- GLaDOS: Oh. Hi. So. How are you holding up? Because I'm a potato! [slow clap] Oh, good. My slow clap processor made it into this thing.
- GLaDOS: Well, what does a neck-bearded old engineer know about fashion? He probably— Oh, wait. It's a she. Still, what does she know? Oh wait, it says she has a medical degree. In fashion! From France!
- GLaDOS: You know what my days used to be like? I just tested. Nobody murdered me, or put me in a potato, or fed me to birds. I had a pretty good life. And then you showed up. You dangerous, mute, lunatic. And you know what? You win. Just go.
- Wheatley: It's not out of the question that you might have a very minor case of serious brain damage. But don't be alarmed, alright? Although, if you do feel alarm, try to hold onto that feeling because that is the proper reaction to being told you have brain damage.
- Wheatley: Finally, a nemesis worthy of my vast intellect. Holmes versus Moriarty... Aristotle versus mashy spike plate!
- Cave Johnson: Alright, I've been thinking. When life gives you lemons, don't make lemonade. Make life take the lemons back! Get mad! I don't want your damn lemons! What am I supposed to do with these?! Demand to see life's manager! Make life rue the day it thought it could give Cave Johnson lemons! Do you know who I am? I'm the man who's gonna burn your house down! With the lemons! I'm gonna get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that burns your house down!
- Fact Sphere: Marie Curie invented the theory of radioactivity, the treatment of radioactivity, and dying of radioactivity.
- Wheatley: You two are going to love this big surprise. In fact, you might say that you're both going to love it to death. Love it... until it kills you. Until you're dead.
Alright? I don't know whether you're picking up on what I'm saying there, but...
- Cave Johnson: Alright this next test may involve trace amounts of time travel. So, word of advice: If you meet yourself on the testing track, don't make eye contact. Lab boys tell me that'll wipe out time. Entirely. Forward and backward. So do both of yourselves a favor and just let that handsome devil go about his business.
- Cave Johnson: The bean counters told me I couldn't fire a man just for being in a wheelchair. Did it anyway! Ramps are expensive.
- Cave Johnson: I've got some advice from the boys down in the lab for those of you who got covered in the repulsion gel" *paper rustling* "Do not get covered in the repulsion gel. We haven't entirely nailed down what element it is yet, but I'll tell you this: It's a lively one and it does not like the human skeleton.
- Cave Johnson: They're telling me I should stop making these prerecorded messages. That gave me an idea, make more prerecorded messages!
- Cave Johnson: Those of you who volunteered to be injected praying mantis DNA, I have some good news and some bad news: bad news is we've postponed these test indefinitely. Good news is we've got a much better test for you: fighting an army of mantis men! Pick up a rifle and follow the yellow line. You'll know when the test starts.
- GLaDOS: "Federal regulations require me to inform you that the next test chamber... is looking pretty good."
apr 27 2011 ∞
nov 12 2011 +
