• Sometimes I get the urge to bite things.
  • I would make a great vampire.
• Things I like to bite:
  • People. (Mainly Evan.)
  • Nerf.
  • Anything squishy.
  • The silicon case for my phone.
  • The covers for the Wii-motes.
• I once had the urge to pop the zit on my managers neck. It was a big one.
• On season 3 of 24, the Season Finale, when Jack Bauer throws the very, very deadly virus in the fridge and it explodes, yeah, I would have the urge to open the fridge.
• To spin the wheel at Santa Fe Red's that specifically said, "Do Not Spin."
• Anyone who talks about playing Call of Duty, I want to ask if they play online wit...

Evan Patrick Cook.

• My husband. Clearly I am in love with him. I even have a list dedicated to why I love him.

Jim Halpert.

• The Office.
• a) His sense of humor. b) He's so damn cute. c) His personality.

Seely Booth.

• Bones.
• Love his face and the way he is in love with Bones. Evan better look at me like that.

Sawyer.

• Lost.
• My new love. I don't know why I like him. Maybe it's because he's a bad boy. Or maybe it's because he's so damn good looking. Whatever it is, he is my absolute favo...

• Vacuuming my carpet. Especially when there are crunchy things to be vacuumed up.
• Cleaning my computer or TV screen.
• Cleaning the bathroom mirror.
• Cleaning MY toilet. I love cleaning MY toilet but not anyone else's.
• Rearranging rooms.
• New blog posts from my subscriptions.
• Evan being all cute wearing his hat and playing his Madden. <3
• Spending an evening alone.
• Having a day off.
• Search engines that pre-guess what you are writing, as you are typing.

• The time he pushed me down the Rims....and then asked me out.
• One time, I was asking him what he wanted for lunch and he said, "It's your turce." I started laughing and said, "What?" And he said, "I was gonna say 'turn,' but I said 'choice,' so turce." Every time I think of that, I can't stop laughing.
• The time I got incredibly inebriated and got out of my car and started crawling around a random lawn asking Evan if he wanted to see my butt.
• When Evan talks in his sleep.
• I should make an entire list dedicated to what he says when he talks in his sleep. BRB.
  • http://listography.com/lovesonmylistofth..._/when_he_talks_in_his_sleep
• That time in Florida, when we walked to Wallgreens and sang "Somebody to Love" (The Glee version) the entire way there. (We...

• Playing drinking Jenga at that random kid's house.
• Stealing a Jenga piece because we are funny. (Mine says Dicks.) She also stole an eraser.
• When she locked herself in the bathroom at my house and upon getting out said, "Cute thong." Because I accidentally left my panties just hangin out on my bathroom floor for everyone to view. And this was at like 12 am. After everyone, including boys had already used my bathroom. Bahaha good thing they were cute panties!
• When Erin kicked that girl in the leg -----WITH HEELS ON----- because that girl was being a beeeeotch.
• That one time we ate at Out Back and our server was soooooo awkward. And he made Erin show her id twice: once to get alcohol and again to make sure it was her credit card.

• Hot feeties.
  • This is the worst. First of all, I swear they expand like 3 sizes when they get hot. And, since my feet are 99% of the time always freezing, this is just especially uncomfortable.
• When you have to sneeze but can't.
  • And so you look all special with your watery eyes that won't open all the way.
• When I'm driving to work and I know without a shadow of a doubt that I forgot something...but I can't remember what.
• Putting an extremity into scalding hot water. And it makes your body tingle. Ew.
• Pins and needles. More specifically, when your extremity is completely asleep and it hurts. Not the little baby pins and needles.
• Things between my toes. Gross. Except for...

• You know how girls punch guys when they flirt? Yeah, I still do that. It's like an uncontrollable gut reaction when guys joke around with me. I have to punch them. Not hard, mind you. Then I feel bad. Because everyone and their dog knows that is how girls flirt. And they probably think I'm flirting. And I'm married....And that is really awkward for me...
• One time, I bought this really nice, soft, polar fleece jacket, and this girl, Charene (ug, Charene) kept rubbing her face on it because it was so soft and nice. Seriously. It was my sophomore year, and she kept rubbing her face on my arm and her makeup was ALL OVER. Later on I was bitching to my friend while we were in the bathroom and when I opened the door to my stall there was Charene. Oh hey. Oooopssieee.
• When I was little, I was pretty sure I wa...

