My tweets:

• "Listen david, we do not whistle while we work! We grumble, and complain, and convince others to do likewise."
• Stephen says he shaves his beard twice a day. He's 8.
• "damn i left the newborns next door!"
• I hate being the wife...
• "Hey Em, it's Jess." "Hey Jess, it's Em." best senior quote ever.
• "do you have steak?" "yes" "oh, then ill have the grilled cheese."
• Off to my fifth prom. Why does everyone act so surprised when i say that?
• DEAR JOHN, CHERYL SANG IN CHURCH TODAY. IT MADE ME CRY. SHE CRIED TOO. WE'RE PICKING UP MAGGIE AFTER CHURCH. ROAD TRIP!
• "well then i have an iron man date with the asian sensation."
• I want pie! I want beef jerky!
• See, well, I've had an abortion... Well a...

Friends:

• Greg- Hebrew Hammer, Hammer
• Patrick- Simple Jack, Jack
• Dwight- D-wight
• Christine- Xine
• Jordan- Jojo
• Charles- 100 buck Chuck
• Andrew- Bear
• Matt- Mouse
• Shannon- Honeybear
• Alexis- Lexlus
• Michael- Mikey Fresh
• Kenzi- Kenz
• Seth- Trollfoot
• Maggie- Homegirl, Karen
• Joe- You Asshole
• Emily- Emma Dye!, Ethel, Girl
• Kelsey- Kelskeet
• Brittany- Britty Titty
• Shelby- Kayla
• Victoria- Vicfic

I'd be Muggle-born I would be in Ravenclaw My Patronus would be a crow My wand would be 12¾" walnut, with a dragon heartstring core My favourite subjects would be Charms and defense against the dark arts, aperition, and flying class My boggart would be a frog My preferred Quidditch position would be Keeper I'd probably join the dueling club My ambition would to become a Curse breaker My amortentia would smell of a baking cake, the smell before a storm, and the smell of a crisp autumn day My animagus would be a raven My favorite spell would be incarcerous My favorite proffessor would be proffessor McGonagall My favorite place in the castle would be the room of requirement

A- Alice in Wonderland B- Big bro/ lil bro time C- Cheese steaks D- Dirty Dancing (And I don't mean the movie) E- Escargot F- France/ french cooking G- Getting up early for Christmas H- Home movies I- Invitations to parties J- Jumping into a pool on a really hot day K- Kissing L- Lightning storms M- Making collages and going through all of the pictures that I put in them N- Nerds O- Oprah parodies P- Panera bread Q- Questions on the old myspace surveys R- Roseanne S- Sarah Silverman T- Tau Kappa Epsilon U- Unexpected texts from people you haven't talked to in a while V- Visiting the lake W- Water X- Chi droppings Y- Yogurt- especially strawberry cheesecake Z- Zip Zap Zop

The best:

• Roseanne
• Seinfeld
• Family Guy
• Robot Chicken
• Drawn Together
• Dr. G: Medical Examiner
• Mystery Diagnosis
• It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
• The Sarah Silverman Program
• So You Think You Can Dance
• Spongebob
• The Fairly Odd Parents
• Cops
• It Only Hurts When I Laugh

The worst:

• Two and a Half Men
• Everybody Loves Raymond
• The George Lopez Show
• Jon and Kate + 8

Note: I did not alter any of the events that are listed

• Have sex three times in a row.
• Leave the baby outside in the grass and take the news paper inside.
• Make out with the boss while her husband was asleep.
• Clean the toilet instead of going to work.
• Give birth in the park while the husband is meeting the public.
• Catch the firehouse on fire.
• Eat rotten food that has been sitting in the refridgerator for maybe ten days.
• When the baby is left alone in her crib, and hungry, she proceeds eat her foot.
• The mother cheering once the baby has fallen asleep.
• Impregnating the neighbors.
• Inviting guests into the house at 10:00 at night then promptly falling asleep.

