↳ October

• 1/10/18: feeling crap, gardening, daisy caught a rat, seeing poppy in the driveway/her rolling over and being cute, pretty sunset.
• 2/10/18: arranging h&m order return, tidying my room, gardening, LOST, asmr.
• 3/10/18: up at 7am, waiting for knock on the door to send my parcel back, editing, walk around the lake, tired.
• 4/10/18: tired, b&m, walk around the lake, taking lots of autumn photos, daisy fell asleep on me in the evening.
• 5/10/18: tired, laundry, in the garden with rosie, daisy fell asleep on my lap in the evening, daisy sat on a chair by herself for the first time.
• 6/10/18: raining all day, rosie & daisy were in the lounge together, sainsburys, nuts, daisy settled down and went to sleep in a bed for the first time.
• 7/10/18: daisy still in bed when I went downstairs in the morning, bored, music playlists, organizing pc files
• 8/10/18: found a feather on the stairs/from jasper, period pain, in bed all day, naps, youtube.
• 9/10/18: still not feeling good, scorpio playlist, ohio is for emo kids nostalgia song, laughing in the DMs w/ scorpio twin boi,
• 10/10/18: youtube comments, 23*c, laundry, nice twitter replies for world mental health day, laughing in the DMs
• 11/10/18: unmotivated, did a bit of cleaning upstairs, youtube,
• 12/10/18: smelt jasper's scent for the first time in months, walk around the lake, windy, loling in the DMs on twitter with scorpio boi, went to bed really late.
• 13/10/18: astrolgoy memes/threads, DMS lol, making scorpio memes, tesco, humid, ads parodies
• 14/10/18: jasper dream, raining all day, sorting out nan's house, diaries, went to bed really late.
• 15/10/18: tired, bored, scanning photos, went to bed really late.
• 16/10/18: insta DMs, youtube, LOST, birth charts, went to bed really late againnnn.
• 17/10/18: lazy, vlogging about astrology, editing, DMs, tired.
• 18/10/18: B&M, gardening, youtube, scorpio memes
• 19/10/18: saw the cat that looks like jasper's brother in our front garden, cleaning stuff outside, baby gender reveal/upset, DMS, editing.
• 20/10/18: tired, donuts, astrology, editing.
• 21/10/18: tired, reading dad's birth chart and more about mine, editing,
• 22/10/18: editing, scorpio memes/posts, talking on twitter, loki asmr, went to bed late.
• 23/10/18: scorpio season is here!, scorpio playlist all day, snapchat, walk around the lake, pretty sunset.
• 24/10/18: tesco by myself, hiding from k's mum!, cookies, michael from red liked my tweet!.
• 25/10/18: arguing with g/blocked her, angry, B&M, got xmas present tribute for jasper, LOST.
• 26/10/18: walk around the lake, variety of birds, insta DMs
• 27/10/18: cold, sainsburys, donuts,
• 28/10/18: clocks went back, nap, not feeling great/fatigued, LOST
• 29/10/18: still not feeling 100% normal, cold, gardening, twitter likes will be removed news? :(
• 30/10/18: cold, first time wearing a scarf and gloves this eason, walk around the lake, goldcrests, looking through old twitter likes, daisy being cute on me and mum
• 31/10/18: B&M, gardening in the front garden, jasper won a place in the lovecatsworld 2019 calendar!, slender man

