"So she became impulsive, scared by her inaction into perpetual action."

• i wanted you to stay, and i’m sorry that i make it impossibly difficult for you to do exactly that
• but just so you know, you haven't been such a good sport lately either
• shall we call it even then?
• on to other (insignificant) matters: isn't it an awful shame to see everything you've ever worked hard for go spiraling down the drain?
• not that i've never experienced that feeling before
• trust me, if there's an award for failing most things consecutively, i'd be the obvious frontrunner (might even be first but i'd fail at that too)
• i'd say that i was joking except that i'm not
• i'm dead serious like seriously
• oh hey look at me i'm complaining again
• people say i'm cryptic
• sure, ok, i'll play along
• i don't know i guess i'm just one vague notion after another
• probably why people opt to stay away from me though
• sometimes i think that if there's one thing i was exceptionally good at it would be pushing people away
• am i really that repulsive
• maybe i am, not that i'd care or anything
• a mistake: i thought that maybe if i'd kept it bottled up inside or swept them all under the rug that i'd forget these issues sooner or later
• might i say that this shit blows
• because just when i thought i had it good, reality hits me square in the face and the unspeakable happens
• god i'm sick and tired of this constant struggle between trying and not trying enough
• i'm done with life
• what's next?