hahahahaha the perpetual feeling of not being heard and having your interests diminished compared to others hahahahaha the eternal feeling of not being loved or respected as others are loved or respected hahahahaha the visceral feeling that i can't unleash when people keep asking "why?" about things when obviously other people wouldn't be asked any of it. normalize the jealous guilt, i'm not mad jealous at someone, i'm sad jealous at them. i don't want to be them and i want what they have and i think it's unfair that they have it and i don't but i know it's not their fault.