hi i love it when websites feel like a house!!! i like the feeling here, as if you walk onto my porch and see my random lists taped up to the front door. i just decided to post my list of favorite words - i had a longer list a few years ago on a different phone that died on me, but i started this one the last time i got to trip on shrooms. i was stuck in the car on the way to another hiking trail when they started to kick in. i just started writing down words in the notes app, words that are vivid, evocative, percussive, words which feel golden to say. i particularly despise the term "mouth-feel" but i guess it's applicable here. there was a really good song on the radio i noted down too: "Dusty Springfield has a surprising and refreshing voice. a rather androgynous tone that carries the full weight of belting out. the name makes me think of the 1920s Great Depression dust storms, and i expect to hear a somber man with a deep voice, maybe with a bit of twang to send home that feeling of thankless and back breaking labor. instead i feel a light drizzle of rain washing over me, tamping down the dust storms as i listen to 'Summer Is Over'."

i'm not very familiar with a lot of older artists (let's say pre-1995 is where i find myself lost unless i'm looking for Queen or Iron Maiden), so i was surprised to find i've been hearing countless songs originally performed by Dusty throughout my whole life. "Son Of A Preacher Man", "Take Another Little Piece Of My Heart", "I Only Want To Be With You", just to name a few because the list goes on and on.

i think a lot about a quote attributed to someone's french professor: "if you did something like going to the grocery store without the goggles of habit and categories, you would go crazy with pure sense and joy." it's hard to take the goggles off and stop staring down a white wall of factual apathy, but shrooms make the goggles, the categories, AND the wall dissolve into nothingness. i can connect to things in ways i never would have before. i think i never truly noticed the song before, and probably would have ignored it again had my goggles not been removed. i never would have learned about her life, her talents, or her enormous impact on music to this day. it is easy to take the minutia of life for granted, and lots of people drive themselves mad searching for some greater purpose or passion to fulfill them - it's much harder, i think, to keep your eyes open to the world around you and fall in love with it, every little bit. crypto nft matrix, anti wrinkle straw, $700,000 2024 Ford FuckOff550 that's physically larger than god, idk lol who cares about any of that stuff why do you need that? does anyone want to go outside and find butterflies and watch pigeons strut down the sidewalk? i feel like literally everything else in my life is a distraction from the actual earth around me that i need to be spending time on, like everyone is so caught up in their commodity fetishism (i know, i am using this term loosely right now) theyre willing to throw themselves into huge amounts of debt for...like...a full set of matching furniture in the living room. sure it looks nice but how long are you planning on working yourself to death paying that off??? does it make you happy to go to work 40hrs a week just to get more stuff and more debts??? i dont have ANY debts and i wish i didn't have to work at all. i just want to sit under an old growth tree with binoculars and watch rainbow lorikeets all day every day. i think everyone in the world would be happier if they opened their eyes to the living beings around them, big and small.

i like to take walks and point at things and say "what's that?" so i am learning bird and plant identification a little at a time. i can pick out the cheeps and chirps of lorikeets easily, while mynahs make the quintessential "birdsong" and are a bit harder to distinguish. Mynahs are an invasive species that are often confused with native noisy miners - visually they are similar in size and color, with mynahs being dark brown and black and miners having grey coloration, but noisy miners are VERY VERY LOUD. i passed by one sitting on a low branch by the sidewalk, and i wouldnt have noticed it, had it not let out a single ear-splittingly loud chirp. WOW! little dude, you are an adorable hazard to my eardrums. theyre amazing!

honestly i think i'll just stop writing right now and go take a long walk while it's still springtime. summer is approaching slowly...menacingly...showing its teeth with random 35 degree days. not looking forward to the hottest summer ever recorded! i hope i havent been rambling too much, i didnt sleep at all last night so i'm feeling quite like a lukewarm pile of scrambled eggs has replaced my brain. cannot wait to sleep the best sleep i've ever slept tonight!