- listen. my mom's been making me feel like shit lately. i can say some inocent setence for here just bc i want her to listen. and she will throw some shit at me. this is recorrent and she made me feel stupid today. i'm also in a terrible mood ; my period is coming. and tomorroww is sunday wow i cant wait.....
- i saw joe alwyn today and discovered some stuff about him. i do not think i have a crush on him anymore. still open to friendships tho. i also dont feel like going out on friday. i just do not want to. ugh. why does everything seems so disgusting. everything.
- monday is gonna be great tho. imma get to spend some good amount of money and buy stuff ive been wanting to buy for ages. just the thoght of the packaging coming already makes my crippling depression go away. i also feel like i need to try out new things when it comes to style., but it takews time and energy. i think i have everything i need on my wardrobre but skirts. i also lost a bit of weight. which makes me sooo happy. today i saw a newjeans live and it was an experience. theyre everything i aim to be rn. skinny and pretty hair basically. i also feel like i need to be smarter but i dont think if i can to be honst. i also wonder if joe alwyn wants to be my friend. a lot .. at this point i am certainly obsessed by him. he seems to be a very nice person i just hope hes not cocky.
- today i feel alone. every thing annoys me . i dont feel like watching a movie, tv show, drawing, none of that. not even talking to my friends. im truly just rooting for the time to passs faster than it does. and also recieve my best friend next weekk. and drink.
- i think i ate way to much rn. i put a lot of food on my plate. but its okay cause i ate well this week. and my period is coming which means imma lose a little weight as well.
- i tried a brazilziancore shirt today and it was so cute on me. i looked amazing. my hair was also cool. i tried to do some new hairstyle using hairsticks. looks casual and fun. also a little sexy..; i cant wait for my hair to grow lmao !!@ it looks depressing btw. no shine, the tips are breaking off. and its dry as fuck. im gonna invest in hair masks.
- yes, i do care a lot about superficial stuff. wont try to change who i am. i have severeal self esteem issues. i know exactly why. i hope someday it changes. phisically. cant even write it here tbh. just the thought of someone reading this makes me sick. it wont happen anyways. ill make sure of it .
- i also realized today that the people from the north do not apprecciate me. which is fine. i dont appreciatte them either.
- the truth is, i need a friend i can trust. i need someone i can depend on, emotionally. dont really care if its a male or female friend. i just want somebody i can have some fun with. thats all i ask God for. and also a job.
- dude, i hope my dad likes the scrapbook ive made for him. parents never seem impressed by anything actually. i think ill make it when i finally get a job, but its gonna take a while. and its also terrible not to compare my life to others.
- when i recieve my money, i needd to buy a new matress asap. and fix my notebook.
- today ive completed some stupid quiz since im gonna have to work in the elections. i have no idea of what day it is lmao. its gonna take so much time. but God knows what it does.
- my letter> dear Father, i know it's been a while since i've truly spoken to you, and when i do, is to ask for things. but i want to say thank you. for everything you give me. which is too much. thank you. truly blessed. i also would like to ask you for a friend. thats all.
- my issue is... i dont want to sound like a pick me girl but a male friend is a little bit less drama. theres just no competiition around u. but the cons are the inability to do girls stuff. which i really like. but i really wanted to feel the experience of having a guy friend that is not in love with me. i mean, he ccan be in love with me,. but he cannot tell me. it ruins everything. i do not want to type anymore.
aug 20 2022 ∞
aug 20 2022 +