[deep in your wounds are seeds, waiting to grow beautiful flowers. - niti majethia]

• apr 01. mika got me mochis!!!! cutie. | i love it when people remember me and know me, have a concept of who I am... it's insane to me!!! | identified plants today! it was really fun and I can see myself in the future, doing this shit | finished tgp and I just want eleanor to be happy :")
• apr 02. okay. this morning we went on this field trip inside the park and it was so fun??? I'm not used to it but I know I can get used to it!!! that's what makes it so exciting!!! honestly HAPPY I get to do these things. I'm really thankful :") | I love my classmates but you know that already... it's so much love I feel like my heart might explode at any given second now | had great food!!! when I came home I decided to just take a shower, WASH MY HAIR, do my nails and watch dumb shit.
• apr 03. cleaning the lab wasn't as bad as I thought it'd be hehehe. | thankful for my friends!!! happy i'm privileged enough to live this wonderful and not perfect at all life | watched the twilight zone reboot with ana! and it was so fun, I'm too scared of everything but this one was FUN! | today I am... grateful for my friends.
• apr 04. plant anatomy cuts!!!! & they're so pretty, with their chloroplasts just walking around!!! their stocks of substances!!!! they're just the cutest beings ever. | listening to the radio is kinda fun? i love it. | hard to understand this but: people around me enjoy being around me. I'm good enough and there is nothing wrong with my personality, or even my appearance. I'm pretty enough because I love being myself. I'm nice enough because I live to be kind.
• apr 05. it's nice to hear I'm pretty, I'm smart and mature. idk I'm just lost some days but sometimes I am all these things!!!! | i love radio music.. & my playlist's music... | i honestly love being in my lab???? it's so nice I already feel like I'm at home.
• apr 06. took pics of tons of flowers on the street this morning!!! | it's chilly and it's cozy and I'm glad autumn is coming :") | I felt happy today. nothing really happened, I'm just glad to be alive and here.
• apr 07. i love the fact that my existence has an impact on other people's existence. it's insane to me to think that maybe i influence the people around me. | i've been thinking about being loved. it's nice to think about it sometimes. | the twilight zone reboot is flawless??? | it was really chilly today. made me some ramen and got cozy! reminds me of the good times...
• apr 08. I'm really proud of my sister for trying :") | I actually love my friends very much thank you for your time!!! | felt cute today!!! the cutest girl in the world told me I have very cute style ahhhhhhhh :( | oh it's LOVING PLANTS WITH MY ENTIRE HEART kinda mood today and I LOVE IT
• apr 09. i was rly tired after I showered when I got home, then I told mom that and then she helped me get dressed :( | being around ppl I love is wonderful, but being myself is good too??!!?!? it's actually important to be by myself sometimes. | i love my pretty lauraceae!!!! they are gorgeous and they have medicinal composts?!?! i fucking LOVE them oh my god. | listening to kings of leon, like I used to when lab mtv was still a thing... yeah.
• apr 10. my body is a temple and I will treat her like such. | today I'm thankful for wonderful opportunities!!! everything happened in a flash, I never thought it would happen so fast and so beautifully :")
• apr 11. to exist is such a beautiful thing. i was wondering, why me? and am I here and not some other girl? or boy? or neither? to exist is to live a miracle!!! I'm happy and very thankful I get to live such a gift. | my embryology prof is the CUTEST and I'm proud of myself because of her!!! was at her lecture at the museum and she kept coming back to me for answers to her not so rhetorical questions!!! felt important. | had lunch with literally everyone today lol and today's Lara's birthday!!! she's an angel. | listened to good music and had a good time at uni today. my frens... they are everything??!?! to me?!?! every time I laugh another love point is made. I'm gonna end up exploding!!! from so much love!!! | it feels SO nice to feel like I belong. i was never a girl to belong, you know? i was always the loner, the quiet and the emo kid. idk, I'm glad that's changed. i need company and I need human interactions!!! even though I don't know how to deal with them I still NEED them.
