• replace this text with your list
  • begin each item with an asterisk
sep 28 2015 ∞
sep 28 2015 +
  • wide sea sargasso/jane eyre
  • the madwoman in the attic
apr 21 2015 ∞
apr 21 2015 +
  • being reminded of my deficiencies
  • remembering things that will never occur again
  • looking forward to something that does not happen
  • unresolved conflicts
  • shitty music
  • feeling left behind or forgotten
jan 22 2012 ∞
apr 21 2015 +
  • read more
  • get back into painting
  • watch a movie like every night
  • bake more
  • learn to cook a lot of types of foods
  • take care of my skin both face and body
  • not eat as much crappy foods
  • become better at finding presents for Avi
  • look for newer music to listen to
  • not focus on the bad things about people all the time
  • go to give kids the world
  • get back into needle working
  • spend a lot of time with friends
  • go to more parties
  • smoke more pot
  • drink more
mar 21 2013 ∞
apr 21 2015 +
  • study for finals
  • finish packing
  • adesh (sublease)
    • call grandmarc
  • internship details
  • clean room
apr 21 2015 ∞
apr 21 2015 +
  • clothing
    • underwear
    • bras
    • t shirts
    • leggings/pants
    • dresses
    • sweaters
    • tank tops
    • 3/4 sleeves
  • nail polishes
    • nail tools
      • nail file
      • nail buffer
      • nail clipper
      • cuticle cream
      • cuticle stick
      • toe separators
    • nail polishes
jul 11 2014 ∞
aug 25 2014 +
  • went to the beach @ night
  • bought some new jeans
  • spent time with my my mom, sister and my mom's boyfriend trever
  • received a booty call
  • operation booty call postponed
  • booty call replaced with an actual dinner date, followed by some nibbling
  • went christmas shopping for family
  • did not buy anything for family
  • went to friends house to bake red and green brownies for family
  • did not finish until 3AM
  • get bitched at
  • met brothers new girlfriend
  • spent christmas with familia
  • got some sweet pj pants, leather watch, candy, lotions and other shit
  • baked some french macarons
  • chilled with my sister
  • watched suspiria, the illusionist, the pr...
dec 27 2011 ∞
apr 21 2015 +
list icon
  • the history of tom jones; a foundling by henry fielding
  • heaven & hell by aldous huxley
  • a clockwork orange by anthony burgess
  • persuasion by jane austen
  • atonement by ian mcewan
  • the tenant by roland topor
  • the blue flowers by raymond queneau
  • tonguecat by peter verhelst
  • the woman with the dog by Anton Chekhov
  • clarissa by samuel Richardson
  • franny and zooey by j.d. salinger
  • The marriage plot by Jeffrey eugenides
jan 17 2012 ∞
dec 9 2012 +
  • franz liszt
    • liebestraum
    • reve d'amour
  • sid vicious
    • my way
    • something else
  • bach
    • bouree in e minor
    • solfeggietto
  • weep no more sad fountains
  • ludwig van
  • cults
  • dead kennedys
  • camera obscura
    • french navy
  • andrew jackson jihad
  • mozart
dec 28 2011 ∞
dec 9 2012 +

oaky so for my high school yearbook, alex johnson wrote to me:

'hope you find something you love to do".

those words always kill me. not really because its from alex but more because i dont think i will ever find what i love to do.

mar 6 2013 ∞
apr 14 2015 +
  • eyebrow pencil
  • bb/cc cream
  • blush
  • brushes
  • chanel liquid foundation
  • stile black liquid eyeliner
  • tonymoly double needs pang pang mascara
oct 21 2015 ∞
jul 23 2016 +
  • skin care
    • clinique exfoliating scrub
  • make up
  • clothing
apr 25 2015 ∞
apr 25 2015 +

-Next year is my last year of college. I can already feel my stress levels rising. I do not think I will be doing grad school. The idea of another year of school makes me sick. I feel sick right now just thinking about it. Lets give this a shot. Lets see how well I can work in the finance world and maybe then I will be able to decide if grad school is something I would like to do.

In the upcoming two weeks, I have so much shit to do I could cry:

-shakepeare final paper -critical issues final paper -business calc test 3 -aed quizzes -macro quiz

along with 4 finals...

apr 14 2015 ∞
apr 21 2015 +

I feel like I'm always going through slumps and at the last minute I get to enjoy everything but much too late. Sure college is a nice fun thing but I mean I'm missing so much. Yeah I could make a ton of new friends but I'm afraid my grades would suffer and would my relationship with Avi. I would not care to do either of those things. It's funny how I usually end up hanging out with my friends friends and never have any real ones of my own. Who knows what this is all about. I still miss high school and I wonder how long this will last compared to how long I missed middle school. These slumps that I seem to go through not only hold me back but they also remind me that it's impossible to enjoy anything when you miss something (or someone too I guess). There's always that thing in the back of your head reminding you things could be better. Or are they already? Am I just living in the past bec...

