Sunday, February 1:

• it's February. WHAT.
• werk schmerk
  • slow start - was so out of it and i wanted to cry at one point before my break
  • got complimented on my coffee again - always a great feeling
  • battered fish wrap for lunch - was pretty good hey?
  • legit, i don't know if i'd still work here if it weren't for my amazing work mates and regulars that i've became friends with
• dropped Donico home after work - was soooo tempted to take a sneaky shot of him sleeping haha
• went home for a bit before A picked us up for ball
• woooooo first win in a while! - and it feels good to get shots in hehe
• ribs for dinner whilst watching the Aus Open men's finals - GO NOVAK
• procrasti-packing for SHOUT which starts tomorrow

Monday, February 2:

• broken sleep 'cause Jeric called me at like 630 to fill in the morning shift - said no 'cause i needed to drive dad to his appointment before SHOUT (turned out I could've worked that day 'cause mum ended up taking the day off)
• stayed up until A went to placement
• went back to sleep and got woken up by mum at 10 'cause she got excited for my Christmas present 2 months too late haha
• got woken up again at around 1130 for brunch + to watch the halftime show of the Superbowl
  • Seahawks had that game. they stuffed up lol
• finished packing and waited for Thom to pick me up
• had Subway for merienda - caught up with each other rather than plan for Sydney West
• SHOUT 2015 begins today!!!
  • basketball and squash and Shipwrecks while waiting for everyone to come
  • had Pho for dinner
  • opening worship led by Joseph
  • funs facts with everyone to break the ice/meet the rest of the HH
  • KKs throughout the week - heaps cute
  • roomies with Gerty, Faith and Karen - stayed up 'til 12 - laters to waking up

Tuesday, February 3:

• 5am worship followed by breakfast and Mass - thanks Faith and Joseph for the toasties!
• WORKSHOP 1 - Worship led by Kuya Erick (went for 8 hours!!!! no ragrets but)
• KFC for lunch whilst discussing the split in CFC
  • such politics, much drama
• Ignatius Contemplation - continuation of the worship workshop
• experience of praise, worship and GLORY
  • Exodus 15
• mini 121 with Thom before we started cooking for dinner - all the feels
  • spicy mango chicken wraps and salted caramel and almond pecan fried ice-cream - mmmmmm
• Thom's worship to enter the night session - even more feels
• Session 1: No Greater Love by Faith Estera - it was like God was speaking directly to me through her
  • discussion group with Nikki, Gerty and Topher
• catch ups with Faith part 1

Wednesday, February 4:

• 530 wake up call for morning worship - thanks Cy for the extra 30 mins!
• Eggs, bacon, mushroom, spinach and toast with hollandaise for brekkie - thanks Hawkes!
• 9am mass - fishing for days
• Workshop 2: Prayer by Kristone - there are still so many things to learn about prayer ahhhhh
• free time for 6 hours!!!
  • caught up with Nelly and Mayon :) miss my girls!
  • Pho for lunch (at a different place) - dat honey chicken though
  • sofa forts - knocked out for 2 hours
• Rosary and preps for dinner - spicy wings and fettucini - thanks Blacknepz!
• song teaching - Higher (or Lights by Ellie Goulding haha) - new fast faves!
• Jed's worship followed by Session 2: Exceeding Excellence by Ate Chrissy
• being trolls in the dark - Jed scaring Alyssa
• making a fail MV/promo for Cluster
• played Something Different - new favourite card game - "NGINIT!" and pirates
• Analiz and I matching pantulogs
• Pasion: "my water broke!" - poor Alyssa's sleeping bag got soaked :( haha

Thursday, February 5:

• 530 wake up - went back to sleep after worship before brekkie and mass
  • pancakes and french toast - thanks HSB!
• sudden urge to go Confession after Mass - totally worth it - St. Agatha, pray for us
• Workshop 3: CFC Direction led by Tito Dennis
• Tito and Tita Reyes shouted us Pho for lunch today!!! (totally rate the first pho place we went to - better than Pho 76)
• Workshop 4: Small Groups Training by Raimie - just a reminder of how much love I need to show my girls
• free time 'till Rosary - KK fails, Wood Man and demolishing the Jelly Joys
• another nap before dinner
• Nachos and mango milkshakes for dinner - thanks East!
• CPT and worship led by Cyron
• Session 3: The Way to Love by Joseph
  • 121 with Gerty instead of discussion groups - God bless her
• caught up with bae - broke down though
• old school YFC jams with Analiz and Jed
• sharings with Faith part 2!!! - ALL the emotions

