• I miss those nights when I would lie next to you under the covers in the dark and you would hold me close until we fell asleep.
• I miss your kisses.
• I miss watching you work.
• I miss those nights on the hill when everything was just so perfect and right that I felt like we were infinite and never ending.
• I miss being able to walk up to your house whenever I needed to see you.
• I miss your laugh.
• I miss breaking plates.
• I miss listening to our favorite songs together.
• I miss making love to you.
• I miss writing music with you.
• I miss being able to look straight into your eyes. They are such a beautiful blue. Sometimes I think I can see into you thr...

• The Passing of Time
• Math
• Knowing Right from Wrong
• Making Decisions on the Fly
• Bar chords. :P
• Honestly? Caring about school work.
• Deciding whether I am afraid of dying or not.
• Sports. :P (Stupid knee injury...)
• Cooking ;)
• Keeping a planner.
• Keeping a journal.
• Being nice to my parents.
• Making money.
• Being a good friend.
• Saying no.

• Living in Akagera National Park in Rwanda for three nights with baboons climbing all over our hut and zebras flying down the hills.
• Roaming free without trails on the volcanic plains in Iceland.
• Hiking from hamlet to hamlet in Corsica.
• Hiking along the coast of Wales for five days.
• Angel's Landing, Zion National Park.
• Sailing the coast of British Columbia for two weeks and ocean kayaking.
• Shoeshoeing to the yert, makin' fires and snow forts, late night stories. :)
• Impromptu picnic by the mountain stream with curry and guitars.
• Bodysurfing in the North Sea.
• Perigrine falcon trail/ seashell trail/naked trails in the foothills.

• Failure.
• Forgetting what it's like to be a kid.
• The world turing to more shit than it already is.
• Confinement.
• Death. A little bit.

Basically I'm afraid of losing all the things I already have. Such an American.

• Be mysterious.
• Come with me to see the Perigrine Falcons and how the City Moves.
• Show me good music.
• Be capable of intelligent conversation.
• Care. About everything and everyone.

That's it. I'm easy to please.

• The Paris Exposition of 1889
• First Man on the Moon
• The Building of Stonehenge
• DINOSAURS
• The day Columbus arrived in the Americas
• The Building of Macchu Pichu
• The day people started using language
• The Big Bang
• The First Beatles Concert
• Shakespeare's First Play

• Fly
• Become invisible
• Be part of the crew on a generational spaceship to Alpha Centauri. :D
• Grow old and die, but never age. Which I guess I can do, in a way.
• Own a bar in the middle of the desert.
• Meet F. Scott Fitzgerald, Vincent van Gogh, and Winston Churchill.
• Buy a working jet pack and an alpaca on the same day.
• Travel through time and space.
• Have a flying bed that would take me some place new every night, and I would wake up in that place and stay for a random length of time before flying again.

• Honey and roses after rain
• The lake during a harsh, windy thunderstorm
• Bakeries
• Old books/brand new books
• Sea spray
• Wet grass after the sprinkler
• Tea
• Bonfires
• Aveda Shampoo
• Onions
• Overturned dirt just before planting
• Candle smoke just after the flame has been blown out
• My grandparents' house
• Bark
• Citrus
• Mexico City
• Caves
• Art museums
• The Paris underground

• Applying for colleges, while wondering if it might just be easier to hop on the next cargo train to have an adventure instead.
• Writing songs with lonely harmonies and sporadic drums
• Writing a paper on Deconstructionism
• Planning that trip to Europe. Slowly...
• Preparing for the threat of a Romneypocalypse.
• Learning the names of all the stars visible to the naked eye.
• Attempting to break my old phone without it being too obvious that I completely meant to.
• Avoiding driving. At all costs.
• Watching all the shows/movies I missed out on in my youth.
• Making lists. Pretending my calendar doesn't exist and time is really not passing and wondering if it is really as linear a...

