The world-ending pandemic is coming, sooner than you think

• The good news is you'll meet your soulmate while in quarantine!
• But s/he has a 66% chance of eating it before quarantine is lifted
  • even more if you confess your love before the epilogue
• Try to fall in with an anti-hero; their smart alec-ism provides natural immunity from disease and makes them strong leaders in the post-collapse society
• Don't get too attached to animals

^Margaret Atwood, Connie Willis, and Kelly Link