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I'm having fun with this. It really does help you see things in a different light...

Hello Kitty follows:
  • booneiowa.us
  • travelnorthiowa.com
  • traveldubuque.com
  • vacationokoboji.com
  • catchdesmoines.com
apr 17 2014 ∞
apr 17 2014 +
  • cook
  • shop
  • go out to eat
  • go to a movie
  • drive
  • clean
  • sleep
  • walk outside
dec 28 2012 ∞
dec 28 2012 +
may 29 2012 ∞
may 29 2012 +
  • Yesterday is gone. Tomorrow has not yet come. We have only today. Let us begin. - Mother Teresa
  • Willpower....having the strength or willingness to do what matters most to you. - Kelly McGonigal
  • 12 Things...
  • Per Dr. Sanjay Gupta
      • Don't think of exercise as optional
      • Pump your heart to better your brain
      • Move it or lose it
      • Get your kids in the act
      • Stop eating BEFORE you're full
      • Fall out of love with sugar
      • Grow a garden
      • Eat a rainbow diet
      • Don't skimp on sleep
      • Stop medicating, start meditating
      • Schedule "you" time
dec 18 2011 ∞
sep 29 2013 +
  • hide the remote - get up amd change the tv
  • use a spoon to mix, the the electric mixer
  • take each load of laundry downstairs seperately
  • when cleaning up, do small piles instead of one big one
  • chop fresh vegetables instead of buying frozen ones
  • use heavy pots and pans when cooking
  • complete items on your home to do list
  • stand up and march during your tv shows
  • don't yell across the room/house, get up and go talk to the person
  • stand up when doing your hair/make-up
  • walk around while on the phone
  • hand-wash dishes
  • hand-wash your car
  • put items you use frequently in harder to reach areas so you will need to move to ...
dec 8 2011 ∞
dec 8 2011 +
  • AVEDA
  • MAC
  • John Fluevog
  • Disney (for vacation!!)
  • Torrid
  • Lane Bryant
  • Dr. Martens
  • Sephora
feb 9 2011 ∞
may 16 2011 +
  • Disney package
  • Health insurance
  • Tuition for next year
  • Down payment for house
  • Day Camp fee
dec 2 2010 ∞
apr 5 2011 +
  • dream job
  • house
  • affordable, appropriate health insurance
  • funding for two weeks of vacation every year
  • normal blood pressure
  • life insurance
  • all the best for feefaa
  • the ability to really communicate with G
  • more faith
  • opportunity to save more
sep 23 2010 ∞
sep 23 2010 +
  • rain on the roof
  • thunderstorms
  • a child's laughter
  • a baby sneeze
  • feefaa sleeping
  • silence
  • a soft fire
  • breaking glass
jul 28 2010 ∞
jul 28 2010 +
  • Criminal Minds
  • CSI Miami
  • Hoarders
  • Intervention
  • Obsessed
  • Family Guy
  • GRIMM
jul 9 2010 ∞
jun 20 2012 +
list icon
  • removing her as your friend (again in life)
jan 13 2010 ∞
may 17 2010 +
  • the past
  • cows at work
  • malls
  • shopping websites
  • food
jan 1 2010 ∞
may 17 2010 +
list icon
  • 06.17.2004 (actually it started on 06.16.2004)
  • Meeting her for the first time
  • Mother's Day weekend 2009
  • My first true love
  • Riding in Vaiva's car and feeling the baby kick for the first time
  • The summer of 1989
  • Getting laid off from my first "real" (post college) job
  • My grandfather becoming so furious that Ben and I tried to watch On Golden Pond
  • When I actually realized that I can do this all by myself
  • Finally graduating college
dec 28 2009 ∞
may 17 2010 +
  • Sight
    • sunsets
    • sunrises
  • Smell
    • my daughters sun drenched skin
    • basil
  • Touch
    • my daughters face
    • anything right after I clip my nails
  • Sound
    • a child's laughter
    • breaking glass
  • Taste
    • lemon
    • garlic
jul 12 2009 ∞
may 17 2010 +
  • went to see family
  • program interview
  • new staff hired for me
  • wrote letter of recommendation for S.W.
  • completed first vitamin goal
  • watched feefaa get very excited about Valentines Day
  • worked 2-8
  • realized I can't trust A.R. completely
  • had two days at work without the cow!!!
  • made a larger than usual payment on that one damn credit card! - not that it will really help, but it does make me feel better
feb 27 2009 ∞
may 17 2010 +
  • Friday after work
  • getting home after a long day and putting my lounge around clothes on
  • a new career
  • moving so we can be closer to mom-mom and others
  • air drying after a mid-afternoon bath in a cool dark room
  • snuggle-buggies!
  • G getting another job before we go crazy
feb 19 2009 ∞
may 17 2010 +
list icon
  • 1001 Books for Every Mood, by Hallie Ephron, PhD
  • 101 Exercises for the Soul, by Dr. Bernie S. Siegel
  • A Country Called Home, by Kim Barnes
  • A Day and a Night and a Day, by Glen Duncan
  • A Friend of the Family, by Lauren Grodstein
  • A Happy Marriage, by Rafael Yglesias
  • A Kiss Before Dying, by Ira Levin
  • A Much Younger Man, by Dianne Highbridge
  • A New Earth, by Eckhart Tolle
  • A Permanent Member of the Family, by Russell Banks
  • A Return to Love, by Marianne Williamson
  • A Week in December, by Sebastian Faulks
  • About Alice, by Calvin Trillin
  • Addition, by Toni Jordan
  • After Her, Joyce Maynard
  • Alice's Adventures in Wonderland, by Lewi...
feb 16 2009 ∞
feb 9 2018 +
  • NO WORK
  • it would be a Wednesday or Thursday, not a weekend (too many other people out and about on the weekends)
  • spending money in my purse or account
  • my daughter with me
  • sunshine with a temp of 50 degrees, little wind
  • a full tank of gas in the car
feb 12 2009 ∞
may 17 2010 +
  • The Cure, Siamese Twins