• Rødgrød med Fløde
• Anything made at Maricela's or at the taco stand on 4th.
• Grapefruit and Dark Chocolate gelato
• Black Sticky Rice with Mango
• Freshly picked berries, particularly salmon berries
• Honeysuckle nectar
• Naan and Tikka Masala
• Larb
• Tofu
• Open-faced sandwiches :D
• Brie.
• Belgian Waffles
• Fries with Andalouse Sauce
• Mac and Cheese with the Extra-Extra Hot Habanero Sauce
• Strawberry-Rhubarb Pie
• Falafel
• Chocolate Covered Pomegranates
• Baby tomatoes

Almost everything makes me cry, but:

• The day I left home for college and I had to leave the people and the desert that I love behind. I still cry about it sometimes. I broke off too much of my soul and left it there.
• The day it really sank in that my great grandmother was gone.
• The day I found out that my good friend's little brother died.
• The day my boyfriend broke up with me while I was still thousands of miles away and couldn't have a proper goodbye.
• Every time I watch The Perks of Being a Wallflower
• Every time I listen to Sigur Ros
• When I visited the Genocide Memorial in Rwanda.
• All those times I was landed in the ER due to excruciating pain...
• The first time I got stung by a bee

Depends on what you mean by losing EVERYTHING. I suppose if I lost everything, including my memory, my personality, myself.. Than I wouldn't do much of anything except probably sit and be one with the universe. If I still had my personality and the ability to remember basic maths and speech at least, I think I'd have a pretty epic adventure, because it would be a second chance for me. I could be whatever I wanted. In that case I would:

• Become a detective. Maybe just so that I could find out about my past. From the perspective of having a memory, I wouldn't want to remember most of it, however, if I had no recollection, I suppose I would wish to know.
• Make new friends. Any friends I accumulated would probably think I'm crazy, so naturally, they would be very good friends.
• I would go on an epic road trip in a stol...

• Honeybadger. 4lyfe.

• Running back to school to get to class on time with Valentina from Chile and Jacob, carrying our tortillas from the stand in the wind and the pouring rain. Not sure why that stands out.
• West Winds Poetry Slams #1 and #3. Total hits.
• Driving up the canyon with Sami, Forrest, and Clare. I have never felt more infinte.
• My first kiss. On top of a mountain.
• Ms. Nick's class. I will never forget it.
• Dancing in the parking lot barefoot under the huge moon. Thrice.
• West Winds documentary. Couch.
• Pizza adventures. Ihop adventures. Village Inn adventures.
• Riding the train to and from school.
• Walking in the mist on the cliffs of Iceland alone. Zebras running over the crest ...

• Why am I so crazy? And why is that a bad thing? Or is it even a bad thing?
• Is there life on other planets? And if there is, are they wondering the same thing?
• Is there a point?
• What would happen if people just stopped hating each other?
• Where is Waldo, really?
• Who the hell am I?
• Is life really greener on the other side?
• Is the glass half full or half empty?
• Why am I deaf?
• Are colorblind people really colorblind, or are the rest of us just colorblind?
• What do people really think of me? Does it matter?
• Is time travel possible?
• Why do certain songs make me cry?
• What would it be like to ride a train out...

• Jennifer: Thank you for making gym bearable. Those arm wrestling matches have saved me time and time again. Also for teaching me 50 numbers of Pi and having picnics in the 28th dimension. Also, thanks for being a badass and the smartest girl I've ever met.
• Clare: Thanks for making middle school and high school not the pit of despair. Thanks for always being there for me and being a great source of advice. Thanks for teaching me runes and sharing with me your love of nature and your amazing poetry. You will go far.
• Ande: Thanks for staying my friend for so long!! I can't believe we've known each other since kindergarten. Thank you for all of the fantastic adventures we've had together, and pulling me out of my shell. You are such a beautiful, mysterious person.

How many times have I thought about this? I practically had a mental breakdown today. I had to walk back and forth across my bathroom with the door shut, pounding my fists against my skull. THIS is not what I want from life. I don't want to go to school, just so I can get a job, and a house with a white picket fence, and a husband, and children. That's not living. I need to be different. I need to escape.

• I want life to show me that people do care about other people.
• I want life to show me that there is still beauty left.
• I want life to give me an adventure.
• I want life to write me a five word poem called 'My Life' that I can read aloud at my funeral.
• I want life to sprinkle some spices over my skin and stick my head in ice water.
• I want life to sing to me in the rain.

• Go to all of the festivals! Especially the Greek Festival, the Arts Festival, the Llama Festival, Holi Day Festival, Living Traditions Festival, etc. There are so many great annual festivals.
• Go urban exploring. Out here in the middle of the desert, there are a lot of really old, amazing rundown builings to explore and take photographs in.
• Hike. With the mountains at my doorstep, what better thing to do?
• Sail. With that huge lake to the West of us, what better thing to do?
• Go cafe hopping. There are so many good cafes in this town I am honestly stunned. Also, that's where the poetry slams and acoustic open mics happen. That is my life.
• Visit the Gateway area. Besides the huge outdoor mall, there is Art Access Gallery and Spy Hop Records. I spend my life at ...

