• "So, what is moral fiber? I mean, it's funny. I used to think it was always telling the truth, doing good deeds... you know, basically being a fucking Boy Scout. But lately I've been seeing it differently. Now I think that moral fiber is about finding that one thing you really care about. That one special thing that means more to you than anything else in the world. And when you find her, you fight for her. You risk it all. You put her in front of everything... your future, your life... all of it. And maybe the stuff you do to help her isn't so clean. You know what? It doesn't matter. Because in your heart, you know... that the juice is worth the squeeze. That's what moral fiber's all about." -The Girl Next Door
• "I don’t live in that world. What? You don’t live in what? The world of boyfriends? Of first dates? Of

holding hands? No. You, jackass. Of disposable girlfriends. Of blowjobs for bracelets. Of macking and hooking up and going down and text-messaging some asshole who will cum all over my shirt. That world." -Normal Adolescent Behavior

• "Look at me. I'm fat, black, can't dance, and I have two gay fathers. People have been messing with me my whole life. I learned a long time ago there's no sense getting all riled up every time a bunch of idiots give you a hard time. In the end, the universe tends to unfold as it should. Plus I have a really large penis. That keeps me happy." -Harold and Kumar Go To White Castle
• "You guys smoke ENTIRELY too much reefer." -Half Baked
• "Get some...sour cream and onion chips, with some dip, man. Some beef jerkey, some peanut butter. Get some Hagen-Dagz ice-cream bars. A whole lotta of chocolate. Gotta have chocolate, man. Some popcorn, pink popcorn. GRAHAM CRACKERS!!! Graham crackers with the marshmallows. Little marshmallows with little chocolate bars and we'll make some s'mores man. Celery, grape jelly, Captain Crunch with the little crunch berries, pizzas, we need two big pizzas, man, everything on 'em, water, a whole lotta water and... Funyuns." -Half Baked
• "I'm a dude. He's a dude. She's a dude. We're all dudes, hey!" -Good Burger
• "So... you want some of my electricity, do you? Well, for once the rich white man is in control!" -The Simpson's Movie
• "Can you exchange one life for another? A caterpillar turns into a butterfly. If a mindless insect can do it, why couldn't I? Was it any more unimaginable than the sinking of the Titanic?" -Titanic
• "Eat me, Sebastian. It's okay for guys like you and Court to fuck everyone but when I do it, I get dumped for innocent little twits like Cecile. God forbid I exude confidence and enjoy sex. Do you think I relish the fact that I have to act like Mary Sunshine 24/7 so I can be considered a lady? I'm the Marcia fucking Brady of the Upper East Side, and sometimes I want to kill myself. So there's your psychoanalysis, Dr. Freud. Now tell me are you in, or are you out?" -Cruel Intentions
• "As far as boyfriends go, Paulie Bleeker is totally boss. He is the cheese to my macaroni." -Juno
• "The funny thing is that Steve Rendazo secretly wants me. Jocks like him always want freaky girls. Girls with horn-rimmed glasses and vegan footwear and Goth makeup. Girls who play the cello and wear Converse All-Stars and want to be children’s librarians when they grow up. Oh yeah, jocks totally eat that shit up. They just won’t admit it because they’re supposed to be into perfect cheerleaders like Leah, who, incidentally, is into teachers." -Juno