–– sometime late summer 2019

• i had just gotten off of work, we planned on him picking me up. it's 6 pm, barely beginning to darken. him and a friend (who lives 2 hours away) were leaning against the back of the friend's car, trunk open, eating mcflurries. not sure what type of car our friend had, but it was a deep purple, old, and loud car. very cool. they dropped me off at home, windows rolled down, music blasting. i felt so good. an hour later, he's home and asks if i can come over. my mom said yes, surprisingly. he picked me up, it was dark, and i remember looking at him while at a red light and admiring how the light from the street looked on his face. i don't know why i remember this day so clearly. i just remember thinking about how much i loved him.

–– 13 feb, 2021

• getting into the car at the airport, seeing him for the first time in 50+ days. i didn't want to stop hugging him. it felt like everything in the world was better the second i sat down. it felt normal, like i never left. like all that time before visiting, those agonizing days, full of waiting and crying and calling for hours on end, didn't exist. he was just picking me up from somewhere once again. i hope the next time i see him it'll be the same.

–– sometime late 2019/early 2020

• after school. walked home (his house). said he had a surprise for me. it was a blanket fort in the basement living room, mattress and blankets inside and everything. i remember we watched se7en and fell asleep. very good day.