let me be at ease for once in my life

i want to feel like flowers.

it is summer here and i have nothing to do for the next two months and i just want to become the person i'm supposed to be

and stop crying after we make love, dropping my tears on your shoulder and making you worry that i'm getting worse

i want to braid hair and to let my curls entwine in every possibility of change

specially, to get out of bed and not feel the weight of guilt

"i should be accomplishing something"

i don't know what is that keeps my eyes looking for faults in the past, i don't want to change the present but still

it's so fucking scary to feel loved. what if i blow it up?

but you kiss me on the forehead and says you'll protect me from all evil. amen

maybe all i need is to cry it out of me

cry the white viscous worm out

and i will be free.

this silly concept of freedom, i will swallow it without the habitual pretentiousness.

teach me how to feel the sun between the rib cage

people seem to do it so effortlessly, i'm scared

i'm so scared