• Him - "You seem familiar. Don't take this the wrong way, but it's your arrogance that's familiar"

Me - "It's not arrogance, it's confidence. Now give me some of your pizza."

• "I know I'm a ho, but you should wear your jeans tighter"
• "The only thing more pathetic than foot wrestling on a Friday night is watching a foot wrestle on a Friday night"
• To a random guy telling us useless irrelevant stuff about his mate "Good story"
• "Of course dating is uncomfortable without drinking. How are you supposed to build rapport without alcohol?!"