• Avatar 3-D.
• Zombieland.
• Shutter Island.
• Bride Wars.
• Clash of the Titans 3-D.
• Funny People.
• Iron Man 2.
• Dinner for Schmucks. (Fell in love with Steve Carell. Seriously.)
• Inception. (Dumb.)
• Date Night.
  • Uhm, that's amazing Jeremy, but I'm going to go home and fart in a shoe box.
  • Best. Movie. Ever.

• Scott Hamilton, in Pasadena, CA, at an ice skating camp. He signed my ice skates and he helped me perfect my axle. Love him.
• Fog Hat. I served them at Olive Garden. They were hilarious and so, so nice. They tip so-so, if you're wondering. Also, I asked if they were a band because everyone made me, and I thought the guy said "Fall Cat" because of his accent. My bartender figured it out for me.
• Cartel. I served them, too. They are not that big and they think they are the shit. Even though I do like them. They all ordered martinis and fancypants drinks. They tipped so-so, too, and most of them were kind of rude.
• Something October Something. I didn't serve them but was serving the other tables near them. They are some "big" myspace band. They all had their asses hanging out ...

The funniest things that have ever come out of the mouth of my most favorite professor. <3

• "...with you and your cats."-student
  • "Cat. I am not a crazy cat lady."-Weiss
• "Feb 3."
• "I drugged them before you got here."
• "See ya undergrads nice knowin ya."
• "How can men be rebellious?"-Katie Joy
  • "Abandon your family!!!"-Weiss
• "Let me just talk while I chew with my mouth full. Ok I'll swallow."
• "Blahdy, blahdy, blahdy, blah."
• "Our children will grow up to be little psychopaths. I overstate."
• "I don't usually mark up papers in my on-line classes, so if you haven't had me live, you're in for a treat."
• "If you don't like your grade, don't cry ...

• My dad is freaking crazy. He is the mailman of bike riders. He will ride his bike to work, rain, snow, sleet, or shine. My dad would probably ride his bike to the moon if God would let him.
• My house is approx. 10ish miles to his work. That's 20 freakin miles there and back. Oh, and he leaves for work at like 3 am. So, I tend to run into him when I'm arriving home from the bars. Love.
• One time, I did this thing called "search" during my junior year of high school. It was basically like Catholic jail, where they lock you up and steal your crap and do church. It's actually fun. Anyway. When you sign up they send out a letter to family and friends asking them for letters to give to you and the letter my dad wrote I couldn't even read because I was crying so hard. It's actually a song about this dad checking on his daughter one nig...

• Playing "Who's that?!" with my puppies in the parking lot of a store.
  • While Evan runs inside for something. I don't just go and do that for fun...
• When Evan surprises me with coffee before class.
• My Beauty and the Beast folder that I use for COMT 230.
  • Hi, I'm in college and yes this folder is from first grade. Pack rat.
• Crossing things off my to-do list.
  • Like finding a DJ. Check.
• Rearranging my room.
• Finding a misspelling or grammatical error in a book, magazine, syllabus, etc; which I am surprisingly good at.
• Finding a movie goof; again, I am surprisingly good.

• Clipping my toe nails. It is a weird feeling, almost a hurt. And I just plain don't like it.
• Washing my face when I'm not in the shower. Sometimes, I will specifically take a shower just for this reason. I feel like it's still not clean. Also, I make a mess. Water gets all over my sink and counter areas, the floor, my hair, my clothes, etc. You get the picture. It would be ten million times faster and easier to just take a freakin shower.
• Driving. Evan is my personal chauffeur. I pretty much only like driving when I'm alone. And doing something by myself. If I am going to Evan's house I will want him to drive because then when I'm half awake in the morning and I have to go home, he can drive.
• My hair. It takes for-ev-er. I wish I could shower and go. Stupid curly hair.

• if i am doing homework, and have multiple internet windows open, i cannot close my internet. i would rather leave it open for a long period of time that bookmark everything and have to re-open multiple tabs.
• i usually sleep with my eyes open. sometimes, i wake myself up right as i'm falling asleep, but i won't have to open my eyes. it freaks me out. and i can't help it.
  • therefore, i usually sleep with my arm over my face slash eyes. and it smushes my eye lashes and sometimes they look retarded.
    • thank God for mascara and eye lash curlers.
• i sleep in one teeny tiny little area of my gigantic bed. the rest is covered in n...

