- when you want to actually help, replace "i don't know what to do" with "what do you need right now?"
- don't make assumptions. listen to what people tell you, and ask if you're unsure
- boundaries aren't a turnstile for you to hop. if you want to get through them, you have to earn it. even then, focus on what's put on your side of the wall instead of brute forcing toward what YOU want
- stay equal. make an effort to be. treat others like their input matters
- if you interrupt someone, circle back to what they were saying and genuinely engage with it.
- don't make every mistake about your own guilt. tripping over your feet further doesn't help you learn, and it makes the other person feel like they have to pick you back up and set you right
- fucking write things down if you have to. it's worth it to remember
- don't project your wants, needs, ideals, goals, etc onto another person.
- it's not a race. it's not a competition. work together.
- learn the difference between play and reality, or else you can and will hurt people
- explanations and excuses are different. acknowledge the wrongdoing, understand the impact, then you can explain your reasoning / the root cause. don't brush things off, or refuse to discuss them entirely.
- give people space when they need it. ask if they want space or company. someone else wanting space isn't a moral failing on anyone's part
- respect and utilize preferred means of communication. if you can manage it, you should at least try. accomodations can always be made and it shows others that you're willing to be on their level
jan 3 2026 ∞
jan 3 2026 +
