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- Being 'chased' through Bristol after bending an expensive piece of space machinery in order to make the 'Uranus' indicator point at my arse.
- Rolling around on a bed believing that 'Wonderful Christmas Time' is the most perfectly structured song to have ever been written.
- Watching a frail old man belt out the best rendition of Roy Orbison's 'I Drove All Night' in an expensive karaoke bar.
- Hiding behind a cupboard holding the gaze of my best mate as we awkwardly listened to someone get a blowjob.
- Watching through the peep hole on my door while someone joyously but viciously smashed a football continuously against it..
- Staying up all night with baseball bats and planks of wood to kill potential burglars.
- Driving around an empty field in a golf buggy before seeing the girl I fancied in the headlights sucking someone off.
- Seeing a 30 year old clown do the splits in the middle of a nightclub.
- Standing in the snow naked for absolutely no reason whatsoever.
- Walking down a road in a long purple charity shop dress with two people handcuffed around my neck.
- Hiding under a pile of damp clothes in a dark costume cupboard while my friend was bleeding next to me in a pile of broken glass.
- Standing outside the headmistress' office after being accused of sexually assaulting my Design and Technology teacher.
- Continuously beating a dog in the face with a toy shotgun.
- Watching silently in a large circle as two people viciously wrestled each other in a pile of gravel.
- Standing in a kitchen with three other people, in our boxers, touching ourselves.
- Being chased around a field by Macbeth's witches and 8 foot snails at 2:00 in the morning.
- Lying on the floor of a club after tripping over some railings.
- Watching awkwardly as an 18 stone American Football player did the dance from 'Pulp Fiction' in my living room.
- Helping Jesus down from a wall he'd got stuck on top of.
- Being told off as I stood in a hallway half naked dragging a bed.
jan 14 2011 ∞
jan 14 2011 +
jan 14 2011 +