• knowing that i'm going to have to be in a specific lane for an upcoming turn and not being in that lane immediately.
  • that probably makes zero sense. basically, if i have to make a right hand turn, and i'm in the left lane, i get real nervous until i'm in the correct lane.
• driving behind people.
• people driving behind me.
  • both of these things because no one knows how to drive besides me and i do not want to be caught behind, in front of, between some stupid idiot.
• blind intersections.
  • because people have to park their stupid car at the corner or they have some massive 900 year old tree covering it up.
• messes and clutter. i cannot live in thos...

• when you call someone else by the wrong name.
• when you try to say one thing but end up combining words.
  • tonight i was trying to say i was slacking off, but said lagging in my head, so it came out, "slagging off." fail.
• when you mix up the first letters of words, which i do a lot because i talk fast.
  • like san fransisco. the other day i said, "fran sansisco." i'm dumb.
• when people call you the wrong name but you don't correct them because
  • you have a name tag on.
  • they've been calling you the wrong name for so long it's way too late.
• when your server tells you to have a nice dinner, and you say, "you too" out of ha...

• We have each, at some point in time, worked at the Olive Garden at the same time as a family member.
• We pretty much hate all the same people.
• We all serve and togo.
• Brown hair.
• Jamie and I are in the "my boyfriend's name is Evan club."
• Erin and I love exaggerated numbers.
• Jamie and I love video games.
• Jamie and I love pretty much all the same shows.
  • Minus That 70's Show.
• We are bitches.
• We love games.
• We love alcohol.
• We do not call each other "honey" or "babe" or other stupid pet names like that.
• Soon, we'll all use the same mascara. And love it.

• losing entire documents on word.
  • so i save my progress like every other second.
• having toilet paper stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
  • so embarrassing and tacky.
• having my dress tucked into my underwear.
  • i've never actually had this happen, but i have seen it several times at work. which is pretty much enough to make me quadruple check myself before leaving the stall.
• having something attached to my back.
  • not in the sense that someone stuck a "kick me" sign on my back.
  • but, like, maybe there was a spider in my...

this should be a good one.

• my rotator cuff.
  • by diving for a volley ball in front of like 15 high school volleyball players slash trying to teach them how to not be lazy. fail.
• my 2002 honda.
  • by not realizing there was ice on the bridge slash ignoring a call from my manager and plowing into the guard rail. then getting smashed into from behind. (that sounds so dirty....)
• my favorite picture frame with the most amazing pictures from the philippines.
  • by shutting my sock drawer.
• my second cell phone.
  • i was mad at the TV so i threw it. bahaha...

• carried the olympic tourch
• been to africa
• gotten a tattoo
• gotten a dog
• sponsored third world chidren
• learned how to play 4 instruments
• lived alone
• bought a car
• adopted a dog
• eaten gross and abnormal things
  • chicken heart
  • shark
  • belut
  • sword fish
• survived a school shooting lockdown
• gotten married.
• Kissed a giraffe.

• Going places alone.
  • And thinking about going places alone.
• Sometimes, when I'm in the shower, I'll think about all the scary movies I've seen, and I'll convince myself that a creepy ghosty killer is standing in my bathroom ready to kill me. The cgk isn't going to kill me until I look out one side of the curtain OR turn my back to the curtain. So I can't get out. I have to make Evan come in the bathroom for me to be able to turn off the shower and get out.
• Spiders. Duh.
• Going to downtown bars. I swear I am going to get shot or stabbed. Or worse, Evan will.
• Houses "in the middle of no where." That is just asking to be serial murdered.
• We have these paper shades in our bedroom and there is a big treebush outside of o...

• Acoustic.
• Adoption.
• BBM.
• Billings.
• Blogs.
• Board games.
• Books.
• Boots.
• Braids.
• Bubble baths.
• Brothers. (Especially the little ones.)
• Cats. (Not really, but I do like MY cat.)
• Christmas.
• Compassion.
• Compliments.
• Dates.
• Dogs. (But not really mine at the moment.)
• Easter.
• Elephants.

• A baby.
  • Yes, that's right. Baby fever.
• A house.
  • Renting is overrated and stupid.
• A job.
  • Real jobs are not overrated. I want a reaaalllllllluhhhhh job. A real, live one.
• A new car for Evan.
  • Preferably a Range Rover or a FJ Cruiser or a Element. Something pretty that I can steal.
• A Blackberry Bold.
  • Because Evan just got one and it's nicer than my Curve and I don't like when he has nicer things than me and so I want it.
• A mixer, a new oven, stocked cupboards, and one of those kitchenaid mixer things.

Let's start with the obvious: OCD.

