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20-something + Dutch. ENFP. Collector + maker of things. Online shop owner. Another nutrition-freak, eating as dairyfree and low-sugar/carb as she can, always vegetarian, preferably plant-based. Yoga-addict. MUAH inspired by old Hollywood glamour. Holistic beautician, soon to be therapist and dietitian. Admirer of the arts. Horror fan. Laughs at people who speak of themselves in third person.

bookmarks:
a ~ travel (soon hopefully)
notes (things to look forward to)
notes (favourite authors)
Anouk to buy (huis)
to do (voorjaar)

Yellow roses, glitter nail polish, analogue mail & sending it as a surprise, vintage jewelry (often 20s), signature snacking on fries, erotica, framed nature a la herman de vries, hours long phone calls (or bringing someone home over the phone), reading about neuropsychology, collecting shells at the beach, Hermann Hesse's Steppenwolf, cities that never sleep comme moi, the opposite of a writers block, attempting a plant-based diet, bringing strange holiday souvenirs home like pebbles or animal bones or a casino poker chip, antique mirrors, experimental films, Italy, ceiling ornaments, fake reptile leather and faux fur, femmes fatales, pistache icecream, perfume bottles, mineral stones, John Coltrane, painted flower still lifes and botanical drawings, vintage national georpahic magazine, ostrich and peacock feathers, grandma scarfs around my neck or head or bag, life imitating art, Twin Peaks, sleek typography, Belgian cities, ear piercings, power games, wabi sabi, the echo of my heels on a silent night's street, high slits, feather boa's as interior decoration, stained glass, goldthread hair, crushing waves, traveling by train, traveling by van, traveling by plane, delicate cami's - heavy knits, Dille & Kamille, pretty packaging and product design, dirty talk done right, Anais Nin, matcha and chia latte's, jaguar pattern, nips, (needle) felting, joined art school student arrogance when I went to Rietveld (while there really is no reason to be arrogant to go there anymore), being able to let all arrogance go when enrolling at another art academy (KABK), the melancholy of a plane flying over at 3 AM, sequins, black nail polish, my plant-based hot coco in the morning, when the art and sex is in my mind, lingerie, woodworking, stealing in order to remember (like the reserved sign of a restaurant), shooting (short) films and editing, listening to rustling leaves, ever chriping birds at our vacation home, the moments that count (holding and rocking your grief-ridden friend until she falls asleep, volunteer working at the hospice and refugee center, being the one that stays awake at the hostpital - I live for fulfilling this value), bathing outdoors, HIIT, shadowplay, the movie of my life: Choses Secretes, city lights reflected on a rainy street, (indoor) rowing, vintage furniture, my favourite place to be in the whole world: in a plane above the clouds (I want to learn the Hobby just for this lonely, poetic, visceral sake alone already, because that is what it ís to me), aquariums & oceaniums, spirituality, scratching your man's back when he's on top of you taking you with your perfect red nails because it matters, Six Feet Under, drunk dialing or tv watching (because that is what your twenties for), Sean Paul, my calm down method of browsing an atlas or playing educational apps, coconut water, evenings of practazing elegant hairstyles and walking around like an old moviestar in silk robes, corset training, my 'when it gets out of hand'-moments like when I end up at a your friends neighbours wedding drunk (true story), 'rustic' socks but sensual stockings, Brigitte Bardot hairdo's, Jane Birkin baskets, wine, strass stones in earrings, auteur directors, fireplace memoires, Chanel Rouge Noir, industrial elements and shabbyness mixed with elegance and decandence in living spaces (or what an old lover called 'the montmartre burlesque dressing room idea'), traveling the world through their cuisines, making a sport of being taken out for dinner by suitors when I was very poor and didn't want to spend my money on food, dried flowers, being transported on the back of a man's bike Turkish Delight style, star gazing emotions, music with a real dirty bassline, cafe philosophy - on wobbly bar chair's and all, my family's heritage (art, antiques and curiosa) and how I'm now forever attracted to all that jazz, death and the dying, investigating afterlife hypotheses, dangling my feet in a fountain while reading a book, choosing strange men for one nights as a study, Berlinde de Bruyckere, oriental double knitted silk carpets, park life, getting grabbed by the throat, a Christmas tree as only light source, lillies, cinéma vérité, antrophosophy, eating a lot of pineapple because it gets you tasting like