These stories are so much more hilarious in person. Wish you could hear all of them! :-)

My Third Grade Class:

• (4)This one little boy...had the funniest story ev. He stutters and he was telling me about his life, how he will grad HS, then college, get married to a pretty wife, have kids, and then travel. Oh wow. Also, it wasn't just like travel. Like he wants to go hunt cool animals and help the world? I was like in Africa. No...like America, but really cool animals and they will help people.
• We had a little incident in the bathroom, like you know...tearing open pads and tampons.
• (13)This other little boy, finally got my name, and I want to bring him home. He is so stinken' cute and always gives me high-fives!
• (8)This other little boy, seriously comes to my desk every 2 minutes and asks for help. I love him.
• So this little girl in after-school. We were playing Guess Who? Like...'Does your person have glasses?' So...I was like...'Ask if her person has a certain color hair...' She says...'Does your person have a certain color hair...' Bahaha. She did not understand that she needed to ask a specific color. Oh kinders.
• (6)During music, they were singing a song about MT. The teach goes...so why do you think he is from MT. This girls shouts out...he is WHITE. Ha. Racist much?
• (1)They were doing a word-search on Labor Day and the world 'sect' was in it. Like...you know related to Labor Day and this one kid...literally was shouting out...SEX SEX SEX...SEX IS IN THIS WORD-SEARCH...funniest ever.
• (4)The same boy that had his travel story about his wife...was telling me about his 'Student from Italy'. He went off on how she was going to be here for 8 years!?! Literally...I said...8 years? My teacher said...'You think 8 months?' Oh ya, maybe. Then he was like she drove A LONGGGG WAY...we were like you think she flew?
• (5+11)Out at recess today, I was walking by the swings and these 2 little girls in my class start telling me about how they are going to make cupcakes for money and then buy a ranch. That was cute, but then the one girl tells me about how this other little boy in our class got a cupcake maker for her birthday and she exclaimed, 'I THINK HE LIKES ME.' Ooooooooh...even in grade 3! :)
• (13)This penguin has a bad first name! 'Jackass Penguin'. Oh ya, sometimes they do that, just ignore it. :-)
• You're already good at doing EEEEEEEVERRRYTHING for being here like 2 weeks. (Ok...it was 4, but still). Kids.
• Daily Language every morning. The kids see my name in a sentence...saying I am getting married. THEY FREAKED out in the middle of their test, and started yelling, YOU ARE GETTING MARRIED. No. Thanks Mrs. G for putting me in.
• (1)Ok...so we were playing a noun game...2 kids are up for around the world, and I pull the card 'Proper Place' 'H'. This little boy yells. HOOTERS! Funniest moment ever. About died of laughter.
• (10)In music today they were singing, 'The Hearse Song'. It said something about dying and being eaten in the ground...typical Halloween song. This one kid said, 'YA, BUT WHO CARES IN 3 DAYS YOU ARE IN HEAVEN.' I about died. The music teacher said, well some people may believe that. How funny. 3 days?
• (1)During the pledge. Ok. So...first we have a 'blue box buddy,' whose job is to pass out these boxes every morning. So the kid is passing them out, in the middle we have to say the pledge so he sets them on this director's chair. In the middle of the pledge one falls down and he looks over and says, 'It didn't wanna hear the pledge for some odd reason.' That kid. Is one of my favs. Like all these stories are him.
• (2)Alright, so we told the kids outside to go inside and sit quietly at their desk and have everything cleared off, so we walk inside and I go...'A...I really like how you are getting ready!' Like two minutes later she turns around and goes...'Am I really following directions, or are you secretly telling me I'm not.' What a doll.
• (2)Later that day she comes up with this ZooBook and says...'I don't know if they're connected or if that's another frog on top.' I wanted to say...honey they're having sex. I held back. :)
• (2 + 4)So...this girl goes...should I take it with me...or...what should I...I know...and then this little boy...goes...'Take it with you...Goodbye.' Very smug and to the point. HILARIOUS. The way he said it. <3
• (16) I am really emotional, so if I start crying it's alright. <3 this girl. We were watching 'How to Train Your Dragon' when she came up to me red faced and said this!
• (2 + 9) What do you wanna be when you grow up? Logan.
  • What do you really wanna be? Oh, Miss F. Haaaa. <3
• (4) Telling the class about 13 colonies. They asked if people still lived like that. I started talking about the Omish...Well...they don't believe in...this kid shouts out...GOD...I was dying...I was like no...trying to explain the non-computers...type belief.
• (9) All of a sudden...he goes...'Just be quiet Kenisyn...' Oh my gosh. Did I almost die. AKA: SHUT THE HELL UP.
• (4 + 15) I very seriously and half pissed off said...'Did we rewind 9 years and you became T------?' The kid looked at me and T goes...'I WISH!' Hilarious. I couldn't even be mad at the other kid, because I was laughing so hard at T.
• (10) Me...I will give you some great reward...like a million dollars, but not, because I am poor. 'How do you have such beautiful clothes then!?!' She was cute. I just chuckled!

Basketball:

• Playing an AWAY game against the Home-schoolers...at this gym with tons of verses on the wall...one child on our team...goes...'These guys must be holy or something...' Totally serious. While pointing @ all the verses. Those moments make it all worth it!