• It is getting to the point where I have issues eating at OG because they don't use gloves to clean the dishes. I don't want their skin cells lingering on my dishes and transferring to my food and transferring to my mouth.
  • This is terrible, but I'm going to say it. If certain people are working, I refuse to eat there. I just can't imagine they are too terribly clean. And I want to be healthy.
• Other problems I have with my current state of OCD:
  • Touching the sink in my house. It is not stainless steel, it's white, ceramic? IDK. But it is stained, and old, and gross feeling. Can't touch.
  • Touching the countertops. They are linole...

• The time that super skinny dude danced with two chicks 5 times his weight and walked away with a boner.
• The time Jamie drank the fish egg vase filler ball things and then spit it out all over the table. Like 6 times.
• The time we went to the Carlin and Amber was trying to get us all to come dance with her. First of all, the Carlin is where all the drug dealing football players hang out and shoot each other. Second, they stand on the outside of the dance floor and prey on young girls. So, she was out there dancing like a gay man because she only goes to the gay bar. Then, she came over to us, and started using me as a pole. Love my life.
• That one time we ate at Out Back and our server was soooo awkward. And he butted into every conversation, but mostly the convo about having too many facebook friend...

• My Mercury Mariner, Simon. (Who is gay.)
• Evan's Camry, Camr. (Because the letters on the back that spell out Camry started to fall off. And for the longest time it was just those 4. But now they're all gone so....it's still Camr.)
• The man who lives downstairs, Phil. (He is inanimate because he refuses to talk to us, make eye contact with us, or act like any civilized human being should. Since we don't know his name, I named him Philip.)
• Phil moved. Now "Michael" lives down there, but we call him Jermy. As in Jeremy, but we like to say Jermy.

• Stolen from Jamie.<3

July

• Graduating!!! Four more days!!

August

• Applying to substitute teach.
• Job searching. Serious.

September

• Evan's birthday.
• Not going back to school.

October

• Ethiopia!!!!
• Kayla's 21st.

November

• Thanksgiving.
• Hopefully finding a new job!

December

• Spending an entire 7 days with the love of my life. There were no distractions, whether those tend to be people or work or whatever, it was him and I together always.
• Disney. Nothing beats Disney. Because we got to act like we were 5 years old and no one judged us.
• Roller coasters. Yep, Disney has bomb.com roller coasters. And we got to ride most of them more than once. And he held my hand the entire time while becoming deaf because I scream like a baby.
• Um, duh. =]
• Sun. Can't go wrong with a lot of vitamin D!
• Shorts. I never wear shorts. And I forgot how much I love shorts. And the sweet tan lines they give you.
• Tan lines. Again, love.
• Walking. Because you have to walk everywhere.

• "The road outside my house is paved with good intentions." Hum Hallelujah
• "I thought I loved you, and it was just how you looked in the light." Hum Hallelujah
• "Sometimes we take chances, sometimes we take pills." Hum Hallelujah
• "The best of us can find happiness in misery." I Don't Care
• "The truth hurts worse than anything I could bring myself to do to you." I've got all this ringing in my ears and none on my fingers
• "Do you remember the way I held your hand? Under the lamp post and ran home this way so many times I could close my eyes." I've got all this ringing in my ears and none on my fingers
• "Have you ever wanted to disappear?" 20 Dollar Nosebleed
• "It's not me, it's you." 20 Dollar Nosebleed
• "Untie the balloons from around my neck and ground me." 20 Dollar Nosebleed
• "You can only blame your problems on my w..._The Shipped Gold Standard_

• That Mr. Mike Griffin who is apparently our new landlord will not return our calls or e-mails. And since the house is ours this upcoming Thursday we kind of need keys, rent, all that jazz.
  • Mr. Mike Griffin just answered my phone call because it was from MY phone and not Evan's. Bitch.
• I need to take my Spanish test so I can graduate. I haven't even begun studying. Crap.
• I have a speech to write by Tuesday. Nine to 11 minutes. FML. I am so over this semester.
• I have a paper to re-do by Wednesday. I kinda failed the first paper. Oopise. I am so over this semester.
  • Finito.
• I need to get in shape and lose some weig...

• The nicknames I give for him. Currently, I call him Nicole. Mostly because I always wanted a sister.
  • He also answers to it. And calls me Larry. hahah ew
• How hard of a worker he is. Especially toward football.
• One time, when I was doing some sit ups, he told me he would "kill my abs." Henceforth, he's my trainer. It's bomb.com because I do workouts while he drinks pop and plays COD:MW. Also, he's ripped out of his mind.
• When I lived on my own, he'd randomly show up to my house and party with me and be friends with my friends.
• He will take me to work when I don't want to drive.
• How God accidentally put him in this time period. He's suppose to be in the Wild W...