• "That's the best revenge of all: happiness. Nothing drives people crazier than seeing someone have a good fucking life." - Chuck Palahniuk
• "Beauty is twice beauty, and what is good is doubly good,when it is a matter of two socks made of wool in winter." - Pablo Neruda
• "My formula for living is quite simple. I get up in the morning and I go to bed at night. In between, I occupy myself as best I can." - Cary Grant
• "A great artist is a great man in a great child." - Victor Hugo
• "All men dream, but not equally. Those who dream by night in the dusty recesses of their minds, wake in the day to find that it was vanity: but the dreamers of the day are dangerous men, for they may act on their dreams with open eyes, to make them possible." - T. E. Lawrence

• Living

• Going up that secret trail that has been long overgrown to visit the Perigrine Falcons
• Writing letters to nobody (or dead poeple)
• Singing in the shower and playing guitar in the rain
• Dancing barefoot in the street at midnight until my feet are as black as the sky.
• Reading Pablo Neruda and trying to understand Jack Kerouac and Irish literature...
• Travelling. Best part of everyday.
• Having intellectual conversations with random people on the train
• Driving in the back of my friend's cars, music blasting, windows down, feeling infinite.
• Collecting random junk for a sculpture I am not yet sure how to make.
• Daydreaming. Nightdreaming.

• Once
• The Perks of Being a Wallflower
• The Secret Garden
• Avatar
• Whale Rider
• Totoro
• Hugo
• Heima
• Adam
• Harry Potter :)
• The Art of Getting By
• Midnight in Paris
• The Invention of Lying
• Life is Beautiful
• A Beautiful Mind
• Across the Universe
• Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
• Birdemic Shock and Terror

• a secret project involving paper cranes and a hill and a box and a note
• Getting the hell out of here (x2)
• finishing my solo album and fucking playing some rad shows
• Getting ready for teaching poetry in Rwanda/UN Internship
• Finishing the school year without failing all my courses...
• Beating Dermatillomania
• Finding a job...
• Figuring out what the hell I should do with myself
• A frustrating paper on Structural Adjustment Programs
• Losing weight/eating healthier -- Beach Bod for Greece!
• Updating my sad wardrobe
• Growing my hair out (dying it?)
• Figuring out what to do with all this change I've accumulated

• You.
• Whai thingz r thingz.
• Iz da wurld ending.
• What da fuqq is goin on. Bro.
• Whai r hash(tag)browns bettur dan real potatotes.
• Whai queshtons count as thingz i dunno.
• Linear regression. I purty shur i new dat, subconsiously, at sum point.

• Sigur Ros
• Imogen Heap
• Of Monsters and Men
• Marketa Irglova and Glen Hansard
• Johnny Flynn
• Kimbra
• Lykke Li
• Bon Iver
• Ellie Goulding
• Jason Mraz
• Beach House
• Florence and the Machine
• ME lololol jk

My backpack is irreplaceable and I never go anywhere without it. I feel completely naked if I don't have it on me. Everything that is important to me is in that bag.

• My black poetry notebook.
• 20s clothing and two more outfits for the movie I'm filming.
• Stick on mustaches.
• A tablecloth.
• A whole ton of sharpies. Not to mention pencils.
• Food. Mainly I always keep a mandarin orange for a snack.
• Bandaids and pain killers.
• My keys and my wallet and my phone. All the essentials.
• Slippers.
• A hairbrush.
• Loose change.
• A volcanic rock.

• Hopippolla by Sigur Ros
• I Know You Care by Ellie Goulding
• Run by Daughter
• Falling Slowly by Glen Hansard
• I Know Places by Lykke Li
• Asleep on a Train by Radical Face
• Open Your Eyes by Snow Patrol
• Sunny Road by Emiliana Torrini
• Sea of Love by Cat Power
• Hearts a Mess by Gotye
• Time by Invisible Elephant
• Colorblind by Counting Crows
• Be Not So Fearful by Bill Fay

Hope this isn't too strange.

• The sound of a massive rain/wind/thunderstorm roaring through the valley.
• Vegetables sizzling in a pan for a stir fry.
• The sound a seashell makes when you put it to your ear.
• The sound your footsteps make when you enter a large, empty room like in a cathedral or the old train station downtown.
• Windchimes
• The sound a rock makes when you throw it into a large chasm.
• Echoes
• Leaves crunching under foot.
• That deafening silence.
• The clink of change in a pocket.
• The click of keys in a door.
• The sound of mist rising from large waterfalls.
• Crows calling.
• African drums.