"Leave me to die, You won't remember my voice, I walked away and grew old, You never talk, We never smile, I scream, You're nothing, I don't need you anymore, You're nothing, It fades and spins..."

  • Tori Amos, Leather

"I could just pretend that you love me the night would lose all sense of fear but why do I need you to love me when you can't hold what I hold dear..."

  • Tori Amos, Tear In Your Hand

"HAZE all clouded up my mind in the DAZE of the why it couldve never been so you say and I say you know you're full of wish and your "baby baby baby babies" I tell you there're pieces of me you've never seen maybe she's just pieces of me you've never seen well..."

feb 9 2009 ∞
may 17 2010 +

First I need to understand that you have got to play to win....maybe I should pick up a ticket, just in case...

  • pay off all debt
    • credit card
    • car
    • student loan
  • purchase a house
  • travel, travel, travel
feb 6 2009 ∞
may 17 2010 +
  • 2009/2010 planner, pocket size
  • 8 ibuprofen, 1 multi, 1 vit. C, 1 cal/mag/zinc - all in a baggie
  • a pocket packet of tissue
  • an ink pen
  • AVEDA pure-fume spirit, MAC lipstick in 5N, MAC lipstick in Desire, MAC lipstick in Double Shot, valet key to my car, mint julep lip balm, AVON Disney Princess lip balm, 2 Looney Toons band-aids, AVEDA hand relief - all in my make up pouch
  • envelope of "important" cards
  • fortune cookie fortune, "enhance your karma by being kind to everyone you encounter"
  • iPod touch
  • MAC lipstick in Push-up Plum
  • my $ notebook
  • my coupon file
  • my coupons
  • my perfect fit card from Victoria's Secre...
feb 4 2009 ∞
jul 28 2010 +
  • flu
  • headaches
  • being broke
  • baby not feeling well
  • my job and the people I work with/for
  • the economy
  • cramps
jan 31 2009 ∞
may 17 2010 +
list icon
  • my daughter
  • me
  • W
  • (most of) my family
  • my friends
  • dark chocolate
  • red wine
  • water
  • the color pink
  • hdo3
  • silence
  • Hello Kitty
  • naps in the middle of the afternoon on the weekends
  • days off in the middle of the week
  • babies
  • relaxing music
  • learning something new
  • angels
  • Prince music - all of it, he is a musical genius
jan 26 2009 ∞
dec 31 2013 +
  • page 98
  • page 103
  • page 109
  • page 112
  • page 114
  • page 115
  • page 119
  • page 124
  • page 125
  • page 130
apr 29 2014 ∞
apr 29 2014 +