I seriously will someday look these people up and go pee on their car. Plus other things, too.

• Callie Farrar.
• Brenda Dianne Hagstrom.
• Ladonna Sanderson.
• Deborah K. Jacobs.
• Ratcliff R. Eappr.
• Wendy Wells.
• Angela Pria.
• Marilyn Lindell.
• Marlycee Larkin.
• Tina Hoiness.
• Joshua Webb.
• Mark Sorg.
• Kaycee Jo Witte.
• Barbara Henderson McGraw.
• Marilyn Sullivan.
• Jeff Kitto.
• Brenna Bishop.
• Neva Schock.

• Get a hair cut.
• Dye my hair.
• Paint.
• Create.
• Write speech.
• Contact Arbonne lady.
• Find a new job.
• Marriage license.
• New passport.
  • A. This blows. Now all my old stamps will be gone. =[
  • B. This costs 95 dollars. Plus they try and talk you into getting a passport card, which is a glorified drivers license that let's you enter the US from sea or land ports. And costs like 60 dollars extra. Nope.
• New drivers license.
• Bank sitch.
• Order new checks.

• Chewing on a piece of food and realizing you're also chewing on hair. Oh my gosh. One of the worst feelings slash realizations in the world. Especially when you know it is not your hair.
• Dog food: the smell, the way it looks, the texture, the sound of dogs eating it, etc. Especially if a piece gets in the dogs water and it gets all soggy and puffy. Sick.
• Watching people chew with their mouths open and full of food. Seriously. Close the trap.
• Blood. Not bleeding, wounds, gashes, cuts, etc, but seeing blood on tissues, towels, etc, hate.
• Spit.
• Touching the toilet seat, and toilet in general. Even my own. It is a vile thing and I prefer to have nothing to do with it.
• Wet clothes. Especially the end of pants....

• he will sing to me whenever I ask. And when I sing in return he never ever tells me I suck.
• he massages my feeties on a nightly basis.
• he lets me shower at his house. First.
• he lets me steal his clothes until he has no more gym shorts/sweats/pajama bottoms left.
• he watches all my tv shows and loves them as much as I do.
• he walks me to my door at night when he takes me home because he knows how scared I am.
• he took me to the hospital to see my mom and held me in the ER.
• he is my personal chauffeur. And doesn't complain.
• he gives really good massages.
• he takes me to work even when he doesn't work.

• waking up before my alarm goes off
• laughing out loud while reading a book
• someone telling you that you smell good
• when i come home to washed sheets and a made bed
• when my mom makes my bed because she does it perfectly (fleece blankie beneath the sheet, and a million blankets on top)
• going for a walk and meeting friendly people
• finding leftovers in the fridge from a great restaurant that say "please eat" on them
• finding things in pockets (i.e. chapstick, money, earrings, etc)
• having pretty, long, sculpted nails (real ones, not fake)
• being tired at an early hour
• mail
• big impulse buys
• rereading a book and finding all my highl...

• jamie moving to town
• finishing this stupid semester
• starting my final semester on campus
  • and finishing said semester!!!
• getting married
• doing my internship
• honeymoon
• back to ethiopia
• graduating
• erin coming home for breaks
  • check. now let's hang out!
• erin student teaching here
• having real friends for once in my life
• getting a "joint" e-mail address when we get married.
  • so cute =]
• becoming a sub. and if that goes well, then going back to get my elem ed certifica...

• flossing my teeth so hard my gums hurt good the next day
• the way my teeth feel after i go to the dentist
• popping bubble wrap with my mouth
• plucking the random hairs i missed from shaving
• licking envelopes
• going to bed immediately after a hot shower
• the way fleece pajamas feel against cold skin
• medicated chapstick
• icy hot
• the heavyness of the 7 blankets i sleep with
• how weird it is to rearrange your room and sleep in it that night
• getting a running start and dive bombing the bed.
• responding to the people who "wrong numbe...

and probably don't want to either. but that's okay.

• i've never, ever had a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. when i was little, and that was like the only staple available in any other house, i would tell my friend's moms that i was allergic to peanut butter. and my friends thought i was allergic. and then one day my mom told them the truth. but i still never ate a pb&j.
• i think that i don't like pb&j because i have an issue with bread. i like toast. bread makes me nervous because it gets all soggy and in your teeth and you have to chew it approximately 953 times.
• i have some curse where i can't really have a best friend. i mean i can, but for like a 2 day period. after that, something goes wrong. but boys? boys are different. i pretty much have almost the same boy friends as always. it's changed a little,...

