- 08/08: i'm so messed up so messed up sososo messed up. se a minha sinceridade me assusta imagina oq as outras pessoas iam pensar. eu nao to bem. ngm ta bem. eu queria nao ter estragado tudo. o peso nos meus ombros eh demais e eu nao sei como set it aside. i hurt people. he is hurt and upset because of me. that is fucked up because i love him and i want him to be happy and be there for him but i fucking hurt him. what is wrong with me.... it is exhausting i cant forgive myself for being dumb and i cant let things go and i cant wrap my head around the fact that i'm losing someone who is really important to me
- 11/08: IT'S 4:36 IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT. i had a dream w u :( and i was so sure we could work everything out :( i was THIS CLOSE to sending you "eu acho q a gente deveria namorar" :( IT SUCKS!!! u were stalking me on twitter i guess and i posted the lyrics to a certain song and you posted the following lyrics. you even had messed up the commas as you always do. but i just felt it really hard inside my heart that we should Try. fuck im so sad please i need to stop dreaming about you
- 27/08: just need to get this out of my system. i'm gonna miss hugging you, even though i only did it for real once. i'm gonna miss you holding my hand and caressing it so softly i could die. i'm gonna miss laughing and looking at you and being like "what?" and you being like "what?" and then being like "nothing" and laughing again. i'm gonna miss being shoulder to shoulder, jokingly laying my head on you, you rubbing your hand on my arm for absolutely everything. i'm gonna miss this and it sucks. am i so emotionally needy right now? i don't feel like that is true. you are different. you were different. this has to stop. i'm sorry. i'm really sorry.
nov 7 2021 ∞
nov 7 2021 +