• Become an educatoin major
• Get a little brother
• Get a solo in the Camerata Singers
• Find a cool roommate, if not Seth
• Get Seth to rush TKE
• Get Kenzi to rush AΣT
• All A's and B's in my classes
• Become an ambassdor
• Visit Kristin
• Have Kelsey visit me
• Enter a writing contest
• Get a part in a play or musical

"Some guys just can't hold their arsenic." --The Cell Block Tango, Chicago "Are you scared of me? Immered in loves encounter, the heavens merge with Hell." --Lamentation, Lean Andreone "I'm dancing in a room as if I was in the woods with you. No need for anything about music, music's the reason why. I know time still exists, time still exists, time still exists, time still exists, so I just put my arms around you." -- Dancing, Elisa "Spend my dollar; parked in a holler 'neath the mountain moonlight. Holder her uptight, make a little lovin', a little turtle dovin' on a Mason Dixon night. Fits my life, oh so right, my dixieland delight"-- Dixieland Delight, Alabama "Why do you build me up buttercup baby just to let me down?" --Build me up Buttercup, The Foundations "There ain't no rest for the wicked, until we close our eyes for good." --Ain't no rest for the Wicked, Cage the Elephant "I lov...

Phone: Sir Rembington IV Ipod touch: Titanic (Whenever I update my ipod it says "Syncing Titanic")

Music:

• Mr. Sandman

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9xMCNmUaG...

• My Favorite Things

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OvYZMqQff...

• Impossible

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LEBUkHQjN...

• Can't Take My Eyes Off You

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WpYhWMXwJ...

• Cuban Pete

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iw4-GDGN7... Comedy:

• Whore Make-up Tutorial

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HJ4Fj4HAk...

• Dude Goes Ballistic With His Gun

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UpqL0fwPR...

Furnature and misc items:

• ✔ Many, many fans. I'm thinking 4ish
• ✔ Shower curtain
• ✔ Two new pillows
• A huge water bottle
• A mini refridgerator
• A comfy chair
• ✔ Hooks to hang pictures on
• ✔ A lock

Food:

• Ramen
• ✔ Easy mac
• Brunswick stew
• Chewy bars
• Crates of orange juice

Cleaning supplies:

• ✔ Pinesol
• ✔ A toilet wand
• ✔ Disinfectant spray

• Beauty and the Beast
• Wicked
• Forbidden Broadway
• Little Shop of Horrors
• Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat
• Fools
• A Christmas Carol
• The Music Man
• Chicago
• The Lion King
• The Drowsy Chaperone
• Happily Ever Once Upon
• My Favorite Year
• And Then There Were None
• Grease
• Bye Bye Birdy
• Footloose
• It Happens Every Summer
• Pocahontas
• High School Musical

• Facebook
• Twitter
• Myspace
• Livejournal
• Listography
• AIM
• Youtube
• Xanga
• EAgames
• Yahoo
• MSN
• Hulu
• Wikipedia

• If I were a season, I'd be Fall. • If I were a month, I'd be October. • If I were a day of the week, I’d be Friday. • If I were a time of day, I'd be 10:00pm. • If I were a planet, I'd be Saturn. • If I were a sea animal, I'd be a Electric Eel. • If I were a bird, I'd be a Raven. • If I were a direction, I’d be East. • If I were a piece of furniture, I’d be a Piano. • If I were a liquid, I’d be a Mercury. • If I were a gemstone, I’d be Emerald. • If I were a tree, I’d be a Weeping Willow. • If I were a tool, I’d be a Hedge clipper. • If I were a flower, I’d be a Forget-me-not. • If I were a kind of weather, I’d be Stormy with intense winds and lighting. • If I were a musical instrument, I’d be the Piano. • If I were a color, I’d be Blue. • If I were an emotion, I'd be Bitter. • If I were a fruit, I’d be a Pineapple. • If I w...