• apr 12. today was another AWESOME day. it keeps getting better and I'm gonna end up crying from so much happiness.... . | i LOVE plants. they are everything to me!!!!! i hope they know somehow. | carine just makes life so much brighter!!! and I'm glad I can give that kind of energy right BACK!!! ale told her i'm very organized, very methodic and nice :( CUTE. | ana is just out of this world!!! she's so important to me oh my god. was missing her this morning so I listened to trench over and over,,, 21p means ana. | today carine did the plant in your ear thingy that grandma used to do to me and I pictured the whole scene. it was such a raw memory it felt like it was real. i told her and she told me maybe my grandma was there with us, letting me know something... it was really sweet.
• apr 13. today was FUN! but calming fun. | watched spider verse and it's the prettiest animation I've ever seen???? | rewatched safety not guaranteed tonight! i love this movie so much. | felt sweet today! also took care of my plants! and had a bunch of jabuticabas I'm gonna die lol.
• apr 14. felt complete during this morning's mass. i love you so much jesus :( | started listening to american gospel!!! makes me feel better and bigger and stronger :") | put my plants in the sun this morning ! my daughters are just thriving in the sun these days. the loves of my entire life!!!! | watched the perfect date netflix movie!!! and I'm literally in LOVE with laura. she's so pretty I might start crying anytime soon??!?!? | I'm HAPPY today. just satisfied with my life.
• apr 15. living for good music and good laughs! | it's still weird to understand the fact that I'm a person and everyone around me is affected by my presence in their lives SOMEHOW. | happy to live a good life!!! :D
• apr 16. i had a nice time with my friends today, maybe it's all worth it and I have to find pieces of happinesses during the day... | i love being loved and cherished and remembered... it's really sweet to think that maybe people remember me everyday, maybe they want to talk to me everyday, they want to see me succeed and thrive ... :( | i love music?!?!?!!!! listened to a lot of tunes this morning hehehe.
• apr 17. oh today was rough but I am SO happy and here's why: I played with my plants today!!! it was for a while but I got to know them and it was cute. a nice moment for me :") + my mom was really cute to me tonight and I miss her a lot these days, I'm glad she's PRESENT when she's near. + learned a lot in maths tonight??? and did stuff with REAL bacteria this morning. cool! + bought myself a pair of earphones!!! and took the empty 026 bus this morning! what a wonderful find!!! | listened to a bunch of good music in this "your office radio" playlist and it's LIT. | i kinda like having my mom's food for lunch in uni! even if it's cold! | carine bought me chocolate and made me company today :") | said gbye to carlos and I'm gonna miss him lol. | i love plants so much :( they're EVERYTHING to me. i have this huge, humongous LOVE for plants inside my heart I feel like it might blow up any time soon omg. | today I'm thankful for everything.
• apr 18. it's the eighteenth!!!! cute date. | today was filled with happy moments : got to wake up a bit late and got the empty and FAST bus to uni; had a delicious lunch this morning! lorena made me company :") ; music today was good as well, even on the radio!!!; learned a lot more about my tiny planties today! and of course laughed my ass off fjfjfjdjsjs; watched this lecture about climate change and boy was it informative!!! ; got an empty bus on the way home, got to sit, listen to my music, and then when I got home I took a shower and fell asleep? that's the dream day my friend. | today I was thankful for the people around me.
• apr 19. joy williams will you marry me? she's wonderful. her music touches my soul so deeply... | i love understanding a subject??? it's one of the most satisfying feelings. | spent time with the dogs & my plants! | watched mad about you because I missed them. too afraid to finish season seven tho omg.