↳ November

• 1/11/18: cold, raining, cleaning my room, got my first birthday card & present (from ben)
• 2/11/18: dyeing my hair, kerrang, really cold, in the garden with rosie, first sunset walk of the season.
• 3/11/18: pre period pains, kerrang, rosie eating kitten food, red saw my insta story and put it in their story!!!!!!!!!!, daisy going mad with ball toy.
• 4/11/18: period pains, naps, in bed all day, music
• 5/11/18: cute dream, feeling better, youtube, upset about my birthday
• 6/11/18: walk around the lake and in the woods, lots of birds, feeling sad about my birthday/growing up, LOST, headache.
• 7/11/18: dusting, cleaning the bathroom, LOST, mum upset me about my birthday again
• 8/11/18: tesco by myself/getting stuff for my cake, getting my birthday cake from sainsburys, LOST
• 9/11/18: cute wrapping paper, mix of some rain and sunshine, lunch at the red lion,
• 10/11/18: tired, kerrang, lots of rain, got birthday card from dad, presents from fiona
• 11/11/18: tired, sorting out nan's house, looking through/photographing nan's art,
• 12/11/18: kerrang, writing & researching nan's family history, pretty clouds and moon at sunset, watching a red concert on youtube,
• 13/11/18: kerrang, clearing out & organizing letters and papers in the kitchen and lounge, tesco, researching waghorns in nan's family,
• 14/11/18: talking to alison on fb about family history, clearing out & organizing letters and papers in the lounge, got the 2019 calendar that jaspers' in in the post, walk around the lake at sunset, pink clouds.
• 15/11/18: B&M, clearing out the lounge, kerrang, unexpected pretty sunset, walk around the lake before dark, LOST finale
• 16/11/18: grey all day, tired, lazy, rosie sleeping by me in the evening
• 17/11/18: headache, nap, poppy visited (came in our garden but daisy scared her off), pretty orange sunset, leonid meteor shower/saw meteors for the first time ever!!/sat in the garden from 1am-4am.
• 18/11/18: went to bed at 4.30am, gardening in the front garden, talking on twitter, starset, sitting in the garden from 12.30-2am - saw 3 more meteors
• 19/11/18: tired, asmr, walk around the lake at sunset, talking on twitter, fluffy writing.
• 20/11/18: lazy, red, grey all day, went to bed too late as usual, fluffy mood.
• 21/11/18: really tired, tidying up my clothes, walk around the lake at sunset,
• 22/11/18: tidying up the lounge/decluttering, recycling, red, organizing my youtube subscriptions,
• 23/11/18: tired, got phone sd card in the post from daniel, avengers infinity war, DMs
• 24/11/18: h&m order arrived, decluttering the lounge, donuts, youtube, astrology
• 25/11/18: tired, h&m order arrived, watching concerts on youtube, LOST extras,
• 26/11/18: tidying my room, walk around the lake and in the woods at sunset, unusual birds, ordering a christmas tree decoration in memory of jasper, LOST extras.
• 27/11/18: tired, cold, clearing out & tidying up the candles and balloons and the food cupboard, youtube,
• 28/11/18: b&m, s&c vids on youtube, found out g blocked & deleted me/agnry/upset, relapsed,
• 29/11/18: didn't sleep much, tesco by myself, windy, cookies, daisy climbing around, youutube, talking to tasha on fb
• 30/11/18: walk in the woods and around the lake at sunset, muntjac deer, youtube, saw the international space station go across the sky

↳ December

• 1/12/18: tesco, cookies,
• 2/12/18: cool clouds, drowsy, youtube,
• 3/12/18: unexpected time home alone, cookies, youtube, watching the international space station fly over,
• 4/12/18: period pain, in bed all day, dad texted me,
• 5/12/18: feeling better, laundry, youtube, replied to dad/annoyed,
• 6/12/18: jasper dream, spotify 2018 wrapped, went to sleep really late
• 7/12/18: anxiety, cleaning the smaller scratching post, walk around the lake at sunset, watching the international space station & spacex dragon go across the sky, talking to fiona on the phone.
• 8/12/18: anxiety, dustin bates liked my instagram post!!!!!!!!!!, sainsburys, cookies,
• 9/12/18: church remembrance service, seeing nan's brother's name on the wall,
• 10/12/18: tired, anxiety, bored, youtube, feeling depressed/couldn't sleep til late.
• 11/12/18: walk around the lake, got xmas decoration for nan in the post, halsey - without me remix, messing around the voice recordings on insta DMs, watching the international space station go across the sky.
• 12/12/18: anxiety, tired, tidying my room, dusting, stargazing.
• 13/12/18: b&m, freezing cold, red crescent moon, loling in insta DMs, geminid meteor shower (saw 3 clearly, 2 through clouds).
• 14/12/18: bird in the bathroom when I woke up!!!!!!!, made fairy cakes for jasper's 6 month anniversary, wrapping up fiona's presents, tesco, achy legs.
• 15/12/18: freezing cold, raining all day, nan's house- sorting out photographs from upstairs, finding out more family history,
• 16/12/18: tired, junk food, breaking benjamin, sad/anxious about money, tumblr.
• 17/12/18: went with mum to hospital for her blood test, garden centre,
• 18/12/18: putting up the christmas tree, daisy playing in the christmas tree box, kerrang, scanning in photos, went to sleep really late.
• 19/12/18: insta DMs & voice messages, finding jasper's fur on me, good charlotte, peter rabbit, voice mesages on insta til 3am
• 20/12/18: tired, tesco by myself, a quiet place, insta DMs
• 21/12/18: tired, making cupcakes, messy, christopher robin, robin singing outside my window when I went to bed
• 22/12/18: kerrang, playing with daisy, wrapping up rosie's and daisy's presents, cleaning downstairs, robin singing outside my window again.
• 23/12/18: crazy busy sainsburys, got a christmas plant for nan, cookies, elf, smelt jasper's scent.
• chrismtas eve: upset, sunny, cemetery, walk by the lake, insta DMs.
• christmas: grey all day, sneezing/runny nose, upset, woodpecker in the garden, daisy loved her card and playing the wrapping paper,
• boxing day: woken up by a fox at 4am, headache/slept in late, crossword with mum, sorting out some of my presents, the first purge.
• 27/12/18: laundry, deleting photos on flickr, walk around the lake, bird box, brain on fire.
• 28/12/18: deleting photos on flickr, tesco, popcorn, how it ends
• 29/12/18: spotify premium, writing about months this year, organizing pc files, boring films, upset.
• 30/12/18: playing with daisy, organizing pc files, guardians of the galaxy vol 2, roast dinner, upset.
• 31/12/18: heard a blackbird and thrush for the first time since spring (when I was putting the trash out @ 5am), poppy visited, drive in the dark/spotify, upset/relieved, watching fireworks out the window.