• Math
• Studying/taking notes
• Relationships
• Settling for reality
• Painting
• Not thinking about death once or twice a day
• Poetry
• Not being a self-absorbed bitch who should probably kill herself
• Explaining myself
• Playing instruments
• Understanding anything at all
• Texting
• Driving
• Cooking
• Taking tests
• Not complaining
• Not procrastinating until the last second
• Dancing

• Run away.
• Travel the world free of charge.
• Stroll into Buckingham Palace and hug the queen.
• Walk around barefoot always.
• Steal a car and take paid leave off of work everyday for the rest of my life and roam around.
• Redecorate everyone's houses for them.
• Buy the Tate Modern.
• Stow away on random ships.
• Get some people to clone a woolly mammoth so I could have it as a pet.
• Free all the non-messed up animals from the zoos, and get them back to the wild safely and able to sustain themselves.
• Make the entire salt flats into installation art for a month.

I would make an awesome rebel.

• Climbing out of my crib.
• The day my grandfather, my younger sister, and I ventured far into the rain forest to find the hidden totem poles and ate wild berries. How we then emerged in the rain on the edge of the sea and I found a silver spoon and a marble, and my grandfather told us grand stories about pirates. The smell of the ramshackle fish shop where we ordered salmon. The long walk on the highway to the old town with the empty jail and the sweet shop that smelled like magic. Walking back home in the howling thunderstorm. Flashlights bobbing as we ran. The fish in the paper bag. I have never felt so alive.
• Being forced to fish in Florida, and reeling in that huge fish with the sharp teeth that made our captor's hands bleed.
• The fairy houses my friends and I built into the long hedge growing on the fence a...

• Write letters to no one until they write back
• Eat French Fries with the Mona Lisa, Falafel with Venus de Milo, and Orange Chicken with Cleopatra.
• Sail the Seven Seas
• Become friends with a whale
• Fall in love forever
• Write a book of poetry
• Go on a road trip with no predetermined destination
• Fly to the Moon
• Grow a secret garden
• Build my own little house on the northwest coast and become self-sufficient
• Make peace with the spiders
• Learn a Second Language
• Live in a foriegn country.
• Make a pilgrimage to Mecca, participate in the Holi Festival in India, and celebrate New Year's in China.

• The Road Not Taken by Robert Frost
• Ode to My Socks by Pablo Neruda
• Thirteen Ways of Looking At a Blackbird by Wallace Stevens
• Fire Island by May Swenson
• So Beautiful is the Tree of Night by Pauline Hanson
• The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock by T. S. Eliot
• The Night a Sailor Came to Me in a Dream by Diane Wakoski
• Just by Judith Johnson Sherwin
• Change is Not Always Progress by Haki R. Madhubuti
• Mexico City Blues by Jack Kerouac
• Flight by Steve Allen

• The Perks of Being a Wallflower by Stephen Chbosky
• Paper Towns by John Green
• The Wanderer by Sharon Creech
• The Alchemist by Paulo Cohelo
• Night by Elie Wiesel
• The Great Gatsby by F. Scott Fitzgerald
• Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are Dead by Tom Stoppard
• King Lear by Shakespeare
• The Glass Castle by Jeanette Walls
• Stargirl by Jerry Spinelli
• The Little Prince by Antoine Jean-Baptiste Marie Roger de Saint Exupéry
• The Secret Garden by Frances Hodgson Burnett
• Their Eyes Were Watching God by Zora Neale Hurston
• A Wrinkle in Time by Madeleine L'Engle
• The Kite Runner by Khaled Hosseini
• The Harry Potter Series by J. K. Rowling ...

• Wandering Limbs by Kimbra
• Lilikoi Boy by Jonsi
• Rambling Man by Laura Marling
• Nantes by Beirut
• Colorblind by Counting Crows
• Let Go by Frou Frou
• Asleep on the Train by Radical Face
• Don't I Know Enough by I Am Oak
• Plain Gold Ring (Kimbra's version)
• Hoppipolla by Sigur Ros
• Boats and Birds by Gregory and the Hawk
• Your Hand in Mine by Explosions in the Sky
• Barnacled Warship by Johnny Flynn
• White Noise by Mogwai
• I Know Places by Lykke Li
• Canvas by Imogen Heap
• When Your Mind's Made Up by Glen Hansard
• The Hill by Marketa Irglova
• In Your Arms by Kinna Grannis
• Safe and Sound by Taylor Swift and The Ci...