• apr 20. listening to still feel. and just blasting my brains OUT!!! i honestly love how this song makes me feel!!!! | bought a bunch of chocolate tonite! and also got to buy a new lip balm;;; and it's so pretty I loved every second of this night :") AND I had japanese food for dinner and it was absolutely incredible. i almost passed out??? | this morning I cried because of a tiny bird :-( birds are filled with love and nothing else!!!! they were born to sing and to love!!!! there's nothing or no one purer than birds :")
• apr 21. today i listened to so many gaydies??? and finally found out japanese house's amber is a certified Lesbian!!!! and japanese breakfast is the sweetest soul there is. soft songs from another planet is everything good in the world and i'm glad it's a woman's work. | i am strong and no test is going to prove any different. i'm trying my best and everything will be okay in the end. hang in there kind soul, you WILL be rewarded somehow!!!!
• apr 22. i love my friends, all of my friends. | i caught myself smiling like a fool with the plants at the herbarium this morning. i've never seen it before. | it's the 22th! ah não há rosas sem espinhos, não no canteiro de jesus... went to the mass and i cried a LOT. every part of it made my heart ACHE with love. whenever I saw her I felt complete. thank you Rita, I love you immensely. | had good fude! and my dad picked me up today :D | today was a good day, even though I didn't do as expected on the test: I'm not going to worry about things I can't control anymore. it's passed. it's in the past. now I let it go so I can embrace new experiences. this is what life is all about. there's no pause button!!! keep going bitch •°~~
• apr 23. oh today was a good fude day! | it was also an I love women day. god fucking damn it girls are fucking PERFECT I can't see a flaw in my friends??? they are literally wonderful and I feel so good next to them. gi, for example, when I saw her this morning she called me princess??? because of my outfit (I looked good lol)???!!!!:") | i not only love women but I love plants as well. everything I do with them is rewarding somehow. everything I do is FOR them. I'm gonna save these tiny and big babies from mankind. | today was really cozy. i felt safe and loved and cherished. i love feeling like this. hoping more days like these will come soon.
• apr 24. i feel cute wearing whatever the fuck I want. I'm just popping on these big ass pants and then I'm just going out and looking FRESH and I looked so fine today! don't give a shit if I'm getting weird looks. if I look good, I wear it. bam! | laughing makes my skin look so pretty. i spent the entire day at uni and my skin looks beautiful??? damn this is insane . it's insane how happiness determines everything within yourself. wow. | i had fun today, I'm always having fun on wednesdays. thank you lorena and carol. u guys make my weds better :") | the moon looked so pretty and so big tonight... she's been hiding for a while and maybe it's because I haven't paid any attention but really. beautiful. i miss her and I hope she guides me to the right path.
• apr 25. i had great food today! and great talks... i love my friends. | i was thinking how weird today was. idk maybe I'm just overlooking but it was weird. it felt like a first year day? i don't know maybe I'm just tired. kinda miss those days. sometimes it's good to look back. | "search for the good in every adversity" :")
• apr 26. zoo class was so fun! we met squids and octopuses :") | renata's words mean the world to me. she's the angel I need and don't deserve. i love her more than anything in the world. | talking to my lab friends!!! i love them also.
• apr 27. the fucking cutie! my dad brought me my meds early in the morning when he was leaving for work. i was like "whattt what is this" "it's ur meds drink them. bye" :') | hh I laughed so much with the office's third season today,, I honestly love this show so much. | listened to a great number of sweet tunes! thank you spotify hehehe
• apr 28. hmmm so I studied a bit today? but honestly just spent the entire day slacking off ! it was chilly so I took the time to watch stuff (jk it was only the office.) and organize my bujo!!! I'm happie I got to do this. i even watched twice and bp's cbs,!!! and EVEN answered renata on tumblr omg.. talk about being a productive friend.
• apr 29. uhh I love my course colleagues??? maybe they are the angels I need in my life. | botanics is fucking BEAUTIFUL!!! | had good food and only paid 5$ ... in other words I am GLAD. | came home early today!!! it was weird but nice? it's the once in a lifetime feel omg.
• apr 30. uhhh I love helping people? | had great lunch and great dinner! | laughed so much today my throat felt like it was gonna explode oh my god. anyways I love my classmates :( | I love aoa!!!! and my twice girlies!!! they make life lighter.