—— to you

to love you was the easiest thing i've ever did in my life. you were a ray of sunshine in the middle of so much pain; you were the smallest and cutest thing i was able to see. because in the middle of a crowd you were still shining. your gummy smile, i think, was the first thing that made me fall in love. loving you, however, is the hardest thing i am doing. you're so distant. you don't know who i am. you don't know my name, my age, the problems i struggle with everyday. still, i'm here loving you, min yoongi. and i do know why. in the past few years i believed i'd never be happy [i still think that way, but.]. it was so desmotivating to think i'd never smile brightly because i was truly happy, you know? but listening to your mixtape i felt that, yes, maybe that's possible. maybe someday i can overcome my depression and my social anxiety. maybe someday i can be happy and plus: make someone happy too. i love you so much, min yoongi, you are an angel to me. you are a person with flaws, fears and weaknesses but you still manage to be the most incredible person i know. and i love you so, so much for this. you inspire me so fucking much. i hope you'll still be happy in the future of the future of the future. you deserve it, and i'll be here staying with you even if you aren't that happy. if you are sad or stressed i'll find a way to make you overcome those. because i love you, y'know? you helped me so much. i hope someday i can make you feel the way i felt for so long.

i love you, min yoongi. i love you with all my fucking weak heart.