mar 20 2013 ∞
apr 21 2015 +

Really need to start seeing myself in a better light. I tend to ruin myself over stupid shit that I know I shouldn't. For whatever reason I feel the way I feel, I also feel like I could just stop when I want. But I don't. Obviously I control my own actions but I can't help how I feel. Sometimes it really hurts but then I realize its been awhile. Its nothing I can't change, its nothing that won't change. However I don't want it to be something that I get used to. I don't want to be that way.

apr 21 2015 ∞
apr 21 2015 +
  • when you feel attraction to someone else, it's probably a good idea to break up
  • never shave your vagina for a boy, he won't call you and you'll have to wait a week before you feel comfortable enough to shave again
  • he might seem ugly but his intentions are even uglier: looks have nothing to do with personality. An ugly person can hurt you just as much as a beautiful one
  • dont hook up with friends of friends: they will steal your friends and you'll be home alone wondering if they're making fun of the way you give blow jobs
  • do not text him: OMG just don't
  • sex is sex and if you feel attraction you probably aren't ready
dec 21 2014 ∞
apr 14 2015 +
  • lush
    • fresh farmacy
    • herbalism
    • coal face
    • snowcake
    • northern lights soap
    • various others..
  • anywhere...
    • more PANTS
    • boots
    • shoes
    • bras
  • books
    • atonement
    • geisha girls
    • serial killer
  • movies
jan 3 2012 ∞
dec 9 2012 +
  • risky business
  • riding in cars with boys
  • sense and sensibility
  • american psycho
  • bridget jones' diary
oct 6 2012 ∞
oct 6 2012 +
  • fresh cosmetics
    • soy face cleanser
    • umbrian clay moisturizer
  • josie maran argan oil light
  • clinique exfoliating scrub
  • nars blush
  • bras & underwear
aug 17 2014 ∞
aug 17 2014 +
  • replace this text with your list
  • begin each item with an asterisk
apr 21 2015 ∞
apr 21 2015 +

First and foremost, I am the biggest idiot in the world at the moment. I have absolutely no regard for myself to be making the dumb mistakes and decisions that I have been making. Next, I need to be a lot stronger. I know I can do it because I've spent so long doing it. I cannot and I will not give up now.

I love Avi. I know I do. We were in a little bit of a rut before and I feel like had none of that happened, I would not be in the shitty situation that I am in right now. I will say that this whole rut has made it very hard for me to deal with my own personal problems properly.

Now this whole Sam business. I definitely do not like him like that. Yes I find him attractive but that is really it. I don't like him. This odd feeling that I get is really just something that I am lacking internally and has nothing to do with him. But he thinks otherwise. I need to se...

oct 20 2014 ∞
oct 20 2014 +

So I've been back only a couple of days but so far things have been amazing. Unfortunately though I have made a complete fool of myself in front of Chris because I told him about my small crush on a certain someone. I look like an idiot because I am not in any position to have any crushes. I mean it's nothing really. I just need to be exposed more often in order to not feel like a little school girl about this anymore. After I've gotten drunk a couple of times or even just soberly hangout with him I think I will be okay. I do think Chris thinks I am a complete mess now though which I will only have to counter by showing and proving to him that I am not a complete mess. There's nothing I hate more than having to wait a whole week or at least almost a whole week before actually seeing and being with people that I need to show that I am not a crazy bitch. Or maybe I am? But even if I am I sho...

aug 25 2014 ∞
apr 14 2015 +

You're overthinking things way too much. Don't be stupid.

nov 1 2014 ∞
apr 21 2015 +
  • nike free 5.0 $100
  • macbook air or pro $999-$1,200
  • school supplies
    • agenda
    • pens
      • G2 Pilot
  • winter clothing
    • socks
    • sweaters
    • pants/leggings
  • 60's ankle boots
  • toiletries
    • make up
      • eyebrow gel
      • bb cream $32-44
jun 24 2014 ∞
oct 20 2014 +
  • The off season
  • Dolls
  • The shining
  • The exorcist
  • The others
  • Poltergeist
  • The skin I live in
  • Freaks
  • Beyond belief
  • Twilight zone
  • Texas chainsaw massacre
  • House on haunted Hill
  • Thirteen ghosts
  • Amityville horror
  • The haunting
  • We need to talk about Kevin
  • Vanilla sky
  • Old boy
  • Rubber
  • Cabin in the woods-
  • Inland empire
dec 9 2012 ∞
aug 17 2014 +
list icon
  • the count of monte cristo
  • goodfellas
  • blow
  • 500 days of summer
  • sid and nancy
  • begotten
  • the phantom of the opera
  • heathers
  • dazed and confused
  • three o clock high
  • heavenly creatures
  • deliverance
  • eraserhead
  • atonement
  • high fidelity
  • mask
  • becoming jane
  • mansfield park
  • northanger abbey
  • jane eyre
  • sweet charity
jan 3 2012 ∞
mar 20 2013 +