Since starting my new job, I have found my favorite person to be the sweet little Norwegian alterations lady. She's like the Dr. Weiss of the DB.

I have a list in my phone but I need a more permanent place for them. And they need to be shared with the whole world.

• "Do you know what they call Laurel? A horse shit town."
• "On top of that she was from Laurel. I should have known she was from Laurel. They are a different species there."
• "Did you shave your pits today?" -me
  • "Not before I came to America. They made me or they wouldn't let me in." -Bjorg
• "You shouldn't ever be a cop. You like to point things at me and you would shoot everyone." -Bjorg to me. And she's probably true.
• "Do you wear pajamas?" -me

(Thanks, Pandora, for the best Jack Johnson station. <3<3<3)

• Van Morrison, Crazy Love.
• Jack Johnson, My Little Girl.
• Jason Mraz, You and Me.
• Joshua Radin, Everything'll be Alright.
• Ben Harper, Walk Away.

Let me just preview this list by saying, I am the worst at finishing a book. I will start it 16 times before actually finishing it. I get bored really easy. So, that is why I am always currently reading 104 books for 334 years.

Finished

• Dress Your Family in Corduroy and Denim. David Sedaris .
• Happy Birthday, or Whatever. Annie Choi .
  • PS. I also found a terrible misprint and I'm so excited about it. She totally typed out "abouthim" and did not space between the words. Fairly obvious; yet, I still found it.
• Me Talk Pretty One Day. David Sedaris.
• Boneman's Daughter. Ted Dekker.
• She Got Up Off The Couch. Haven Kimmel .
• Are You There Vodka? It's Me Chelsea. Chelsea Handler .
• Chelsea Chelsea Bang Bang. Chelsea Handler .
• My Horizontal Life. Chelsea Handler.

• When you are with someone, you shave little pieces of yourself away so you fit together. And one day you look up and you don't recognize yourself anymore.
• Sometimes, I am Meredith Grey. And Evan is Derek Shepherd. And I push him away because I don't know how to accept things and work through my past issues.
• "Bones break, organs burst, flesh tears. We can sew the flesh, repair the damage, ease the pain. But when life breaks down, when we break down, there’s no science, no hard and fast rules. We just have to feel our way through."
• Everyone needs to have a person.
• In another life, I was a surgeon. Because I suddenly know all about it and talk like I am one. Espec to my mother. Who is one. She just laughs because I honestly know nothing. But it's funny nonetheless.
• Grey's Anatomy has thee best soundtrack t...

• Dead weight. I can play dead like no body's business. I'm so good I could probably win an Oscar. And if anyone should get caught by a carnivorous animal looking for food and thus find the need to play dead, that person should be me. Because I am so good at it.
• Pretending I'm on the phone. People always think I'm on the phone.
  • Also, this isn't that useless, because sometimes it's handy to avoid eye contact with people and thus avoid any awkward situations that might ensue. And when I leave work, I like to pretend I'm on my phone to ward off any potential rapists and junk.
• Stuffing a lot of things into little or cramped spaces. I can make anything fit anywhere. I dare you to try me.
• Sleeping all day, everyday. Useless because I should get up and get on with my life. But I'm too lazy.

• Wheat Thins.
• Pretzels.
• Icee from Target.
• Billings Best Yogurt.
• Drinks.
• Lila, my cat, when she was a kitten. And technically it was the drive-in, but I'm still counting it because pets are illegal at the drive in.
• People. Again at the drive in.

Yes. I was an ice skater. And I was damn good, too. And I miss it almost as much as I miss my Ethiopian children.

• Your Song , Elton John
• Paint It Black , Vanessa Carlton
• X's and O's (An American Girl) , Trisha Yearwood
• Where Are You Christmas? , Faith Hill
• There You'll Be , Faith Hill

• One time, when we were first dating, probably 6ish months into our relationship, his parents went out of town, leaving him home alone for the weekend. I told my parents I was at a friend's house and spent the night at Evan's. I was so paranoid that we were going to get caught and that was all we would talk about. So, in the middle of the night Evan woke up saying, "I just talked to Bonnie." (Bonnie's my mom.) I started freaking out because I thought she had come to the door or something. No. Just Evan being a dick in his dream.
• One time, while watching a movie, Evan fell asleep. He woke up really pissed off and yelling, "I DON'T EVEN HAVE AN IPOD." Literally, yelling. Hilarious.
• Other topics of Evan's sleep-talk:
  • Lobsters.