Friday, February 6:

• 5am wake up call - got only 2-3 hours sleep lol woops - still thankful i get to wake up every morning this week with my HH
• slept until breakfast was served - viet tapsilog and fried rice - thanks Comm Based!
• slept again until Mass
• road trip to Palm Beach!
  • party car with Tim, Gerty and Nikki
  • fish and chips and calamari for lunch
  • Pasion's foot got stuck in the mud hahahaha
  • Flourdes and Nikki Floriada
  • The Boathouse wharf - all the tourist photos - poor Tim and Topher
  • high tides at the beach - Home and Away - all the photos part 2
  • a snippet of the Bible Garden - would be great to visit but there was a wedding there today haha
• Maccas run on the way back
  • song car games to pass the time and keep us awake - haven't laughed that hard in a long time!
• slumber party with everyone when we got back
• got picked up by A and had dinner at the Pho place - i feel like a regular already hahaha
• started catching up on stories whilst watching Ali
• rejection after rejection for Cluster attendance tomorrow - sigh.
• first panic attack after SHOUT - sighhhhh.

Saturday, February 7:

• had brunch with the fams before i got ready for Cluster
• already felt out of place the minute I got there - praise God for my HH and their love and support after breaking down
  • praise God for the Cerdans and for always making time for us no matter what
• being part of music min with my HH was the biggest blessing of today - and seeing Koreen :)
• mass singing at Good Sheps
• Harry Potter and Prisoner of Azkaban whilst eating dinner
• mini catch up with Bernard - can't wait to have a proper 121/catch up with him
• napped for an hour

Sunday, February 8:

• 630 wake up for Colour Run 2015!!!
  • Bernard, Salvos, Ryan, Cis and A
  • crazy Zumba sesh
  • soooooo packed! - probs ran half of the 5ks hehe
  • getting smashed with paint is pretty fun hey haha worth the messiness :p
  • getting turnt at 11 with the mini festival - ASOT!!! lol jokes
• trekked it to the city for Mary's Burgers for lunch - yay free public transport!!!
  • I actually really liked the sauce and burger, but probs not worth $15 as a meal hey
• had the longest and best shower and nap before basketball
  • versed Panthers - won by 2! yayyyy (my new goal is to finish all my fast breaks :))

Monday, February 9:

• HAPPY BIRTHDAY THOM!!!
• best sleep last night after such a long day
• TWD COMES BACK!!! gotta wait 'til tomorrow to watch though 'cause of bae lol
• leftover fried rice and longganisa for brunch is always great
• watching the Grammys whilst looking at how bruised my big toes are :( so glad it's nothing too serious...

Tuesday, February 10:

• i think the most exciting thing that happened today was my phone call with Noel - God bless him
• and the fact that a girl got shot outside the HJs at West Hoxton. 10 minutes away from home. By police because she was holding a knife. FAH.
• and dad buying Cis and I snack packs.
• and routine Tuesdays with bae.
• and how I got to finally watch TWD
• okay so more than one interesting thing happened today LOL

Wednesday, February 11:

• Feast of Our Lady of Lourdes!!!
• first day back at work
  • got smashed lol - but it was nice when the regulars noticed that I was gone last week and asked where I was :) and when Mark took care of my tab because I was working hard today. Bless him!
  • one of them even got sad when I didn't say bye to them after I finished haha
  • Dillon knows Aldric hahahaha smallest world
• Mass today to celebrate my feast day hehe
  • God bless Fr. Epeli and his homilies
  • and God bless him and his pure joy when I went up to say hi - "LOURDES! HAPPY FEAST DAY! I had to control myself from smiling during Mass today"

Thursday, February 12:

