I want to know if there is anyone who would care for me the way I care for you. Do you feel the same about me even if you don't realize the lengths? I want to know, I need to know. Because I go every day feeling this way, and I can't contain it any longer. There's so much I'd do for you. I don't give a shit if you don't feel the same, I could care less if you hated me. It's just how I feel. Of course if you did feel the same that'd change everything, I'd be so happy I don't even want to know what would be going on in my mind. 3 years this has built, and it's about to crash because I can't handle it any longer. I'm afraid if I do move on and fall for someone else it won't be genuine like it is with you, or even I'll still care just as much as I did before. I wouldn't want to drag on someone else if the feelings I have for them aren't real, because I don't want to make someone else deal with what you do to me. If I fell in love with someone else how would you feel? What will your reaction be? Will you care at all? I need to know. I need to know.