temperance ask you to let go of your ego. but what is it? i used to think having an ego was to be egoistical, to think only about your self-esteem or pride; right now i think it's just the part of us we like to share to people — that could be being "good" or "bad" or something in between. my ego likes to be seen as someone easy-going, who never complains or says no.

that did an almost irreparable damage to my mental health and to my relationships in general. never saying no means feeling bad about things because you feel like you have no choice to say something, to push foward without rest, to resent people because of it. and sometimes they would force you anyway, but you said yes first. and now you feel guilty.

i'm trying to get better at it. to put up bondaries, to stop forcing myself to be such a "nice" person. i am more than that.