'the last month of autumn, but the beginning of a new adventure; time to take risks and do the unexpected.'

"no" vember

• no self-hate
• no excuses
• no regrets
• no quitting

— NOVEMBER

• 30; the last day of november! what a wild ride / french toast for breakfast / folded laundry aka the worst chore, the bane of my existence / cried when i finished 'my fair neighbor' then read a bunch of unfinished mangas / talked about old delirium ph memories with jam and arrianne / reminder that i love lauren oliver

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• 29; morning convo with lisa / read bits of shoujo manga / a day dedicated to school requirements / new curtains arrived / found an picture of tommy as a puppy in my sister's old phone, i cried

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• 28; painted the afternoon away

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• 27; really good breakfast with the whole family / i felt really pretty wow / underestimated the amount of people at the park and went out wearing a dress, had to walk my dog real quick / drive thru at mcdonalds / went to bed at 8pm and read fanfics until i fell asleep

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• 26; wet and dark morning / my cousin is here to help out with stuff and he brought kesong puti / walked the dogs when it stopped raining, it was really cold outside / practiced drawing fruit and other random things / went to national bookstore to buy a canvas / made a quick stop at the young adult section to skim vendetta before leaving hehe / mom and i listened to disney songs on the drive to pick up my brother's girlfriend / anais slept over and let us pick from her old clothes, i took 3 dresses / went to bed at 9pm

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• 25; a complete blur to be honest i spent the entire day drawing / dark and gloomy weather

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• 24; thanksgiving day! i love jam and arrianne + our plethora of original characters / didn't have internet for most of the day / finished my first drawing using a tablet, the brush strokes are so satisfying / tita ellen's mom gave us pots of flowers from tagaytay / i miss nanny, i miss all of my adopted grandmothers / got spotify premium for 3 months, my playlists are going to be wild

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• 23; my drawing tablet is finally here!! / finally finished my 10th book of a series, i feel ugly / arroz valenciana for lunch and mango sago for dessert mmmm / spent hours installing the driver, it turns out my laptop is just really crappy / my grandma (father's side) came over / for now it works on my mom's laptop but omg it's glorious / my hand aches

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• 22; my bones ache ugh / had a hearty breakfast (bacon) / my mom is so excited about the drawing tablet / her belief in my art makes me weep / made myself lunch that i really enjoyed / was going through my emails and found a birthday greeting from my dream uni / started drafting my first blog post / mom made me promise to create a portfolio and submit them to art schools / tacos for dinner, i am so full / got a text that my drawing tablet has been dispatched

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• 21; printed school requirements / browsed pinterest for art project ideas / finally told my mom about the zine / she let me place an order for my first drawing tablet as an 18th birthday gift! / made a new tumblr that's going to be more personal / ate 2 doughnuts for dinner

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• 20; sunday became chore day / gave tommy a bath, he smells so good / did all my laundry / reads books and played around on photoshop / set up the fairy lights in tommy's space, his tail wagged the whole time which probably means that he likes it

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• 19; woke up late / frantically planned my birthday dinner date with nyna and angel / adelle had to saty in manila and couldn't come :( / my mom bought fairy lights for tommy!! / lazed around until the last minute / felt very cute in my outfit which was a long button-up denim dress and a white shirt underneath / browsed national bookstore with nyna and talked about books we've both read while waiting for angel / had pizza for dinner, ate gave me the rest of her free iced tea / walked around the mall and basically ate food just so we could stay in different places / apparently a boy who had a crush on angel was following us around?? / by the end of the night we all shared a slice of frozen brazo that angel and nyna bought for me / it was a cold night filled with warm conversation and laughter

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• 18; ahhhhh friday morning / started reading immediately after waking up / sang disney songs / fooled around on photoshop and actually made something / ate and i walked the dogs together / we came home to mom unwrapping our fave pancit

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• 17; tried not to psych myself about being officially and legally 18 years old / jeff buckley's birthday, he would have been 50 years old today / an idle day consisting mostly of reading and writing / caught up with sophie about life, school, and art

