• best ways to die- drowning

even if i had somewhere to go on new years i wouldn't go because i can't leave mom alone __ that would be too sad and lonely for her

• not pretty on the inside or outside
• thoughts occurring while throwing up unneeded and unnecessary food in my toilet
  • don't tell anyone that--shameful~clean up after yourself always and don't leave a trace of the petty inside/outside tragedy unfolding at night

an apartment in new york city with roommates from different countries who were clean where x could sleep over and candles warm sheets dream catchers and cigarettes and coffee__// or maybe my own place with white walls and wood floors

decorate for christmas even though i don't really like it anymore and mom never liked it and no one goes to our house anyway

• you look better without a beard
• i love that red and black plaid jacket you always wear
  • i will get you nice shirts for your birthday or christmas

all my thoughts are about you__.__

i only like the cold when it's from lack of nourishment or when you're here

• everything is warm when you're around

knock me off your couch but lay on top of me on the floor- i love your logic

smoking in bed~headaches backaches

i don't want anyone to be alone because alone is when bad things happen

lolita. never let me go. scott pilgrim. high-rise

"it was a pleasure to burn." -fahrenheit 451

we should never be held responsible for our self-inflicted scars/ they were done by someone other than ourselves- sometimes wanted, always needed/