2019

January

• 1/1/19: headache, rosie went outside, instagram likes, pre-period pains
• 2/1/19: headache, you (netflix tv series), pre-period pains, mum had her operation/visiting her in hospital, late dinner. whatsapp
• 3/1/18: b&m, making fairy cakes for nan's birthday, 21p - the hype, netflix you, daisy sleeping on the sofa. nearly painless peerod
• 4/1/18: period pain, cleaning, mum came home from hospital, you (netflix). whatsapp, insta
• 5/1/18: tired, tesco by myself, playing with daisy, watching YOU edits on yt
• 6/1/18: tired, astrology, making fairy cakes, DMs,
• 7/1/18: b&m, astrology, home alone for a bit, taking the christmas tree down, insta DMs.
• 8/1/19: sunny, walk around the lake, light headed/in a daze, astrology/solar return, youtube.
• 9/1/19: tesco by myself, chocolate peanuts, drive to gerrards cross, youtube, twitter
• 10/1/19: youtube, walked to the postbox, astrology, went to sleep late
• 11/1/19: went with mum to her hospital appointment, tesco, white choco mini eggs, tired, fawlty towers.
• 12/1/19: stand atlantic, astrology, fawlty towers, insta DMs talking, went to sleep really late
• 13/1/19: astrology/aspects, finding dory soundtrack, insta DMs, in a daze, asmr.
• 14/1/19: playing with daisy, laundry, car tyres, twitter, astrology- other people's birth charts.
• 15/1/19: tired, astrology, listening to my teenage music, rosie sat on her bed for a bit,
• 16/1/19: tesco by myself, listening to teenage music, selfies with rosie, fawlty towers, pretty moon.
• 17/1/19: clearing out a bit of the hallway, listening to my teenage music, twitter, wholesome memes, asmr.
• 18/1/19: papa roach's new album, b&m, in the garden with rosie, listening to my teenage music, fawlty towers.
• 19/1/19: listening to my teenage music, tesco, pissed off/upset, point north (band), insta DMs.
• 20/1/19: headache/slept in til 1pm, youtube, a series of unfortunate events (netflix), insta DMs til 2am, asmr.
• 21/1/19: watching the super blood wolf moon eclipse @ 4am/5am, netflix, insta DMs, a series of unfortunate events, cold.
• 22/1/19: a series of unfortunate events, snow,
• 23/1/19: b&m, got a fatball bird feeder, biscuits, tidying my room, a series of unfortunate events.
• 24/1/19: cold, dusting, did a bit of clearing out, a series of unfortunate events + finale,
• 25/1/19: tesco by myself, milder weather, cleaning & clearing out the kitchen, insta DMs talking til 2am
• 26/1/19: headache, really tired, insta chat,
• 26/1/19: h&m order, found out uni is being changed into a retirement place
• 27/1/19: the witches, sainsburys, cookies, reading the documents for the pub to flats plan, writing draft.
• 28/1/19: sunny, RSPB garden bird watch, chaffinch in our garden, writing & submitting comments about pub flats, cake.
• 29/1/19: b&m, chaffinch came back to our garden, long tailed tits in our garden for the first time ever!, clearing out the kitchen,
• 30/1/19: cleaning, talking to dad on whatsapp
• 31/1/19: bit of clearing out, talking to dad on whatsapp, pretty little liars rewatch, insta DMs, snow.

