• 1. what is your idea of perfect happiness?

october 29th, 2020. i imagine that a perfectly happy version of myself would have learned how to see the beauty in everything, all the time. she would have learned to stop shaming herself and others on a daily basis. she would have learned to get off of her phone and take care of herself and be more present in her own life. she would have learned how to forgive herself and she would have mastered the art of loving herself to the fullest extent. i imagine that she would do all of the things that she always talks and dreams of doing. she would actively and fully pursue her plight of happiness in order to create and maintain a safe, comfortable, pleasant experience on this planet. she would continue to pour herself into others, i'm sure, but now viewing herself as the one who comes first. i hope with all i have that one day she will have overcome her inhibitions in order to live more freely. she will wake up every morning and feel happy, present, and eager; wherever she may be. whether she be on her own or with a partner. she will get out of bed and eat every day. she will wash her face daily and she will brush her teeth twice daily and hopefully she will shower more often. she will find rhythm and routine in her life and performing normal every day tasks will come to her more naturally. she will keep her life and living space clean and organized because those are the conditions under which her brain functions the best. true happiness comes from within, and i live by that. i've just got to coax it out.