• (sorry I haven't updated in a while. work has taken it's toll on me and it's been exhausting)
• got called in to work 'cause Megan called in sick
  • got smashed. again. yaaaay.
  • at least Bonita and David got to visit. haven't seen them in a while
• went late night shopping with bae - was supposed to get my new frames but mum went Blacktown. picked up a couple of good sales though

Friday, February 13:

• ooooo Friday the 13th - i thought i went for the whole day without any bad luck - but i dropped and broke a plate at work and i got my monthlies. woo. hoo.
• at least i got to relieve some frustration over tennis and puzzles
• i also got complimented on how good my special hot chocolate was for a customer hehe
• first time watching cissy's friday minto games in a while - worst ref and worst team to lose to

Saturday, February 14:

• Happy Valentines Day!
• got smashed at work again
  • at least we all got out before 5 today
  • Jeric and his water glove hand
  • some customers just complain about the worst things. smh
• went straight home and showered and slept
• woke up to bae at my door with a bouquet of lavender roses ahhhhhhh - he knows how to get to my heart through the littlest of things
  • i'm not a fan of vday but hey, it's still a lovely thing to receive small gifts
• dinner at Green Peppercorn - food babies!!!
  • bumped into Justin and his bae hahaha
• American Sniper to end our date night - dat ending though
• worst period cramps throughout the whole day and night. this is what's gonna keep me up tonight. if it's not that, it's my headache.

Sunday, February 15:

• mass at 11am with the fams followed by Allyson's Christening - cutest Korean-looking baby haha
  • caught up with Gev - he lost sooo much weight haha good on him
• lunch at the Marcelino's residence - ALL the food
• came home and started watching the NBA All-Star Weekend - yayyyyy Steph Curry!!!
• got picked up by A and headed to basketball - versed Tag Team and lost :( oh well
• Green Peppercorn round 2 with the Angeles fams :) always lovely getting along with errbady
• finished the rest of the NBA - Zack Lavine but

Monday, February 16:

• didn't get much sleep again last night - started freaking out about Argentina even though that's still 2 years away
• struggled to get through work today - the struggle of having to put a mask on just so others won't see how you're truly feeling
• the traffic on the way home was the worst too - so glad i didn't take the M4 though or else i would have never gotten home (kidding but seriously, two accidents both on the way home on the M4. laters to errbody else)
• still haven't been able to feel good about myself
• on the bright side, i finally changed my bedsheets and put my clothes away - wooo more space

Tuesday, February 17:

• woke up in the crappiest mood - did nothing the whole day except plan for HH tonight; didn't eat 'til lunchtime and even then it was only a cheese toastie
• got ready and waited for A to go to Mass - so difficult to get through it because of the constant uneven breathes and chest pains
• praise God HH relieved me from the anxiety and allowed me to spend time with them and catch up on each other's lives
• didn't end the night very well when A dropped me home - lost his hard drive and he got anxious about how his stuff always goes missing at my place e.g. his PS2 and games and controller
• updated the Syd West database though - just 'cause it was waaaay overdue

Wednesday, February 18:

• the most semi-spontaneous Ash Wednesday ever
• Wattamolla Beach with the most random crew
  • Bernard, Koreen, Vince, Audrian, Pineda, Michy and Lorraine
  • I kinda wish I didn't have my time of the month, but at the same time I'm glad 'cause I got to take some awesome shots of the waterfall and the rocks and the beach
  • the 'hike' to the look out of beach and ocean was totally worth it
  • played Cards Against Humanity for the first time - such a bad game but it's so great at the same time haha
• Ash Wednesday mass with A and his parents
  • Tito: "you are always welcome to go Mass with us" (so sweet haha)
• HH at the Gales residence
  • Hannah is such a cutie
  • "Mount. SHAOENSHAAN-K (REDEMPTION)" HAHAHAHA
• not the best way to end the night with A but hopefully tomorrow brings a better day

Thursday, February 19:

• another day at work - the drive there was the worst. i felt so terrible from last night. why do i have to be so selfish
• memorial service for Courtney Topic. Wish I was there with the rest of my school mates to be there for Zac and his family
• nothing really exciting happened at work besides giving out fortune cookies with peoples' coffees for CNY - had to be Don's hand model (my arms are sooooo black though lol)
• picked out my new frames with Mumma - wasn't surprised when I found out my eyesight had worsen
• finally got myself some green tea Kit Kats as well!

