it all sounds very obvious and cliche. I just want to be on my own and I am holding that as the highest value right now. I hope I will continue my love of art, symbology, mysticism, philosophy, healing, healing, healing, ecology throughout my whole life. The perpetual student. But I am not ashamed of that. I love school. I also love him. I hope most of the problems we are dealing with that make us so weepy are temporary. I want to continue to be kind. I want to keep reading as if each sentence is an absolute universe in itself. I want to be patient. I want to minimize. My life is very complex and it makes it easy to organize if there less visual weight burdening me. I want to continue to learn and read and explore. I want to integrate the people and ideas that I have kept separate. I hate I exclude some people because I think they are strangers. I wonder if my guilt for being discerning is valid or something caused from virtually injuring people. Any harm is important enough to be inscribed within the giant leather bound book on my left shoulder. I am moody, happy, un-present, most present, so zen, so mindful, exhausted, happy, listing, and again. The lecture on emotional healing hit me so hard. The work needed to be done presses on my. How long will I have to sit. I am scared. But now I know a method. I like how dark it is out there. I have not written in a very long time. I just have not trusted myself. But this tool helps me remember what is important.