- 20160918 i feel fat and disgusting, i hate my reflection on the mirror // i want to give up life // i'm really tired at this point. i want to go on and get the victory, be persistent. but i also want to leave all behind and rest 6 feet under // i wish they did know how i feel. how much i want to die. but at the same moment i don't. i'm afraid of what they would possibly do. // i want to die but i don't want to transfer te pain to someone else
- 20160920 better today. // angry at my low concetration // angry when i got home and my room was a mess, but then everything was in it's right place
- 20160921 got sad about what d. zuleide said about me and that my life is too easy
- 20160924 i miss my father // i feel fat // i regret all my life choices lately
- 20160925 existencial crisis when i looked at jonathan's face and asked why he exists
- 20161001 i'm feeling really, really useless
- 20161003 existential crisis
- 20161008 existential crisis everyday
- 20161009 i really want to die
- 20161012 i feel sick all the time and it's a sickness that tends to a existential/reality crisis, cause i can't think of anything else // i'm so nervous and my heart skip beats all the time and i always feel like i said something wrong but i don't know exactly which part because i barely can remember what i just typed here
- 20161013 i feel sad that my teen years are almost gone
- 20161018 these thoughts i have before i fall asleep are killing me
- 20161022 cried a lot on the bath cause i have so much time and i'm so young and i still think i'm not and i have my own time to do things, i'm on my way to be great and i can't see it
- 20161025 i feel like i've been saying a lot of shit lately.
- 20161104 i'm sad about someone imposing his ideologies to me // i really wish the world was better or i was stronger and i didn't have a heartbreak for everything
- 20161117 i'm coming out of my cage and i've been doing just fine
- 20161126 everything is beautiful and nothing hurts (except my fucking muscles)
- 20161208 had a panic attack and i was so desperate and somehow i felt heartbroken. i felt sad for being so weak and felt sad because it happened
- 20161211 i really wish everyone would stop fighting me
- 20161215 i feel so stupid, i shouldn't let an idiot like someone who is friends with karla do that to me
- 20161220 i feel so bad right now. i hope everything stops soon. // this christmas doesn't feel like christmas at all, it feels like despair.
- 20161224 no christmas feels. // fat fat fat fat fat fat
- 20161225 vaguely christmas. something like chrismas, but not christmas. more like just a sunday or other holiday
- 20161228 i love it when my mom destroys my dreams saying i'm too fat for it.
sep 18 2016 ∞
jan 5 2017 +