SATURDAY, 26th of April, 2014.

• ✓ I'll collect you from Buchanan Bus station, where I'll be standing underneath the sign at stance 55, near the vending machine.
• ✓ We'll have tea at Two Fat Ladies, and then have a coffee in George Square.
• ✓ Afterwards, we'll get the train back to my neck of the woods & stock up on booze from the off-licence.
• ✓ We'll watch Britain's Got Talent whilst getting ourselves dolled up for a night on the tiles.
• ✓ Once we're dressed to the nines, we'll catch a taxi to The Arches, where we'll be able to slip in unnoticed if Seanan, a pal of the bf, is working the entrance. If not, we'll proceed to King Tuts or, if all fails, the comedy club.
• ✓ After a night of getting white girl wasted (i̶n̶ ̶r̶e̶a̶l̶i̶t̶y̶ ̶w̶e̶'̶l̶l̶ ̶p̶r̶o̶b̶a̶b̶l̶y̶ ̶b̶e̶ ̶s̶l̶i̶g̶h̶t̶l̶y̶ ̶t̶i̶p̶s̶y̶,̶ ̶l̶o̶l̶ ̶), we'll catch a taxi back home.

SUNDAY, 27th of April, 2014.

• ✓ Following the rat-arsed escapades of last night, we'll sober up with a big vegetarian breakfast in a greasy spoon.
• ✓ Afterwards we'll take a taxi into George Square, where we'll take the open-top city sightseeing tour. We'll stop off at the People's Palace and the Kelvingrove Museum.
• ✓ Once back in George Square, we can either eat at The Piper (really nice bar, very Scottish!) or get a savoury bridie from Greggs and eat it in the square.
• ✓ We'll then nip into the pub for a quick pint or 4.
• ✓ Once fed and watered, we're free to hit Buchanan and Sauchiehall Street, where we can pursue the shops. After we've browsed the galleries and bought some perfume, we'll stop off for a coffee & cake at the Willow Tea Room.
• ✓ We'll then get the bus back to my my house, where I'll cook anything for dinner - it's completely your choice. I'm pretty competent in the kitchen, especially when it comes to curry and soups, so rest assured, you'll be fed well :)
• ✓ After eating tea, we'll break open a bottle of wine, glug it over a few episodes of 8 Out of Ten Cats, and then I'll walk you to the bus station, which isn't very far away.
• ✓ You'll get the coach back to Lincolnshire.