↳ February

• 1/2/19: walking in the snow around the lake and in the woods, egrets, b&m, achy ankles, PLL.
• 2/2/19: new music, PLL, within temptation, youtube
• 3/2/19: PLL, resting in bed/period pain, asmr, insta DMs, uwu memes.
• 4/2/19: insta DMs, new music, PLL
• 5/2/19: walk around the lake, long tailed tits, tesco, PLL, insta DMs 'til 3am.
• 6/2/19: cleaning my room, PLL, insta DMs
• 7/2/19: b&m, milk cat yoghurt treats, walk around the lake, long tailed tits, PLL.
• 8/2/19: lazy, feeling kinda crappy, PLL, pretty clouds after storm, insta DMs.
• 9/2/19: windy, sainsburys, too much junk food, PLL, looking at clothes online
• 10/2/19: swrils, organizing h&m return
• 11/2/19: h&m return, sitting in the garden with daisy, PLL, upset/anxiety
• 12/1/19: youtube, insta DMs, astrology synnastry charts & doms,
• 13/1/19: b&m, looking at flowers, cleaning my shoes, nan's will, insta DMs.
• 14/1/19: clearing out, larundry, uwu memes, painting my birth chart, insta
• 15/1/19: walk around the lake and in the woods, snowdrops, mild, PLL
• 16/1/19: feeling insecure/crappy, tidying up my clothes, tesco, chocolate peanuts, PLL.
• 17/2/19: clearing out old stationary, starling on the bird feeder, PLL, insta DMs.
• 18/2/19: PLL, talking with D until 2am.
• 19/2/19: PLL, gardening (tidying up the soil area), insta DMs, kidnap (netflix).
• 20/2/19: b&m, roses in the back garden are out!, got another bird feeder, PLL, animal chocolate biscuits.
• 21/2/19: organizing old books, cleaning cat toys, rosie pushing around a ping pong ball, laundry
• 22/2/19: starlings on the bird feeder, gardening,
• 23/2/19: cleaning the kitchen, sainsburys, junk food, insta DMs
• 24/2/19: woke up to dawn chorus, warm, gardening for 3 hours, youtube, rosie enjoying catnip toy.
• 25/2/19: 19c, clearing out nan's house, bringing the diaries home, feeling kinda crappy
• 26/2/19: got up early, rooks, charity shop, clearing out nan's house, finding money, warm & sunny.
• 27/2/19: laundry, labelling diaries from nan's house, walk around the lake, last day of the heatwave (19c), achy feet.
• 28/2/19: groggy, clearing out the back bedroom & kitchen cupboard above the washing machine, rain, going to iain's new house, happy death day.
• 1/3/19: groggy, feeling depressed/insecure/anxious/lonely, rosie went outside twice & tried to eat bread I put out for the birds!, unmotivated, fantastic bests
• 2/3/19: feeling depressed, unmotivated, tesco, fantastic beasts
• 3/3/19: depressed.
• 4/3/19: depressed.
• 5/3/19: feeling better than last few days, anxiety, period pain
• 6/3/19: emily was born, period pain/in bed most the day, anxiety, feeling shit again, talking to dan in the evening, tarot livestream
• 7/3/19: talking to dan all day/deep chat at night, listening to music all day, funny news interviews, feeling a lot better, windy
• 8/3/19: creepy answer machine message, listening to music all day, laundry, writing, insta voice DMs until 2.30am
• 9/3/19: sainsburys, andy black - ghost of ohio, pink bras, russian doll, insta DMs until 4am.
• 10/3/19: -- 16/3/19: depressed & anxious
• 17/3/19: PLL, anxiety, talking to dan in the evening
• 18/3/19: h&m order, organizing followers, PLL
• 19/3/19: talkking to dan on twitter & isnta,

