𝒆𝒕𝒊𝒒𝒖𝒆𝒕𝒕𝒆 ..

introduce people who do not know one another · apologize without making an excuse out of the apology · acknowledge kindness rather than treating it as expected · return borrowed things promptly and in good condition · never arrive empty-handed when invited for a special occasion · knock before entering a closed room · respect another person's privacy even when there is nothing to hide · ask before borrowing or touching personal belongings · never open a drawer, cupboard, letter, notebook, or parcel that is not yours · leave a room as pleasant as you found it · treat another person's home according to their customs · offer guests something to drink · see guests to the door when they leave · make a guest's bed and room welcoming before they arrive · answer personal letters with care · acknowledge invitations rather than leaving them unanswered · write condolences rather than searching for perfect words · keep an address book · remember important occasions · keep private things told in confidence private · dress with consideration for the occasion · remove outdoor things when settling indoors · take care with one's appearance even when fashion is unimportant · avoid making another person feel underdressed · compliment without comparing · receive a compliment without arguing against it · never point out a harmless imperfection in someone's appearance · put away distractions during a shared meal · offer the nicest portion rather than automatically taking it · pass things rather than reaching across someone · serve guests before oneself · make enough that an unexpected person could be welcomed · do not hurry someone who eats slowly · help clear the table when appropriate · treat an ordinary shared meal as worthy of attention · arrive when you said you would · warn someone when you will be late · do not make urgency contagious · allow other people time to answer · avoid interrupting · listen without preparing your reply · do not demand immediate access to another person's attention · ask before making a telephone call when a message will do · keep unnecessary noise to oneself · lower one's voice in peaceful places · let silence remain when it is comfortable · do not embarrass someone for not knowing something · correct gently when correction is truly necessary · praise in company and discuss delicate matters privately · do not make someone's mistake into entertainment · avoid questions that require another person to reveal more than they wish · never insist after a polite refusal · make room for quieter people without putting them conspicuously on the spot · disagree without becoming unkind · speak of absent people as though they might enter the room · write down recipes worth passing on · offer food without pressuring someone to eat it · ask before altering something with sentimental history · return objects to their proper places · leave useful things ready for the next person · care for shared things especially well · ask before picking flowers from someone else's garden · leave wildflowers where they grow when picking would diminish the place · do not disturb nests or small creatures merely for a closer look · return stones, logs, and little habitats gently after looking beneath them · walk softly where something is living · admire without needing to possess · learn the customs of a place before entering it · leave a path, picnic place, or garden no worse for having visited · wrap presents with care · include a little note with a meaningful gift · never apologize for a handmade present · remember that the thoughtfulness of a gift matters more than its price · do not announce what a gift cost · receive even a modest gift graciously · use beautiful things rather than saving them forever · preserve cards and letters that matter · return kindness in one's own way rather than treating affection like a debt · announce oneself rather than appearing unexpectedly · do not overstay a visit · make departures warm but not unnecessarily prolonged · offer someone the more comfortable seat · hold doors without making a ceremony of it · help when one's hands are free · include the person standing slightly outside the conversation · do not whisper secrets in company · notice who has been forgotten · keep promises, including little ones · ask before sharing photographs of someone · do not turn every kindness into something that must be reciprocated · allow people their peculiarities