I thought that if I found one healthy relationship, it would erase all of the abuse i endured in my past but that is false. I end up getting into similar patterns that I am actively seeking to get rid off. I help people at the expense of my own wellbeing and boundaries. I feel this person should be loyal to me if I've exerted this much energy. It comes not from a place of entitlment but of emotional labor pay-offs. I should never expect anything anymore. I will go on dates, casual flings where people don't know me but hopefully engaged enough to understand the world around them. I no longer need to find similar behaviroual characterstics as my father because I don't need his approval and validation anymore.

jul 19 2019 ∞
jul 19 2019 +
  • register for german class
  • be mindful of spending - budget and cook food!
  • yoga class weekly
  • muy thai or boxing class - try it out
  • meditate every day, force yourself at first
  • fundraise legal costs
  • legal work

research summer school rahul

jul 19 2019 ∞
jul 19 2019 +
  • answer amrit, dee. reply to pending messages on facebook
  • answer whatsapp messages from the past + present
  • reply to jonas valentin
  • clean seestrasse wedding. hoover. sinks. sea shells
  • finish howl and start another light novel this time
  • find old mp3 from metro madina and transfer music
  • dye hair blue
  • shave
  • new email plus tumblr
  • watch pina bausch videos
jul 19 2019 ∞
jul 19 2019 +