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• 16; it's my birthday! / the dreams i had last night were bad dreams, haunting dreams / started the day listening to disney songs as i did my chores / wore a simple dress today / read all afternoon / it's finally sunny enough to walk my dogs / my friends' birthday messages made me cry

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• 15; still a little weak but definitely feeling better than the last few days / a wet and rainy day / mom bought sansrival for me / the power went out as i was slicing my cake so i ate in the dark / when the power came back i "made a wish" and blew out the candles that were meant to be our light

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• 14; was really exhausted when i woke up this morning / felt like collapsing after walking my dog / listened to music as i tinkered on my laptop / tried to do school work but ended making myself dizzy / mama let me nap in their airconditioned room / angel came to see me while i was walking my dog! caught up with each other about school and life in general

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• 13; talked about political history and theories around breakfast / the girl at the registrar literally gasped and said "i'm lois. you're lois. we're the same person." / i was the 81st person in line / donated blood for the first time! it was worth the wait / ate reached her goal of 3 blood donors / they fed us afterwards with really good lugaw, a cupcake, and iced tea / had thai food for lunch / i feel like i could sleep for days

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• 12; first time talking to chesca, she is so nice and funny! we gushed about the zine and working together / kuya and anaïs visited / studied and talked with ate all afternoon / my mom coddling me into eating healthy food to prepare for tomorrow's blood letting / my dogs made me laugh so hard / great dinner conversation with the fam / drank fresh coconut juice
• 11; woke up earlier than usual / had a good walk with my dogs / loved feeling the sun on my face despite the cool morning / leonard cohen passed away. i will remember him for his art / finished a book / mom bought korean food
• 10; still emotionally exhausted from current events / finished upgrading my laptop's system / ate said i could come to her uni on sunday to donate blood / talked with mom and ate about revelations / my eyed are tired / started a new book that might get me out of my reading slump

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• 9; kosher's 1st birthday! / organized grades and requirements for school / had pasta and eggplant for lunch which i ate out of the cooking pot itself to save time/ in the process of manually upgrading the entirety of my laptop's system / the suspense and devastating results of the u.s. elections drained me / my mother has told me countless times before that america was not destined for greatness; i did not expect for it to be this terrifying.

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• 8; day started out nice and steady / found out my laptop doesn't meet the system requirements to play dragon age: inquisition / one of the schools i wanted to get into doesn't accept students with incomplete vaccination or none at all / emotionally and physically exhausting kind of day

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• 7; didn't get enough sleep but i'm a morning person no matter how shitty my days can get / had an axiety attack thinking about all the requirements i've yet to meet to transfer to my desired school next year / joined a zine / miguel posted his first blog and it's so funnyyyyy. also v proud of him

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• 6; woke up to tommy howling, or rather, mooing like a cow / it rained during the afternoon / spent hours on pinterest / organized the files on my laptop to have more disk space / pondered over old graphics i made and really loved / someone asked me to join their zine / not as eventful but overall a good day

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• 5; remember, remember, the 5th of november / organized my pinterest boards / failed to make things on photoshop / had a sad moment /dad brought home japanese candy / reread scenes from shuffle, repeat with arrianne

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• 4; walked in the rain so my dog could poop / morning coffee was room temperature when i got back / talked about books with ate / listened to music / gathered edit ideas to (hopefully) make on photoshop / my kuya's girlfriend, anais, offered to give us clothes that she doesn't wear anymore, i love her style so ate and i said we'd check it out before anais donates them

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• 3; cold weather / my dogs seem to love the smell of my cardigan / got my period / started reading blood for blood by ryan graudin / mom and ate brought home banana-que / ate confirming that i might be able to donate blood on the 13th!!

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• 2; woke up with a good night's sleep / took care of my skin with my diy egg white peel off mask / made macaroni with sun-dried tomato pesto sauce for myself / my mom and ate brought home french fries / rewatched the umbrella scene in miraculous ladybug / got up from bed at 10.40pm to catch my loose dog and tie him back at his post / sinned in a group chat with jam and ari

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• 1; also known as the day of the scorpio races / went bike riding around the neighborhood again after such a long time. it's been over a year / made playlists on spotify