• Travel. Seriously my least favorite thing in the history of the world. Sitting in one area for like 5 hours is so 2009. Let's get it together people.
• Sales tax. What is the point of that? I don't live there. I don't benefit from the extra 10% I just had to pay you.
• Our hotel. If there is ever a bad review on a website, just listen to it.
• Moldy shower curtain. Everyone knows I don't do germs. Or dirty. Or mold. Especially in a place where I am suppose to be getting clean. So when there is mold on a shower curtain, I tend to get really upset.
• Wake up calls. Does 7 am mean 7 am in Florida? Or is that just a Montana thing? Because pretty sure when I call for a 7 am wake up call, I want to be woken up at 7. Not 8, 9, 10, or never. Thank youuuu.
• Shuttle. Listen to me. If I have to be somewhere at a specific time for your convenience, ...

• When the entrance to Walmart's bathroom is a maze. Listen up, I don't want to run into 45 people when I am about to pee my pants because you have 98 blind corners walking into that place.
  • Also, if I'm drunk, it is 10 times harder. So can you please fix that? Thank you.
  • How hard is it to have a door like every other normal store?
• Those people who refuse to buckle their kids in.
  • I swear. You are just asking for me to run you over or something.
• Those people who put ME on hold. As if I have nothing better to do than for you to leave me hanging.
• Obama 08 stickers.
  • Bahahaa

• When my cat tried to bite me when I was brushing him, he said, "I'll stick that brush in your butt if you don't behave." To the cat. Not me. It was so funny.
• My brother was taking his sweet time getting home, so my dad told me to tell him, "If he's got clothes on, tell him to just meet us there." Bahaha and to that my brother said, "No I'm driving around God damn naked course I got clothes on what the hell kinda question is that?"
• My dad was trying to see if the washer worked, so he needed a hose with a special end on both ends, so he said, "I need a double edge hose. The kind with two females parts."
• He was digging up my lawn and I handed him a beer and he said, "You're causing me to drink this beer really fast." My dad. Said this. hahahahaha
• I was talking on the phone to my dad, whe...

Since the previous tenants are dumb ass bitches, even though they're men, and decided to do a crappy job of moving out, I'm venting.

• First of all, when you shower, there is a reason there is a fan in the bathroom. Also a reason the fan turns on when the light is on. The reason? So mold doesn't freaking grow on the ceiling.
  • So guess who got to clean that up? Ho yeah, me.
• Second, in any other place I have lived, you are not allowed to just leave things behind. "Hey, I don't want these 33 fish tanks, this box of gadgets, this car window scraper, or this scarecrow. I'll leave them behind because I'm sure the next person will use them." FALSE.
  • If you didn't want your shit, throw it aw...

• "Well I've seen you as a boy before, and you were hot so it's okay." (Laurie S. 4.1.09)
• "You're missing an 'I love Obama' rally right now, and how stupid the average American is...you know I'm in love..." (Tyler K. 4.2.09)
• "Remember when L was making a drug deal while we were there? Lol, weird." (Jamie U. 7.7.09)
• "How did it happen? Were you chewing on Snap's bone?" (My mom. 7.7.09)
  • Clarification: Snap is my dog. Her bone is her rawhide chew, not her... you know. Also, I chipped my tooth. That is what "how did it happen" refers to.
• "Haha gurlll I wish I could but you know how your girl do. Gots ta go to Yellowstone tomorrow. Leaving at 5." (Jamie U. 7.11.09)

• The funny things she says. Like yesterday, when she was telling me how the customs people went through her entire purse and all her luggage, she wanted to tell them that there was a dirty tampon in there. Ok first of all, who says that? My mom. Second, LAUGH out LOUD.
• That she calls me her darling daughter.
• That she supports me to no end. When I thought I should go to Bozeman she was with me. When I decided to stay home she didn't fight it. When I was accepted to FIDM she was nervous but so excited. When I chose to stay here she was so happy that I wasn't leaving her.
• When people are mean to me she suggests ways for me to be better than them.
• I like to use the phrase, "I'll pee on your car" when someone pisses me off. She once told me that she'd help.
• The fact that she told me, "You're going ...