Friday, February 20:

• what started as the loveliest day became one of my worst nights
• from starting my day with Mass, to ending it in tears and anxiety attacks
• from being surrounded by the best company, to feeling so distant from my own boyfriend
• from having a feast of a breakfast for lunch, to eating close to nothing
• today just made me realise how important my own self worth is and how high my standards used to be and how i've let it slowly diminish. how much i lacked in integrity last year especially.
• i honestly don't know what to do anymore - either way i will get hurt. LOVE. HURTS.

Saturday, February 21:

• what started as a horrible morning/day with me being insecure in bed all day became a lovely night
• highlight of Mass with Fr. Epeli: "when the going gets tough, turn to the angels. they've got you and they're praying for you!"
• finally got to talk things out with A and I'm glad we got to confront each other about the things that worry us most and what make us insecure. i think it's healthy in order for us to grow in this relationship

Sunday, February 22:

• got to watch cissy's reps team play together for the first time :) proud sistaaaah
• last Halo-Halo game of the season :(: - feels good to get a lay-up in hehe too many turnovers though. sozz guys
• learned how to change a flat tyre today haha
• chicken and Maggi noodles for dinner

Monday, February 23:

• longest day of work - was there for over 11 hours, got paid for 7.5 wooo
• at least i got to work on my coffee and made a start of my readings - ew uni
• i'm so not ready to go back. getting anxiety just thinking about it

Tuesday, February 24:

• First day back at uni - wasn't the greatest tbh
• didn't like that i had to pay almost $200 worth of textbooks
• at least i got to see some familiar faces and be with Koreen, even though we're not in the same tutes
• Routine Tuesdays with bae
• dinner at Pho Wetherill with the BFFs and the Sentinas/Planes fams for Tita Lilia's birthday/the Sentina's farewell before they leave for Phills tomorrow

Wednesday, February 25:

• first day of Spanish class!!! - actually so excited, and it's funny hearing all the bogan boys try to speak haha
• had some me time during the first half of my four hour break, ate left over fried rice for lunch, tried to get my Spanish exercise book but turns out it's sold out 'till Friday. wooo time to cram my homework during my 2 hour break
• also knocked out on the UTS couches for a good 20 mins lol
• solid coffee at Another Hideaway before I met up with Koreen, Carmina, Lorraine and Magsino
• 5pm lecture to end the day - pretty boring tbh - at least I don't have it next week woooo early finishes!
• got picked up by bae - had dinner at his, knocked out on his bed while he worked on his essay
• first time watching his Celtics game in agesssss - they should've won that tbh
• teaching bae some basic Spanish hehe - it's fun having a buddy to practice it with :)

Thursday, February 26:

• did nothing but catch up on Jane the Virgin and do some more research and assessments on how my mental health is. needless to say it's not getting any better
• had a feast with beb to celebrate the end of his fourth block at placement! - dat Fatmans mushroom sauce though
• caught up on TWD and watched Gravity to end the night

Friday February 27:

• this morning beat Wednesday morning BY FAR in the worst mornings
• my phone died overnight because i forgot to put it on the charger and ended up missing my first tute of the year for Foundations in International Studies - I now have no idea what happened this week and I'll have to somehow make new friends next week - i hate not having perfect attendance and being absent/late to anything
• good thing mum woke me up or else i would've been screwed
• forgot to bring water, didn't get to shower, missed the earlier train, got blisters from my flats from running for it, forgot my earphones, lost my appetite for the day
• i'm so glad i have so much fun in Spanish class
• and that i got to see bae for the rest of the arvo - his presence always makes me feel better
• but while he's out partying at Ethel's i'm at home trying to be organised for uni
• so not keen for a 7:30 start tomorrow - just gotta think about pay day and dat 9.5 hour Saturday rate

Saturday, February 28:

• last day of summer!!!
• first 7:30-5:30 shift = dead
  • getting smashed morning and lunchtime + work dramas = not thebest ending to the day - so glad i have such great workmates to get through it
• rollercoaster of a night - thank God i have an amazing boyfriend - i love you