from Prevention, March 2013

  • for more energy
    • bran cereal
    • chicken breast
  • for blood sugar control
    • bran cereal
    • lentils
    • walnuts
    • eggs
    • strawberries
    • quinoa
    • oatmeal
  • for heart health
    • bran cereal
    • soba noodles
    • tomato sauce
    • spinach
    • apples
apr 5 2013 ∞
sep 29 2013 +
  • save half of my winnings, no matter what
  • pay off (if possible) my credit card
  • make needed home repairs
  • take a NICE vacation
  • get a new computer for the family to use
  • pay tuition to get feefaa through 8th grade in her current school
  • set aside tuition for feefaa high school
  • new car
  • go visit hdo3, alone
dec 28 2012 ∞
dec 28 2012 +
  • Olivia Newton John records
  • Erik Estrada posters
  • Barbies -> Cabbage Patch Kids
  • Stuffed animals
  • Muppet stuff
  • Little Smurf figurines
  • Books
mar 5 2012 ∞
mar 5 2012 +
  • inhale through nose for a count of 4
  • hold for a count of 7
  • exhale slowly through open mouth, make a whoosh sound, for a count of 8
  • repeat for a total of four breaths two times a day
dec 8 2011 ∞
dec 8 2011 +
  • Start taking a lunch to work
  • Cut the Starbucks habit down (or off?!)
  • Stop snacking at work from the store
  • No more purse shopping
  • Do my own damn nails
  • Reduce the number of times we eat out to once per week
  • Stop impulse shopping
  • Complete shopping trips for needed household items WITHOUT buying feefaa something unnecessary
  • Compare prices and get the best deals
may 11 2011 ∞
nov 26 2011 +
  • Disneyland
  • Minneapolis again and again and again....
  • Portland
  • Canada
  • Mexico
  • Russia
  • New Orleans
  • New York City
  • Kenya
  • Nigeria
  • Ireland
  • Grand Canyon
nov 16 2010 ∞
nov 16 2010 +
  • Disintegration, The Cure
  • Pornography, The Cure
  • Violator, Depeche Mode
  • Pretty Hate Machine, Nine Inch Nails
  • The Mind Is A Terrible Thing To Taste, Ministry
  • Brotherhood, New Order
  • The Innocents, Erasure
aug 6 2010 ∞
nov 16 2010 +
  • being unhealthy in body
  • being unhealthy in mind
  • being unhealthy in spirit
  • dreaming in the past
  • beating myself up emotionally
  • taking the less physically active way
  • eating even though I am full
  • texting people that don't deserve to hear from me
  • spending money that I really don't have
  • purchasing my lunch
jul 20 2010 ∞
nov 30 2010 +
  • sleep late (but wake up before I get my no- coffee killer headache)
  • hot coffee brewing
  • nice long shower
  • check computer and sip on the coffee
  • clean, clean, clean
  • get dressed
  • go to Starbucks
  • get feefaa from school early (I don't know how she got there because on my ideal day I didn't take her - is that horrible of me?!?)
  • go play at the park
  • read a good book outside under a tree
  • nap in a field
  • fix an awesome dinner with feefaa
  • snugglebuggies
  • sleep
may 12 2010 ∞
may 17 2010 +
  • i wish we could all go on vacation together, to another state, too far away to drive to, for at least a week
  • i wish we were a two income household
  • i wish i did not have to pay rent every month
  • i wish feefaa could have play dates over to our house
jan 10 2010 ∞
may 17 2010 +
  • tatoos
    • large angel
    • small angel
    • love goddess symbol
    • cross
  • nasty lip scar from hockey puck
dec 30 2009 ∞
may 17 2010 +
  • Bottenfield
  • St. Matthew
  • Central
  • Pivot Point
  • University of Illinois at Chicago
sep 7 2009 ∞
may 17 2010 +
  • LUST = raul, sprinkler guy, mailman, hdoIII
  • GLUTTONY = when I order lunch that someone else pays for even though I have a perfectly good meal in my bag at work, my lunch usually goes to waste
  • GREED = not leaving my job despite the fact that i hate it, letting others pay for things because "i have no money"
  • SLOTH = sometimes on beautiful weekend days, my daughter will want me to get up and take her outside and play and enjoy the day, all I do is ignore her pleas and lay in bed until my head hurts
  • WRATH = really wanting the cows at work to suffer and writhe in pain, ditto for the donor
  • ENVY = other women's toned, slender bodies
  • PRIDE = my hair, my eyes and the fact that I know how to look at a man and make hi...
feb 11 2009 ∞
jul 28 2010 +
  • moving here alone in 1995
  • going to college
  • "helping" P
  • fee-faa
  • applying for the program.....?
  • not accepting the state position, God I hope not...
feb 19 2009 ∞
