should I kill myself, or have a cup of coffee?

†⠀ LÉO ㅤ·ㅤ loup ; eliott

• eighteen ('06). québec, canada. communist.
• pre-uni human sciences student ₁ wannabe philosophy teacher...
• coldly intellectual, compassionate critic, unapologetic daydreamer, trinket hoarder, organized maximalist, horror enthusiast, grammar nazi, asocial autist, eternally unsatisfied

♱ architecture, astronomy, cinema, collections and archives, criminology, debate and rhetoric, fashion, fitness and health, graphic design, history, hockey, horror, language learning, law (history), lists, literature, music, old web, philosophy, politics, psychology & psychoanalysis, puzzles, research, technology, translation, trinkets & antiques, video games, visual arts ——————————————————————————————————

I. II.

I respect my silences because of this; I respect my own inactivity and disappearances, remembering that not everything in a shell is hiding. It was never fear that made me want to do better, anyway. It was always grace. It was always the realization that I’m free to be anything, so why not choose something generative?

——————————————————————————————————

traits ———

• ▲ ambitious. analytical. calm. charismatic. curious. determined. efficient. enduring. focused. honest. intelligent. knowledgeable. loyal. orderly. perceptive. persuasive. polite. practical. prudent. rational. reasonable. reliable. resourceful. stoic. wise.
• ▼ aloof. apathetic. argumentative. arrogant. bossy. competitive. compulsive. condescending. cynical. dismissive. distrustful. envious. greedy. stubborn. selfish. sarcastic. unforgiving. uncaring. nit-picky. manipulative. judgmental. risk-avoidant. mellow.

associations ———

• leather, wood, brick, silver, gold, fur, paper, textile, tweed
• boats, sea(shore), water & waves, ropes, anchors
• keys, lockets, clocks, watches
• glass, wires, tech, patterns & symmetry, code, industrial
• chains, spikes, bones, smoke, ash, masks, gloves, knives, guns
• law, criminology, philosophy, communism
• detective, soldier, judge, knight, cowboy, soldier, teacher
• cats & felines, puffins, sharks
• archives, lists, notes & organization

reputation ———

• blunt and asocial but witty autist
• carefully curated online presences
• authoritarian left
• control freak
• music nerd

——————————————————————————————————

The great revelation perhaps never did come. Instead there were little daily miracles, illuminations, matches struck unexpectedly in the dark.