• Write him hand written notes.
• Send him cute pictures of me. Or put them as the background on his phone.
• Not leave my clothes at his house. On the floor.
• Same goes for my makeup and hair products.
• But I don't put those on the floor...
• Walk his dog.
• Stop nagging.
• Stop setting my plates down with the intention of cleaning them later. Do it right away.
• Stop asking him to do things for me.
• Watch shows he wants to watch and spend my alone time watching shows I want to watch.
• Compliment him on his weight-loss as much as possible.
• Buy him new clothes. That fit.
• Get a wii-mote charger.

• People who do wedding pictures before the wedding. Like with the bride and the groom. I believe in not seeing each other until the bride walks down the aisle.
• Vegetarians. I wish I could do it, I really do. But I don't understand how people live without beef and chicken. Especially chicken. But beef, too. Like, yum.
• When females drink beer. Because I hate it so much, it's weird that other females like it.
• When people do not wash their face immediately upon getting in the shower. I cannot stand the feeling of my makeup and work grease staying on my face for more than absolutely necessary.
• People who don't want kids. But I guess whatever.
  • What is even worse, is people who hate kids. And who tell you you shouldn't have k...

• horsey rides from my dad
• the pink egg that matched my dad's pink shirt
  • oh, the 80's...
• not being able to say my "r's."
  • which is basically my favorite thing ever.
• how happy my family was.
  • i cannot stop smiling now, knowing how much my parents adored me.
• being a brat.
  • some things never change.
• playing nurse, and pulling slivers out of my dad's fingers.
• my fave shirts:
  • billoon, tmnt, mickey, and penguin

• bothering me when i am crabby pants.
  • like right now.
  • pms much?
• having annoying friends, your friends, not mine. mine are perfect. (<3 you three)
  • and when i tell you, and you get mad at me.
  • excuse me for having an opinion.
• interrupting me.
  • oh my gosh. i will probably just stop talking to you for a week all together, since obviously you don't care what i have to say anyway.
• snoring.
  • if i do not get a good night's rest i will be the bitchiest person on the face of the planet. so let me fall asleep before ...

• when sharon shouted across the alley at me, "did your mom's purse get stolen when she was attacked? I MEAN STABBED? WHEN SHE WAS STABBED!?"
  • ok let's let the whole world know. bitch.
  • and she was comparing my mom's attempted murder attack to her car getting broken into and her purse getting stolen. NOT THE SAME THING. especially since he didn't take my mom's purse.
• when tully told me that the reason i was crying was dumb.
  • first of all, you made me cry. so you called yourself dumb. i win.
  • second, i hear you have a little dick.
• my rudey rude table getting mad that i wouldn't let their 2 year old drink out of a wine glass so they left me a note on th...

• the instant after you break something and you're in shock but i always wonder if i can go back and time and fix it
• when i walk into my bathroom and realize my curling iron has been plugged in all day
• when i drop my eye shadow on the floor and i crumbles into dust
• when i drink soda and my teeth feel "filmy"
• finding a spider in my house, especially in my room
• putting clothes away
• not having a successful shopping day
• finding dust on my ice skates because i don't use them
• not being able to play piano songs flawlessly anymore
• burning my self
• dropping my curling iron on the floor (i've broken too many doing this but they al...

at my old house

• spilling jager all over my wall during a game of beer pong
• breaking one of my glasses during said game of beer pong
  • i practically smashed it onto the table. then collapsed in a fit of laughter
• stealing my upstairs neighbor's fold up table from the garage behind our house for a game of beer pong
  • stealing said table multiple times, during night AND day

things that happened the night i got drunk off a bottle of champagne with ex bff

• developed a southern accent
• ordering fast food with sweet, fake, southern accent
• ex bff hated her blizzard so i attempted ...

• that cold feeling you get when you eat a mint and then drink water.
• taking out the trash. i hate it.
• wearing matching socks.
• sleeping in an unmade bed.
• that feeling you get in the middle of the night when you wake up and feel like you'll die if you don't get water instantly.
• when you're freezing and you get in hot water and it burns so bad.
• when you eat too much/many sour candies/food/etc and it burns your tongue off.
• when the insides of coats aren't polar fleece and you have to put on a freezing jacket when you're already freezing.
• when my feet are so cold they shrink like 5 sizes.
• when my alarm goes off and it's playing a song that i hate and then that song is stuck in my head all day.

• paper cranes
  • paper crane mobile
  • paper crane window hangy thing for my car
• pompom flowers
• cute little felt animals
• crocheted drink cozies (but not the trashy beer kind)
• felt leaf garlands
• felt flower garlands
• laptop case
• beaded bracelet
• Christmas decs
  • pom wreath
  • fabric trees
• canvas covered cork board
  • and cute deco push pins