pineapple, criminology, the quiet after the movie, the quiet after a classical concert, the quiet in a museum, the quiet after a book, the quiet during secret sex, pumping hearts, adrenaline rushes, breaking and entering at the zoo (i am not to blame, someone proposed it because he knew how, who am i to deny), while i still worked at an amusement park i knew how to open up the rides and go for a spin in the dark, being in my maker mindset, zebra prints, dreaming of tornado chasing, orchids, my house as a cabinet of curiosities or wunderkammer or life museum or magpie nest, ankle bracelets, white teeth and toothpaste breath, my boyfriend's earthly manly always oil-stained workplace hands, smoking men sans clothes avec cat (so again, my boyfriend), Gerard Reve, ankle boots, henna hands, lash extensions, a low table to sit on the floor on, biting my lip strategically, short skirts - high boots, eating with chopsticks, Bach, (scented) candles, when I win the game and am in control, when I loose the game and am out of control, this dynamic, cars that light signal you and flood you with a sudden sense of belonging, the silence of a snowy world, silk pillow cases, the confidence of walking in heels, Crystal Pite, 24 hour room service, when he knows how to kiss (and bite), wearing his jeans/shirt/sweater/Calvins at goodbye, de Correspondent podcasts, Claudy Jongstra, bible stories, theology and visiting churches, tulips, when he's sick - making soup and sucking the fever from his dick, press photography, house plants, amature flower arranging, thrifting, on a boat on city waters - at the Amsterdam canals with friends for Kingsday or romantically with my lover at De Waterkant - I don't care, watching fashion week, Egon Schiele, filling notebooks like I forever do, writing on body parts as a portable post-it, drawing constellations between the freckles on my boyfriends back, stand-up comedy friends, playfulness, Spanish dance classes, attending lectures on health or art or science as a hobby, jugendstil & art nouveau, vertical urban gardening to the wall of my tiny city apartment (2015-2017), balcony gardening at my atelier, full-on gardening at my boyfriend and my place at the Veluwe, skincare, picking wildflower bouquets, 90's pop music, New York City, space cake - disclaimer: I am allowed to get excited over something that immature as I am happy to be able to get high since smoking a blunt often gets me sick - but usually there only ARE blunts so I end up being the only sober mom-like figure while my friends are flying high - most often I end up getting drunk instead but there seem to be cultural barriers between the drunk and the stoned - aren't there?, Greek mythology, baroque music, Lucretia, making pancakes after clubbing, scruffy men, fights that end in angry sex, negligé's, the Middle East, living cinematically, trading travel stories, the tradition of kayaking in the Ardennes, homo-erotic sadomasochistic literature, sweaty sports hair, sweaty sex hair, white or wooden or whitewash wooden floors, dancing bare-feet, braiding and wearing friendship bracelets well over-aged, hearing a stranger on an instrument out of the open window, vases, cloud formations, Zomergasten, fine dining, golden hour, Indian summer eve's, lemonwater beer, rooftops for sleeping or parties, poetry, airports, American pharmacy's, American courtesy, fossils, B52 cocktails, hotel life, make up sex, wake up sex, Parisenne habits, only some men smirk and smile sexy - and oh mine does, red light, taxidermy, buskers, wanderlusting, Icelandic nature + mindset + taste + people, nightlife, menthol cigarettes and not caring it's uncool, sleeping with braids for mermaid hair next morning, doing groceries at farmers markets (even the Schilderswijk's one), treating a hotel lobby as if it's your living room, balcony philosophy, polyglotism, pole dancing, weight lifting, light art/design, video installations, audiovisual art, watching contemporary dance & ballet, live jazz bar's, being the one that got away for more than one, truffle errythang, spring weather, IFFR, coffee table books, the MoMA store or any other museum's, window nudity (especially at someone's office), environmentalism, politics, news addiction, native North American culture, cities with a lot of water (big river, seaside, canals), massages, ayurverda, open air concerts, ballet beautiful, holism, ornamental grasses, philosophy, animals, studying natural disasters and unexplained phenomena, vegetarianism, veganism, activism, sailing, growing trees indoors (bonsai's or big), taking care of him under his desk and continuing when people walk in, chess, (displaying) maps, horse riding, Delft blue, the sea is my safe place, how you pulsate -implode and explode, implode and explode- after reading the last sentence in an amazing book, the open and