• what date from 2015 will remain etched upon your memory? january 24, july 10
  • what was your biggest achievement of the year? i became more mature and independent AND really broaded my horizons when it comes to music. but what i'm most proud of is my writing - it's clear how much i've improved since i started writing on a daily basis two years ago
  • did you suffer illness or injury? mental illness - dysmorphia, anxiety and possibily depression too
  • what was the best thing you bought? a few books i enjoyed reading and my clothes. i don't want to seem shallow but my fashion sense was on point this year and wearing clothes that i found aesthetically pleasing made me feel confident and that's important when you hate yourself 80% of the time
  • where did most of your money go? probably clothes
  • what did you get really, really, really excited about? seeing bleachers live and meeting jack antonoff; having one night flirts with strangers (never went further than a couple kisses and i strongly regret it now BUT i felt wild and free while doing it so? maybe it was worth it??)
  • which song will always remind you of 2015? as i said before, i listened to more songs and albums in 2015 than i did the past 5 years combined so, obviously, lots and lots of songs will always remind me of this year. here's a few examples (these songs are not necessarily my favorites, they just remind me of 2015):
    • carly rae jepsen - e•mo•tion (album) - her whole album is amazing but run away with me is simply unforgettable. definitely my favorite song of 2015
    • cigarettes after sex - affection (song)
    • george ezra - wanted on voyage (album)
    • halsey - is there somewhere (song)
    • hurts - wings (song)
    • kendrick lamar - king kunta (song)
    • lana del rey - high by the beach (song)
    • marina and the diamonds - blue (song)
    • nate ruess - great big storm (song)
    • one direction - love you goodbye (song)
    • sam smith - in the lonely hour (album)
    • sheppard - geronimo (song)
    • taylor swift - new romantics (song)
    • twenty one pilots - tear in my heart (song)
    • walk the moon - next in line (song)
    • walk the moon - talking is hard (album)
    • the weeknd - can't feel my face (song)
  • compared to this time last year, are you:
    • sadder of happier? i've been feeling very inconsistent - one day i feel suicidal and seriously consider ending my life, the other day i'm full of joy and can't help thinking everything's gonna be ok. tomorrow i'm starting my medication for depression, maybe i'll have a definite answer in a few days! but right now, at this exact moment, i'm probably just as happy as i was exactly one year ago. i'm warm and safe
    • older or wiser? both. much, much wiser though
    • richer or poorer? poorer (financially speaking)
    • how did you spend christmas? my mom and two of her brothers don't speak to each other since last christmas so, naturally, we didn't spend christmas at my grandma's like we usually do. we spent it at our holiday house with my mom's boyfriend and his 15 year old daughter. i didn't exactly have a bad time but i didn't feel very christmassy
  • what were your favorite tv programmes? friends (the answer to this question will never change), modern family, brooklyn 99
  • do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year? i don't hate anyone but i pretty much dislike all of my friends - pretty sad huh? let's see if i can make some real friends i actually like this year
  • what was the best book you read? dark places by gillian flynn or elizabeth is missing by emma healey
  • what was your greatest musical discovery? carly rae jepsen, disclosure, halsey, melanie martinez, sam smith
  • what did you want and get? to meet jack antonoff, to become more mature, to find an old friend i had lost contact with about 10 years ago
  • what did you want and not get? to fall in love (starting to think this whole thing of falling in love and being someone's girlfriend will never happen to me)
  • what was your favorite film of this year? legend
  • how many people did you kiss during the year? three (all of them were strangers!!! is it too obvious i have emotional issues??)
  • what did you do on your birthday? spent the day with my mom and her boyfriend, nothing memorable (i actually recall announcing "it's my birthday!" at midnight, my mom looking at me and murmuring "happy birthday" and then going back to her magazine)
  • what one thing would have made your year immesurably more satisfying? having a best friend or, at least, someone who shares my interest in social justice and has the same sense of humor as me
  • how would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2015? it depends. whatever i wear, i ask myself "would i be featured on the cover of vogue wearing this?" if the answer is yes, i wear it and i wear it with confidence
  • what kept you sane? my meds, music and comedy series
  • which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most? george ezra, tom hardy, harry styles
  • who did you miss? for a while, miguel. but then i realized what a jerk he is and got over him pretty quickly. i missed dale when we stopped talking - the first time. we haven't talked in a month but now i'm like... whatever. i got over it like i get over everything
  • who was the best new person you met? dale
  • do you have any regrets about the year? OH BOY! yes i regret kissing random strangers and risking being raped just to feel loved and admired. i wouldn't do it again if i could go back in time
  • tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2015 you don't need anyone. you're powerful, strong and no one is important enough to hurt you. you've been through so much on your own and it's time you realize the best company you will ever get is yourself. and your mom...... OBVIOUSLY
dec 31 2015 ∞
jan 2 2016 +