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what is a home if not the first place you learn to run from?
your desire & your fear of desire annihilate each other
desire chokes me like i wish your hand did
i think i've lost myself somewhere along the way
i'm not a good person, ask anyone who loves me
i couldn't be the kind of person who stays
forgetfulness, an absence, a mere nothing
laughing with a mouth of blood from a little spill i took
i've been the shadow of your shadow
clarice lispector on the unknowable heaviness of existing
i feel numbered, and constricted all over. i barely fit inside myself
i'm the wound and i'm the knife
this was always going to happen
the first time i kissed him properly he flinched
jan 2 2023 +