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  • i was born in south dakota. i have very few memories of living there (we moved when i was super young), but my strongest one is saying goodbye to my first best friend. her parting gift was a curly-haired doll i still have.
  • south dakota shaped the things i've been drawn to all my life: mountains, cold weather, wilderness, indigenous history & culture.
  • i loved being read to; my mom was my first (and greatest) teacher.
  • i was extremely tomboyish. i grew up with two older brothers and tried to do everything they did. i even beat up their best friend once... he laughed the entire time.
  • there were many tv shows i watched religiously with my brothers... we especially loved the power rangers & ninja turtles and often pretended to be them.
  • i often imagined inanimate objects to have feelings. i went through a particularly serious phase when i was 6 where i'd apologize to everything i ever bumped into or touched too harshly, especially plants. i had this bizarre phobia that the plants would get angry and turn me into a green zombie.
  • at age 7, i tripped outside my house after a dinner party and cut my forehead open. over a dozen stitches later, i was left with a scar and an important lesson: always strap your sandals before running out the door.
  • i was a hardcore insomniac from a very young age. i'd lie awake near my nightlight and read or ponder for hours on end.
  • my biggest fear in life was losing my loved ones. ever since i found out about death and saw the way people reacted to it, i prayed that i would die before all other family members and loved ones so i'd never have to see anyone suffer that much sadness. until my grandmother died when i was 10, this was the only thing i ever asked of God.
  • i was an extremely picky eater and hence *always* underweight.
  • i hated being yelled at. it terrified me.
  • i loved to draw and make art. my first dream in life was to become an artist.
  • i told stories all the time, and began writing them down when i was 6 or 7. from then on, it became my dream to be an author. i discovered my next great love- poetry- when i was 8, and became passionate about politics and activism at 9. i always wanted to make the world 'better' someday.
  • i was constantly sick or getting hurt. i ran into things a lot. i was always running, period, because it was the next best thing to flying.
  • i always wished i had a cat; i thought they were the most incredible creatures.
  • i got my first cat, binky, a few weeks before my 12th birthday. he was a surprise gift from my mom's best friend, esmerelda.
  • i had gruesome, horribly graphic nightmares all the time because i loved scary books & movies.
  • i was a lot more emotionally resilient than i am now. i always tried to give off the impression that i was fearless... i kept my feelings entirely to myself until i was about 10. the sappy heart-on-sleeve wearing came later.
  • i got really uncomfortable when boys bothered me, so i often responded by being unduly mean to them. in second grade, i made a boy cry by calling him an idiot for chasing me during recess... i got in huge trouble for that one.
  • i was so shy, i often had trouble approaching my own friends. sometimes, my mom had to ask them to come take me away.
  • i rarely ever spoke unless it felt necessary, and i was never loud enough, to the great annoyance of my teachers.
  • i spent hours at a time alone in my room, playing games and having tea parties with my stuffed animals. i once introduced a religious speaker to my teddy bears... years later, he kindly remembered to ask how they were doing.
  • i played outside almost every single day... my neighbor and i used to play 'mission impossible' on her swingset, it was one of our favorite games.
  • i was extremely gullible. i believed everything my brothers and friends told me, no matter how far-fetched, because i didn't think they would lie.
  • i loved to learn about absolutely everything. in elementary school, i'd hang out in the library's reference section and teach myself random things. one day, i memorized the preamble to the constitution; another day, the sign language alphabet. i was constantly overwhelmed by how much there was to discover.
  • during school, i spent every waking moment of my free time at the library; i felt more at home there than any other place.
  • i didn't register the fact that i had a physical appearance until i was about 12. 'beauty' was just a distant, unfamiliar concept before that.
  • my mom dressed me in frilly, girly frocks and always put clips and bows in my hair. when i got home from playing, the dresses were usually muddied and my hair a complete mess.
  • i pretended to have an imaginary friend just to amuse my brothers. i always wondered if they thought i was serious.
  • i had a blanket named 'baboo' who went with me everywhere. i could never fall sleep if he wasn't right there next to me, he was my shield from everything i found frightening in life.

x r

jun 29 2010 ∞
jul 30 2018 +