nov 30 2010 +
  • money
  • my job
  • health insurance
  • my program interview
  • not getting into the program
  • living here for at least one more year
  • weight issues
  • all of the "could have been"s that involve h
feb 17 2009 ∞
aug 28 2010 +
  • Day Care (this will change when she goes to kindergarten soon)
  • Car Payment (this will evntually be paid off?)
  • Mastercard (this may get paid down??)
  • Power Bill (always will need it)
  • Cable/Internet (always will need it)
  • Cell Phone (always)
  • Car/Property Insurance (always)
  • Rent (always)
  • Student Loan (this will never get paid down or off!!!!) GOING UP IN JUNE 09 - WTF am I gonna do??????
feb 13 2009 ∞
may 17 2010 +
list icon
  • Bleeding Love by Leona Lewis = feefaa
  • California Callin' by Enrique Iglesias = G
  • Love Song by The Cure = h
  • Freelove by Depeche Mode = Z
  • Cool by Gwen Stefani = P
  • The Heart of the Matter by Don Henley = R
  • The Funeral Party by The Cure = D
  • Lucretia My Reflection by Sisters of Mercy = R
  • Temple of Love by Sisters of Mercy = Z
  • Cuts You Up by Peter Murphy = J
  • Boys of Summer by Don Henley = Dad
  • Prince songs = happiness
  • Boom Boom Pow = feefaa
feb 9 2009 ∞
may 17 2010 +
  • boredom
  • work
  • not having any alone time
  • arrogant, rude, back-stabbing cows that happen to work in the same place that i do, and the place is full of them!
  • CRAMPS!!!
  • not having any money
  • the fact that I can not stop thinking about h.
feb 7 2009 ∞
may 17 2010 +
  • AVEDA outer peace line, all of it
  • products that keep my curly hair under control
  • MAC eye shadows
  • AVEDA pure-fume sprays
  • AVEDA Chakras 1 and 6 (maybe a few others too)
  • AVEDA tourmaline face mask
  • AVEDA tourmaline eye creme
  • AVEDA mosscara in black
  • AVEDA liquid foundation
  • MAC lipsticks
  • MAC make-up brushes, all of them
  • AVEDA Green Science line - it's hell getting old
feb 4 2009 ∞
may 17 2010 +
list icon
  • feefaa
  • vacation to disney
  • moving expenses
  • retirement
  • college tuition
  • a day at the AVEDA spa/salon
jan 31 2009 ∞
may 17 2010 +
  • hair loss
  • thin skin
  • nursing home life
  • loss of sex drive
  • teeth falling out
jan 26 2009 ∞
may 17 2010 +
  • garage sales
  • estate sales
  • early movies
  • fruit picking
  • farmers markets
  • free bowling
  • free skateland
may 29 2013 ∞
jun 9 2013 +
  • Take 3 deep breaths - 5 seconds in, 5 seconds out - to slow your heart rate and the pace of your stress hormones.
  • Copy a cat: Stretch and then shake it out.
  • Sing a favorite song. You'll breathe more fully and the increased oxygen will do your body good.
  • Hang your head forward as if it were a heavy ball, then move it slowly to the side, back, side and front. Repeat. Circle around twice in the opposite direction.
  • Sit up straight. When your shoulders are back, you open up your chest and breathe more freely.
  • Hold the hand of someone you love. Skin-to-skin touch is calming.
  • Pop a piece of gum. Chewing loosens your jaw, where you often store stress.
  • Take a mental break - focus on a photo of a loved one, a goal or a favorite place....
sep 20 2012 ∞
dec 28 2012 +
  • Kitchen
    • storage chest
  • Living Room
    • sofa
    • file cabinet?
  • Bathroom
    • towel bar
    • mirror
  • Our Bedroom
    • rug
    • under the bed storage
    • small tv w/ dvd
  • Feefaa Bedroom
    • under the bed storage
    • small tv w/ dvd
  • Other
jul 22 2012 ∞
aug 19 2012 +
  • tomatoes
  • carrots
  • berries
  • onions
  • asparagus
  • peaches
  • organic anything
  • grass fed beef and dairy
may 25 2012 ∞
may 25 2012 +
  • Be aware of the difference between anticipating and living. Joy is rooted in the present.
  • Let go of perfection; the most delicious moments are often the messiest.
  • Living better doesn't always mean trying harder. Ease up.
  • Avoid getting trapped in someone else's story. Be the author of your own life.
  • Forgiveness isn't about them, it's about you.
  • You can remember good times without losin yourself in nostalgia.
  • The best gifts let someone know how much you love, not how much you spent.
  • REST IS NOT A LUXURY, IT IS A NECESSITY.
  • Action is one of the best remedies for fear.
  • Often it's not our values that are faulty, but our priorities.
  • Try not to confuse one defeat with total ...
dec 13 2011 ∞
apr 4 2012 +
list icon
  • The Gravedigger's Daughter, Joyce Carol Oates:

