- this jv baby is sad. jvb found boy with a sweet heart and gorgeous face with golden green eyes. A boy that made her leave all the other boys she had seduced and befriended within the past lonely months- in a heartbeat she stopped caring,she stopped playing stupid games with many hearts, this new boy had given her a cigerette and said, "hey whats your name again?"
- he sends her lots of emails, a lot sexy but exhausting, but it makes her happy. makes her fucking smile again, as if the last fucking two years didn't happen.
- like, as if not a short time ago, a stupid junkie wasn't waving a gun in her face, like a stupid junkie wasn't hurting her, wasn't keeping her locked up in empty rooms for days.
- like she hadn't heard it all before, "I'm clean, baby, the drugs aren't even the problem anymore"
- like, as if she could blame that boy though. he was crazy, something went wrong in his brain chemistry. maybe it was the drugs. but he was paranoid and quick to anger, addictive and abusive. suffering from some horrible secrets.
- too bad. it happened, so I'll tell you this now, jvb, you're probably making a mistake. And of course, I'll always let you make mistakes and learn, but you've already made this mistake before. and you suffered, suffered far too fucking much for an 18 year old girl.
- it's a mistake, because whats the difference between a crazy drug dealer and a crazy ex junkie.
- because people change? because he's clean now?
- stop, you'll make me laugh. yes there is no dope running in his blood, but you already saw it jvb. The way he gets jealous when you speak to other guys, and the way he depends on his medicene to keep him sane. the way his laughter will stop in less than .001 fucking seconds, and sometimes you can't tell if hes joking or not\
- drug addicition, bipolar disorder, adhd, everything. your warning signs are all there.
- good luck, because I know you'll give him what he wants anyways.
- a list within a list, and here's why jvb is so fascinated and sparkly eyed about this boy
- he reads books, he knows more than her
- but he still draws stupid cartoons in the middle of class
- and he can pick her up and never drop her,
- he's got eyes, a goldish green she's never seen before
- he makes funny faces and kisses her when no ones looking
nov 12 2014 ∞
nov 12 2014 +