accepting vibe at freeparties and squatparties, Den Haag, terrace culture, history, astronomy, paleontology, being high or drunk, being hyperfocussed, being lazy with films and food, sunbathing, the art of a good ad, house and wild cats, gladiolus, the Romanov dynasty, chansons, card games, architecture & exterior design, buddhism (selectively), taoism, horror films & games, marble, that Dolce Vita feeling, weaving, hollyhocks, living the vanlife, FIP radio station, bohemian lifestyle, books, mindfulness, yoga, meditation, investigating the possibility of the paranormal, sculpture gardens, vinyl + good cover art, spending the entire day in bed, Christmas time with medley's and all, the lone wolf moments when letting the sexy handy bartender decide on your life, polaroids, lipstick stains on napkins or wineglasses or fags, when there's a trumpetist with his trumpet amongst your group of friends (especially on a roof, on a boat at the canals, or at the windowsill while cooking together), remember when-anecdotes, board games, drunken games and dares (not only as a teenager), low budget movies, friendly sound of trams greeting, swimming in natural water, swimming in outdoor pools, broad men's shoulders, bedroom eyes, the best roadtrip I ever had - Italy - swimming in fountains - dancing with Italian boys at squares with lanterns in the trees - stupid-dangerous traintrack-games, VPRO, eating out for breakfast, badminton, Sunday morning weather (it either has to be really good or really bad), sticking movie tickets and festival wristbands and letters and leaves and feathers and what not into books, things that aren't a shell in the form of a shell (naturally I'm dying for the clamshell e-reader from It Follows), (wild) camping, the calmness from passing your mid-twenties after being a very danger-prone teen, although still treasuring some storm in my personality, sand sticking to skin, organic food, Waldorf traditions, seasonal living, cake for no reason in particular, traditional media such as TV and newspapers even though convience such as Blendle takes even me over, ata bags, ink-filled flowers, beach party's, beach bomfires, beach sleepovers, just beach, old Hollywood, old glam, chokers, car-drives to nowhere in particular (and when they get out of hand, you cross country borders and go searching for a hotel), but also just cruisin' for a few hours (especially over the afsluitdijk), sleeping under a naked sky, ceramics, making music, that forever-feeling with my man, glitter socks, sheer socks, coming of age films preferably with a protagonist trio, (coloured) glasswork, if there is a dinosaur edition of something even though I'm not twelve, living on the edge, living in peace, marathons (...the couch potato ones), creating, indulging in my stay at home-mom tendencies (baking, cooking, cleaning, waiting for your man to come home and make sure he's 'pleased'), but feminism, pilates, pottery, dunes, barre method, audio books, kite surfing, city life to indulge and nature to recharge, mirrors above beds, drawing and painting, cultural science studies, enjoying watching certain sports for years without having a proper clue, washed linnen home textile, poppy fields, festival feelings, a room with a view, mom jeans, anthurium, shimmery body lotion, dr. Hauschka & Weleda, rereading love letters, mail art, performance art, conceptual art, heempark & pluktuin, detoxifying, Mediterranean vacations, bathing together the Dreamers-style, waterfall showers, white & Lisbon tiles, street theater, champagne, running, essential oils, aromatherapy, knitting, la France, inventing recipes, Greek Islands, an impromptu gathering of friends, A. Vogel, whiskey, maquillage, cosmotology, wig-making, origami & paper art, rainy weather = hygge, spirit restaurants, my amature years of doing comedy improv theater and musicals, courgette pasta, rug hooking, smudging, writing, visiting the theatre, homemaking & home inprovement, the thoughtless intimcay of showering together with your most trusted female friends for coin-saving and other sisterhood practizes, black/white/green tea, planners, rituals & routines, blogging, when I briefly was in a comedy duo and writing sketches <3, christmas circus & fairs, perfumes with notes of citrus and vanilla, negative space, self-hypnosis, art & noise rock, often: avant-gardists, darts, meal prep, infinity pools, earrings obsession, kinetic light sculptures, face yoga, goal digging, marram grass, filigrain, posture training, antique paintings of a landscapes or city sights, thrifting, Dutch old town districts, Marken & waterland villages, celebrating Christmas in your twenties: fairy lights in house plants and having third Christmas days dinners with friends, wine tasting, big sunday breakfasts, (pub)quizzes, butterfly and bird spotting

jan 23 2015 ∞
feb 22 2021 +