So Phil had to get contacts, and I went with him to Lenscrafters so I could get a ride home. While waiting I heard a conversation in the room next to me where a guy was trying contacts for the first time in his life. I thought it was pretty funny and luckily I had my computer out, so I typed in the conversation. I also typed Phil's with the same woman, which wasn't nearly as funny because it wasn't so ambiguous unless I hadn't heard the words I put in brackets:
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LADY: Come on Phil, right here. Make sure to wash your hands. There’s a definite right and left. You mess it up and you’ll immediately know there’s something wrong.
LADY: So how big’s your [graduating class]?
PHIL: I think 64
LADY: That’s pretty big!
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First conversation (not so specific, so more open to interpretation):
LADY: How you doing; did you get it in?
LADY: I don’t know is it in?
LADY: I think it’s in your eyes (giggles). Just open your eyes and you should get it right in. Go straight in and then press hard to get it off.
MAN: Did I get it?
LADY: It’s in your eye!
MAN: It feels funny…kind of hurts a little bit. Is that all?
LADY: Now you have to take it out. It’s stuck in there right now.
--they left room, presumably to wash hands, and then returned to same room a minute later--
LADY: Now to take it out, just use the same maneuver you used to put it in. It can be kinda awkward, but just press down and grab it, give it a little squeeze, and it should come right out.
MAN: It keeps slipping out of my fingers.
LADY: Yes, you need to make sure you get your fingers around it, and—there you go; you got it out!
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I never realized how hard it is to type while laughing until today.