----

• 19/6/19: daisy missing all day, searching for her by the lake/woods/canal, strained legs, finding daisy in the end house's garage!, talking to dan until 3am.
• 20/6/19: bored, liar liar
• 21/6/19: car mechanics, short walk in the woods, co-op in iver, sausage rolls & dougnuts, talking to dan until 3am.
• 22/6/19: h&m delivery crap, sainsburys, strained arm & legs/limping, sausage rolls, feeling apathetic and bored.
• 30/6/19: refund, seeing dad etc, insta Dms
• 1/7/19:__ tesco in gerrards cross, lucifer, insta chat w D for 8 hours, laughing,
• 2/7/19: b&m, lucifer, anxiety,
• 4/7/19: feeling a lot better, talking to D most the day, lucifer, went to sleep late,
• 5/7/19: dyeing my hair,
• 8/7/19: low self-esteem, cemetery, co-op in iver, lucifer
• 9/7/19: walk around the lake, tired, talking to dan in the afternoon/evening, lucifer
• 10/7/19: talking to dan for 3 hours in the afternoon, sorting out my clothes, laundry, lucifer
• 11/7/19: sorting out my clothes, clearing out jasper's bed, recycling, lucifer
• 12/7/19: cleaning jaspers bed, gardening, nap, lucifer,
• 13/7/19: tired, sitting in the garden, mini donuts, lucifer, jupiter next to the moon.
• 14/7/19: talking to dan, triggered, upset/depressed
• 15/7/19: period pain, in bed most the day, lucifer
• 16/7/19: anxiety, depressed, lucifer,
• 19/7/19: b&m, drenched in the rain, through fire -- all animal album, talking to dan about friendship/insecurities/meaning etc until 2am.
• 23/7/19: cleaning the bathroom, daisy hearing rock music for the first time/running away, crazy lightning thunderstorm, talking to dan until 3am.
• 27/7/19: playsuit, lucifer, daisy scaring me, "i love you chloe", talking to dan until 2.30am.
• 28/7/19: extra day home alone, tired, bored, lucifer
• 29/7/19: anxiety, lucifer, talking to dan, chip shop
• 30/7/19: long tailed tits in our garden, talking to dan, sainsburys, lucifer
• 31/7/19: tired, organizing dvds downstairs, talking to dan about movies
• 1/8/19: walk around the lake, organizing dvds downstairs, anxiety, lucifer,
• 2/8/19: b&m, upset, gardening,
• 3/8/19: got up early, walk around the lake, anxiety, gardening,
• 4/8/19: writing, talking to dan on insta and whatsapp, sitting in the garden, sweeping the garden, long tailed tits, went to bed early
• 5/8/19: pre-period pain, smiths garden centre/looking at flowers/getting new garden gloves, cemetery, picrew
• 6/8/19: got up early, nap, gardening, talking to dan in the afternoon, pre-period pain.
• 7/8/19: watching lots of birds in the garden in the morning, tidying my room,
• 8/8/19: pre-period pain, sad/anxious/pissed off about email regarding nan's house, talking to dan pretty much all day, lucifer
• 9/8/19: pre-period pain, sad,
• 10/8/19: pre-period pain, kerrang, making jasper's memorial frame, dan making me smile/laugh, saw 1 meteor after midnight.
• 11/8/19: period pain, going to nan's house for the last time/bringing more stuff home, pretty big clouds, talking to dan a bit, went to bed early.
• 12/8/19: tired, papa roach, perseid meteor shower 11pm-1am (saw 7 meteors), cold.
• 13/8/19: groggy, laundry, sorting through some of the papers from nan's house, scanning in stuff relating to nan, organizing pc files.
• 14/8/19: chilly, h&m orders arrived, talking to dan on tumblr, papa roach replied to me on insta,
• 15/8/19: daisy playing with a ping pong ball outside, laundry, nap, new starset song,
• __16/8/19:__b&m, chilly, talking to dan in the early evening/him saying he feels the same about me with feeling bad about not being able to "help" each other feel better, lucifer
• 17/8/19: laundry, tired,
• 18/8/19: a day to remember, organizing asmr playlist, talking to dan until 2am.
• 19/8/19: pyjama day, anxiety, phone update, youtube
• 20/8/19: blue tits on the roof/window, feeling lazy, cleaning cat toys, organizing phone files, youtube.
• 21/8/19: lazy, talking to dan in the morning/afternoon/cloud pics, sitting in the garden, daisy playing with toy mice, insta chat with new mutal.
• 22/8/19: cleaning my room, lucifer
• 23/8/19: pretty dark blue starry sky @ 5am, lazy, hot, lucifer
• 24/8/19: hot, nap, sitting in the garden,
• 25/8/19: hot, talking to dan, nap, sitting outside, finished lucifer season 4.
• 26/8/19: hot, sitting outside in the evening, concerts on youtube, stranger things 3, talking to dan until I fell asleep.
• 27/8/19: hot, talking to dan in the afternoon/bit of the evening, annoyed, stranger things.
• 28/8/19: stranger things.
• 29/8/19: fatigued af, naps, stranger things.