-brierheart/blair witch-y ritual shit

• get lost in wood < get napped < someone ends up on a stone slab with a root in their chest
• 'heart of thorn, bones of the wild, in life, forsworn, rise from death, blood of our blood'
• bfu (ofc); 'this week on bfu:us we gonna do a series first: overnight in the woods!" 'oh i love camping'
• exploring around in the woods for some... witchy myth. ryan finds a hare, locks eyes with it, freaks out afterwards when shane catches up like 'WE GOTTA GO"
• shanes like wut why its just a rabbit, nd ryans like I FUCIN HEARD IT IN MY HEAD MAN
• try to leave woods, cant make it out before dark bc they deep in there. ryans freakin, shanes tryina placate, eventually they both fall asleep. shane wakes up in the middle of the night with the tent flap open; notices ryans feet are hanging out
• (going very wendigo on this one)
• goes to pull ryans feet back in and do up the tentfront but pauses when he sees the same hare from before sittin starin in at them
• ryan wakes up with a gasp or crying or something and is BEYOND THE POINT OF BEING CALMED and he is just FLIPPIN MAD SHIT
• he locks eyes with the hare eventually and just. immediate stop. shanes scared now at this point bc ryans never done this before
• sittin back bc ryan was thrashing, notices ryans going for the tent opening, tries to call him back but freezes when a pair of hands creeeeeeeeep into the periphery through the tent flap, caressing ryans face sooooothingly
• ryan leaves tent and then ZOOOOOM gone; whisked away baby witch style
• shane goes after him, cant find him immediately, stumbles upon briarheart ritual. witnesses ryan on a rock slab, bloodied, chest open, heart in a bowl, and the witch puttin the briar in him
• blacks out or something? wakes up in tent, ryan beside him breathing, like whew what a weird dream
• they go to leave ryans normal acting, shanes still edged out on it tho, and as they leave woods he sees a hare followin after them
• askin ryan if hes okay and then.... idk some shock ending

-bfu revisiting goatman

• starts off normal; FOUR crewmembers enter
• antagonize goatman, nothing happens, they leave with FIVE crewmembers but dont realize it bc the fifth is familiar but in that offhand, kinda vague memory sorta way
• they walk back to their car, fifth is sort of straggling, being sort of weird but nothing too... weird
• all strapped in car heading down highway back to hq or something when shane realizes that there was an open middle seat on the drive over, and now the middle seat between him and ryan is occupied
• oh fuck what
• tries to play it cool, side-glances to goatman and goatman is side-eyeing back with a biiiiiiiig creepy grin
• IMMEDIATELY OH FUCK
• texts ryan, pretends to be real casual but hes breaking out in a sweat; 'be calm ryan i need u to not make a scene but can you tell me who were sitting beside'
• RYANS LIKE OH FUCK WHAST THE FUCK IS THAT
• BE COOL MAN. BE COOL
• shane doesnt wanna antagonize it or let it kno he knows and ryan knows so hes like... texting devon or whoever and thena nnounces to drive: 'can we stop at that rest area up ahead'
• and it is like. 4am. pitch dark. empty lot. THEY ALL JUST FUCKIN BOLT OUT OF THE CAR
• goatman starts being funky. harsh blood/copper smell in the air. they can hear it in the car mimicking shanes voice, reciting the 'FUCK U GOATMAN' shit
• "THIS IS OUR BRIDGE NOW"
• TAKE IT BACK ITS URS AHHHH

-bfu goin to revisit and investigate that church in final prayer

• theyre gonna stay in the same house...place....thing the og crew did; ver small town, ver quaint. set up cameras similar to how og crew did. cozy
• they get lost tryina find church. locals cruel and unhelpful (mirroring how og crew were treated)
• eventually find it, its ver creepy, across that field. TOLLING OF THE IRON BELL BRINGS THE FAITHFUL TO THEIR KNEES quote or something
• ryan launches into history and mystery surrounding the church and town; makes note that the kids who set the sheep on fire in the incident with the og crew were framed for og crews death and respective disappearances
• late start on day bc plane was late or somethin but ryan wants to get shots of the church in the sunset so they can do more time filming tomorrow or SOMETHING IDK FUCKIN EXCUSES
• is this shyan i donno
• first night of sleep, neither of htem snooze well. have very VIVId, MEMORABLE nightmares that sorta rattle them, but they both ignore them.
• is this cult oriented? or just wickerman-y. i donno
• they go back to the church, do a daytime investigation, get interrupted by local authority and have to postpone for a day. ('we have a permit to be here')
• second night, SAME NIGHTMARES, SAME INTENSITY, SAME LEVEL OF MEMORABILITY
• THIRD DAY, theyre determined to get it. daytime investigation goes well, nothing too weird. the stairwell behind the bookcase boarded up on the first day they came, but now its open ooooh spoopy
• they catch weird sounds on the spirit box; baby wailings, og priests voice, very freaky to ryan unexplainable to shane
• suns setting fast. crew leaves them to their overnight (is it an overnight idk)
• they start poking around. go up into the belltower and that big ol bell starts bongin. hurriedly leave ('that bell hasnt rung in years!!! not since... FATHER whatshisname i forgot')
• notice CULTISTS? VILLAGERS? coming up the hell ver spooooopily. they retreat into church and try to et phone home but no response
• they board up the door to the church and one of them has the bright idea to go down the staircase; maybe is escape?
• stairs steep and stone slick so shane does a SLIP MANA MOVE and breaks his leg falling down the stairs
• INT HE TUNNELS
• shane is surprisingly ver calm about all this and ryan is very NOT. throughout whole thing sorta shane has to talk him through what to do, eg, 'youll have to piggyback me' 'stay calm, just keep going')
• quickly realize something IN THE TUNNELS WITH THEM RUH ROH RAGGY
• do i have them die down there or nah. idk

-we have arrived at WEREWOLF SHANE SHIT

• on location, seems pretty normal, but as they investigate whatever creepy building they sorta come to realize that theres evidence of squatters recently inhabiting the place
• kinda mutely agree not to do solo investigation for fear of running into a vagrant; want to avoid possible altercations
• ITS A FULL MOOON SPOOOOPY
• theyre being overtly cautious, very obviously trying not to mess with whoevers living there but still needing to get the episode done
• on upper floor, they hear BIG BAD OMINOUS noises coming from below
• oh shit cut cut cut
• slowly and VERY cautiously trying to get out of the building now without running into who or whats freaking out below them
• sounds ominously quiet down, everyones very scared, but theyre still makin prog. cameras off. they get to like, second floor and the flashlights catch SOMETHING
• EVERYONE PANIC and start just BOLTING for the exit when shane gets aboslutlely fucking blindsided by the ww living there and gets bit in ensuing chaos
• ww runs tf off, but shanes in a bad way