"Not the thin pale froth-sleep that washed over her aching brain and brought little nourishment but the deeper more profound sleep she required, the sleep that slowed your heartbeat toward death, the sleep that stripped from you all awaereness of time, place, who you are or have ever been."

  • Letters to God, Patrick Doughtie and John Perry:

"Prayer is just telling God what's in your heart and asking him to help you with it."

  • Beasts, Joyce Carol Oates:

"Sometimes you fall in love without knowing. Without realizing. And it's too late, and you can't undo it."

feb 9 2011 ∞
jan 3 2015 +
  • affordable health insurance
  • clubs
  • courting gifts and gestures
  • disposable income
  • funky hair colors
  • hdoIII
  • heels
  • hibernation holidays
  • loud music
  • not spending the night in my own bed
  • roadtrips without all the planning
  • size 12
  • reading every night
nov 16 2010 ∞
dec 2 2010 +
  • new bed
  • new TV - Sony, 40", 1080p, 120Hz
  • additional storage space
  • eye appointments
  • dentist appointments
  • new computer or laptop
  • screen door
  • new cable service,(or dish?)
  • Kat Von D liquid eyeliner in Black Metal Love
  • more Lipglass colors
sep 15 2010 ∞
jul 22 2012 +
  • annoyed
  • bored
  • curvy
  • determined
  • envious
  • frustrated
  • gluttony
  • helpful
  • imagination
  • jealous
  • kind
  • loving
  • mother
  • nosey
  • orgasmic
  • paul
  • queen
  • rude
  • sexual
  • tired
  • unsure
feb 26 2009 ∞
jul 26 2010 +
  • Rent
  • Student Loan (for what, a meaningless horrible low paying miserable job?!)
  • Church (this actually feels good)
  • Day Care (after school or after camp)
  • Savings
  • FeeFaa Savings
  • Tuition (seriously, for first grade? I must be sick in the head)
  • Mastercard (and I do mean MASTERcard)
  • ComEd
  • Comcast (this one I want so bad to put something nasty on the memo line of the check)
  • T-Mobile
  • Insurance (car and renters)
  • Car Plates (if they want to charge that much for me to have them, then they can deal with a check from each month of the previous year for a small amount, all to equal the exorbitant total)
jul 8 2010 ∞
nov 23 2010 +
list icon
  • when you have a BEST friend in high school and she sleeps with every guy you date while you are dating them and then you finally wise up and cut her out of your life for 15 years and then SHE requests friendship on facebook and you accept because you think she may have something worthwhile to say, something to make the bullshit of the past understandable, but you get absolutely nothing. not a single word. no post. no message. no nothing.
jan 13 2010 ∞
may 17 2010 +
  • Bleeding Love
  • Rockin Around the Christmas Tree
  • Jingle Bell Rock
  • Boom Boom Pow
  • The Heart of the Matter
  • Born to be Somebody
jan 1 2010 ∞
mar 5 2012 +
  • helping P for a long time
