• My boss yells at me all the time.
  • reframe: It's great he cares enough to tell you how he feels. He could have just fired you.
• I had to pay $4,000 more in income tax this year than last year.
  • reframe: That's great. You must have made a lot more money this year than last year.
• We have little or no extra money to buy Christmas presents this year.
  • reframe: Great! Then you can become much more ingenious and make something people will never forget instead of buying run-of-the-mill gifts. Your gifts will be personal.
• Every time I begin to succeed in a big way, I sabotage my success.
  • It's great that you're so aware of what your pattern has been in the past.
• Identify the pattern or behavior you wish to change.
• Establish communication with the part of your unconscious mind that
• Separate intention from behavior.
• Create alternative behaviors to satisfy intention.
• Have part X accept the new choices and the responsibility for
• Make an ecological check.

Go inside and ask if there are any parts that object to the negotiations that have just taken place or if all parts agree to support you. Then step into the future and imagine a situation that would have triggered the old behavior, and experience using one of your new choices and still achieving the benefits you desire. If you get a signal that other parts object to these new choices, you must start at the beginning, identify which part is objecting, what benefits it's been giving you in the past, and have it work with part X to generate new choices that would maintain the benefits it's always given you and also provide for you a new set of choices.

• potential, possibility
• dark cloud in every single silver lining

ANCHORING

• One of the things that affects the power of an anchor is the intensity of the original state. Sometimes people have such an intense unpleasant experience-like fighting with their spouse or boss-that from then on, whenever they see that

person's face, they immediately feel anger inside-and from that point on their relationship or job loses all its joy. There are two simple steps to consciously create a positive anchor for yourself or others. First you must put yourself, or the person you're anchoring, into the specific state you wish to anchor. Then you must consistently provide a specific, unique stimulus as the person experiences the peak of that state.

• Another way to create a positive anchor-let's say a confidence anchor-is to ask that person to remember a time when (s)he felt the state (s)he wishes to have available on cue, then have that person step back into that experience so that (s)he is fully associated and can feel those feelings in the body. As the person does this, you will begin to see changes in physiology-facial expressions, posture,

breathing. As you see these states nearing their peak, quickly provide a specific and unique stimulus several times.

• KEYS TO ANCHORING:
• INTENSITY OF THE STATE
• TIMING (PEAK OF EXPERIENCE)
• UNIQUENESS OF STIMULUS
• REPLICATION OF STIMULUS

three to five states

• THE ABILITY TO ELATE FROM YOUR OWN

ENVIRONMENT TRIGGERS THAT TEND TO PUT YOU IN NEGATIVE OR UNRESOURCEFUL STATES, WHILE INSTALLING POSITIVE ONES IN YOURSELF AND IN OTHERS.

• There are many ANCHORING exercises on the tape, including:
• Select three to five states or feelings that you would like to have at your fingertips, then
• Continue STACKING ANCHORS on your fist.
• Anchor three different people in positive states-have them remember a time when they were
• COLLAPSE UNRESOURCEFUL ANCHORS. Listen to the part of the tape when I have

you put the resource states in one hand, and the unresourceful state in the other hand. 1 LOVE14 ECSTASY MUTUAL COMMUNICATION2 RESPECT8 FUN4 GROWTH6 SUPPORT13 CHALLENGE11 CREATIVITY12 BEAUTY5 ATTRACTION2 SPIRITUAL UNITY10 FREEDOM9 HONESTY

• #1: HOW TO HANDLE FRUSTRATION
  • Solution tool: (ANCHORING, COLLAPSING ANCHORS, REFRAMING,

ETC.)

• #2: HOW TO HANDLE REJECTION
• #3: YOU MUST LEARN TO HANDLE FINANCIAL PRESSURE
• #4: HOW TO HANDLE COMPLACENCY
• #5: ALWAYS GIVE MORE THAN YOU EXPECT TO RECEIVE
• WHERE IN MY LIFE IS THERE AN OPPORTUNITY TO GIVE that would improve the quality of life for me and the people I care about?
• Solution tool: Ask yourself "What, specifically, could I give that I am not

currently giving that I could afford-either financially or emotionally-to give that would EMPOWER that relationship?"