yumes but i just share what these guys mean to me instead

so to be honest yumeing is a big source of comfort for me. i keep a lot of it to myself but im happy to talk about it and talk any kind of au with these characters . im not that picky if i see yaoi of them on my timeline but these guys mean a lot to me ..

• hokuto hidaka - #1 forever, i don’t play about this guy. my biggest sense of familiarity comes from him. i don’t actively talk about ongoings in enstars except for hokuto and adjacent trickstar things. but im always thinking about him, he’ll be the guy i love the most for forever.
• oguro kafka - a lot of people like him but i feel like discussions into him are a little far and few in between. i will actively say i love him and might say romantic things but im like an omniscient presence in his relationship with shunin (parasocial)
• sunday oak - really becoming a character i associate alot with my identity and inner self, i love him to a degree i have trouble expressing and hope to continue doing so ^_^

——— these steer a different direction: close to my heart, but not any kind of yume. i just have a lot of love and closeness to these guys. (not necessarily romantic)

• nishizono renga - i love him so profoundly. he’s a beautiful character and probably one of the few characters i have cried over a few times. i love his story, i love obaachan lovers (see:kamioshi) everything about him is amazing to me.. i could go on for forever methinks…
• ten murakumo - ough. it’s a little embarrassing but i feel this guy on a lot of levels. i would say he’s kind of my favorite after kafka. i’ve made a lot of effort to study this guy and as a result i’ve found a lot of similarities in the way we see things. thus.. my cringe was born.. hopefully him and i can both grow in our respective lives. i’ll be your cuck forever tenkun
• nagi hachinoya - love love love. the embodiment of love, to me. i understand those who love you in all manners of ways.
• HONORABLE MENTION: itaru chigasaki. this man changed my life in more than one he became like an idol to me and also he’s really beautiful hilarious and very fascinating to me forverber
• HONORABLE MENTION 2: raeger sos: took up real estate in my mind for almost a decade straight.had so many hcs abt this guy he was kinda my oc. big love

yume EXES:

• subaru akehoshi - we also had a good run and i almost convinced myself i could yume freely and this could be a normal hobby but then i felt weird. i love u subaru U have given me life and much more. im a subamako fan now actually
• alhaitham ? - tbh i didn’t explicitly stop liking him i just feel kinda disconnected with genshin’s world rn JCHSJNSSJ but he’s very beautiful and gorgeous to me forever. in another life i’d be adamant abt a homoromantic/asexual hc for him
• kazuha - same as above lol but thank u for shoving me in the right direction with my fetish for guys with long hair
• scara genshin - same fate but ngl i’d still indulge in him if i was feeling it. he’s less of an ex explicitly i just don’t think he belongs in top category either
• lyney genshin — lowkey i was thinking about this recently so here’s a story time for the 0 people that probably look at this. i kinda became obsessed with him when he got leaks because of how much more i was rocking w his design compared to travail, and then the archon quest then his story quest really got me. then i had finished everything and was rlly happy w my c0 r1 lyney i even forgave him for taking all 300 of my pulls. but i had a friend who i never shared the somewhat developing attachment i had for him with explicitly and i guess i seemed more like a normal fan so they started calling him their boyfriend and stuff around me and eventually husband w me n our shared friends. like i kinda just got majorly cucked and im someone who doesn’t rlly feel like i can attach myself like that to characters people in proximity to me also like. so i kinda stopped my liking of him in That Way but it kinda felt unresolved for a while. it’s hard to say ex esp bc i feel like i like scara more in a crazy way but he’s very close to my heart

guys i just like but i dont really yume or they’re in yaoi in my head (im emotionally constipated and a fujo):

• wise zzz (lowkey im this close to yumeing him but we don’t talk abt that)
• xavier lads
• anaxa hsr
• aventurine hsr
• brad helios
• dino helios
• march fom
• seb sdv
• doug rf4
• souma enst
• blade hsr
• phainon hsr
• chrom fire emblem
• leo fire emblem
• takumi fire emblem
• venti genshin
• toshi hakuoki
• cove ol
• jumin mysme
• allen prli
• nayuki 18t