Bold line is the lyrics misheard. The next line is real lyrics. Indented line is credit to artist and song title.

• "Wrapped up like a douche / a roller in the night"
• "Revved up like a deuce / another runner in the night"
  • Manfred Mann ~ Blinded By The Light
• "I need a Kleenex"
• "My little phoenix"
  • Tarja Turunen ~ My Little Phoenix
• "Burning down the shoes at ever dome"
• "Burning out his fuse up here alone"
  • Elton John ~ Rocket Man
• "If I could just teach my dog how to feel"
• "If they could just teach my dark heart to feel"
  • The Offspring ~ Lightning Rod
• "I'll be your crying soldier"
• "I'll be your cryin' shoulder"
  • Edwin McCain ~ I'll Be
• "I'll be captain lady"
• "I'll be captivated"
  • Edwin McCain ~ I'll Be
• "Heaven's a-chasing down that greasy slide"
• "Hell bent on chasing down that crazy spark"
  • Gloriana ~ Wild At Heart
• "I wanna love you, the bear said, the bear said I can't"
• "I wanna love you the best that, the best that I can"
  • Hootie & The Blowfish ~ Hold My Hand
• "Side by side we're raven song"
• "Side by side we're brave and strong"
  • Van Canto ~ One to Ten
• "When will you realize the NRA for you?"
• "When will you realize Vienna waits for you?"
  • Billy Joel ~ Vienna
• "Now you all know the bartender's song"
• "Now you all know the bards and their songs"
  • Van Canto ~ The Bard's Song - In the Forest
• "Fire armadillo"
• "Cryin' on his pillow"
  • Patsy Cline ~ Walking After Midnight