  • my job and all I do when I am on the clock and off the clock and should be spending time with my family and tending to their needs
dec 28 2009 ∞
may 17 2010 +
  • woke up tired
  • rushed washing
  • had to drive with the frost blocking a significant portion of my view
  • clocked in one minute late - there goes my chance at the free lunch
  • no coffee at work - but, I had my sample of Starbuck's Via - that stuff it really good!
  • program bus was 45 minutes late
  • crashed HARD off the Via
  • difficulty with the hospice DNR
  • worked tired
  • had to chase the drunk biker resident all over hell and back
  • tired
  • G's ticket = $100, G = unemployeed, MY $100 = G's ticket
  • making dinner now, tired
mar 13 2009 ∞
may 17 2010 +
  • AVEDA Chakra - #6 or #1
  • MAC eyeshadow in Yogurt
  • printer ink!!
  • AVEDA foundation in Kasha
  • AVEDA face stuff
  • work clothes
  • Ms. Guinea-Guinea stuff
    • hay
    • food
    • bedding
  • MAC khol liner in black
  • AVEDA Mosscara
  • Fee-Faa lunch stuff
  • deoderant
  • Fee-Faa medicines
  • printer ink (again) and always
feb 23 2009 ∞
sep 15 2010 +
  • what would happen if I told all the cows at work what I really felt about them and then gave them all the finger?
  • how will I do at my program interview?
  • would I feel better with more or less sleep?
  • OK let's say I don't get a job before August should I still risk it and move there? She needs to be down there to start school...but, I need a job too.
  • taxes
  • I can't believe he lost his job, what the hell are we gonna do?????
  • arrested - you SOB!!
  • screw the program
  • my mother fucking drives me crazy!!!
  • I can't believe that I have not only read BUT actually really enjoyed the twilight series....
    • I spoke too soon, I really enjoyed books ...
feb 17 2009 ∞
nov 30 2010 +
list icon
  • Melissa
  • David S
  • Vaiva
  • Greg
  • hdo3
  • Julie K
  • Jen
feb 15 2009 ∞
jul 2 2013 +
  • shower
  • drink coffee
  • read the newspaper
  • view sale ads
  • clip coupons
  • check web sites for sales
  • make my shopping list
  • shop
  • nap/rest
  • make a nice dinner
  • drink wine
  • enjoy the evening with my family
feb 8 2009 ∞
may 17 2010 +
  • Arkansas
  • California
  • Illinois
  • Indiana
  • Iowa
  • Kentucky
  • Louisiana
  • Michigan
  • Minnesota
  • Missouri
  • Nevada
  • New York (drove thru, never stayed in)
  • Ohio
  • Tennesse
  • Washington
  • Wisconsin
feb 6 2009 ∞
jul 28 2010 +
  • to be the best mother I can be
  • one more child
  • financial security
  • a home with walls of color
  • smaller debt to savings ratio
  • happiness at my job
  • better physical/emotional/spiritual health
  • love
  • a talent
jan 31 2009 ∞
may 17 2010 +
  • eat healthy
  • exercise more
  • slim down
  • color my hair dark brown
  • tell d off
  • become single
  • find a new job
  • Raul ;)
jan 26 2009 ∞
may 17 2010 +