roger

• lanky 18 year old 6 foot taiwanese lolicon and pro table tennis player who 14 year old me met while helping with a friend's film project. we played each other's love interests.
• developed a crush on him while filming and he knew.
• favorite anime character was holo from spice and wolf. a 5000 year old deity who took the form of a 15 year old wolf girl.
• nonconsensual first kiss. the group had dinner to celebrate my birthday and when the others left, he had me go over to his apartment so "i don't have to wait for my ride alone at night".
• touched me. wanted me to give him a handjob. made comments on how he preferred girls to have no hair. said i had sexy collarbones.
• friends with benefits for about a month and then ghosted me.
• wore noir from bath and body works.

alison

• 17 year old 5 foot 1 filipina who was recently broken up with by some asshole film buff. lara's former girlfriend. wore wire cat ears that she made herself everyday. theater kid. taurus.
• saw 15 year old me frequenting the school cafeteria where she worked. we met on miitomo, the mobile app for nintendo's tomodachi franchise.
• L paired me up with her for shits and giggles. she asked me out on facebook messenger. bought her spam musubi as a sign of my devotion to her. watched the short play she directed. she kissed my cheek after my chinese club performance and left a lipstick mark that i didn't take off until nighttime.
• broke up with me after a month, saying she "wasn't feeling it, mr. krabs". i was devestated.
• had a brief fling with her during junior year when we started talking again and i realized she had fallen in love with me and was heartbroken after i started dating L. ghosted her because i didn't know how to handle open relationships.
• pretty sure her current partner is a dem soc

lara

• infamous ex. 5 foot 5 viet/chinese social outcast. invested in bitcoin in high school, massive economics enthusiast. subscribed to the economist. dream career was to work for the federal reserve.
• anger issues, history of being physically abusive to younger brothers, adhd, anxiety. had a different hyperfixation every month that i continued to feel ostracized by.
• secretly liked me because i was the first person to have treated them with unjudging compassion. i secretly liked them because they didn't judge me for being bisexual or for having been taken advantage of by roger. hooked up with me 2 months after alison broke up with me.
• touched me immediately after i confessed to them. waterboarded me one week into us dating.
• moderated r/neoliberal. only talked about the subreddit and neoliberalism. told them i felt lonely and like an afterthought. it did nothing. in hindsight, this was definitely a hyperfixation they had.
• obsessed with interacting with leftists online in attempt to convince them that neoliberalism was ethical. commissioned bao (@brutalist_house) to draw a portrait of me.
• several instances of emotional/physical infidelity. conveniently "forgot" to tell me that they hooked up with a friend.
• only wore old t-shirts and polos until i picked out and bought clothes for them.
• had to teach them to thank the cashier at the drive thru window. kicked some middle schooler on the floor for blocking the hallway.
• got me into weed. and snl. and white people music.
• bought me a gravity blanket and a nintendo switch near the end of our relationship as some kind of an apology. i gave both to vienna. i gave alfredo the wacom tablet they gave me.
• were each other's firsts. only had sex twice. it sucked both times. every sexual encounter sucked with them.
• constantly asked for sexual favors. really adamant about eating me out. it sucked.
• i took care of their brothers better than they did. their mom loved me to pieces. i still have the chinese clay mug she gifted me for no reason. wish i spoke to her more.
• realized they were trans 3 months before i broke up with them. told me they may have dated me because i represented a model of femininity that they aspired to. disregarded my asexual and nonbinary identities. i wonder if it's because me being sexual and feminine was something they needed to cope.

luca

• 21 year old italian ucla astrophysics student i met at a house party in venice (california lol). had a pink buzz cut and big brown eyes
• drink of choice was sapporo beer and gave me the rest of his can at the party
• really liked rock climbing. took me to cliffs of id as a first hangout
• had a cat named kubo
• was either on adderall, weed, or some combination of psychoactive drugs at all times
• i realized he was asexual when he was very reluctant to do penetrative. started describing how disconnected he was from sex and how he actually doesn't enjoy it. related to my experiences with being asexual a lot, about how it's like a chess game where if you make the right moves, something good happens. this conversation devastated him because since i showed him what it felt like to be able to decline sex, he's going to continuously decline sex from now on and that ruined his plan of just continuing to be really good at sex and just finding someone he liked and settling with the fact that most people want sex
• got him back into bojack horseman