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- the self-image - certain processes within the subconscious mind; has complete control over an individual's ability to achieve (or fail to achieve) any goal
- top techniques for managing & improving the self-image = visualization, mental rehearsal, and relaxation
- psycho-cybernetics is effective because it isn't just philosophical musings about success; rather, it is scientific & logical, as it provides practical things to do (not just think about) that yield quantifiable results
- "nothing splendid has ever been achieved except by those who dared believe that something inside them was superior to circumstance" - bruce barton
- new methods from psycho-cybernetics have shown to result in dramatic changes in personality, in health, and even in basic abilities & talents; chronic failures became successful; shy, retiring, inhibited personalities became happy & outgoing, well-adjusted
- understanding the psychology of the self can mean the difference between success & failure, love & hate, bitterness & happiness. the discovery of the real self can rescue a crumbling marriage, recreate a failing career, transform victims of "personality failure." on another plane, discovering your real self means the difference between freedom & the compulsions of conformity
- by understanding your self-image & by learning to modify it and manage it to suit your purposes, you gain incredible confidence & power
- each of us carries within us a mental blueprint or picture of ourselves... this self-image is our own conception of "the sort of person i am." ...specifically, all your actions, feelings, behavior, even your abilities, are always consistent with this self-image. note the word: always. in short, you will "act like" the sort of person you conceive yourself to be. more important, you literally cannot act otherwise, in spite of all your conscious efforts or willpower. this is why trying to achieve something difficult through willpower alone is a losing battle. willpower is not the answer. self-image management is.
- the self-image then controls what you can & cannot accomplish, what is difficult or easy for you, even how others respond to you just as certainly and scientifically as a thermostat controls the temperature in your home
- you cannot long outperform or outrun or escape your self-image... the person who perceives himself to be a failure will find some way to fail, in spite of all his good intentions or his willpower, even if opportunity is literally dumped in his lap. the person who conceives himself to be a victim of injustice, one who "was meant to suffer," will invariably find circumstances to verify his opinions
- whatever is difficult for you, whatever frustrations you have in your life, they are likely "proving" and reinforcing something ingrained in your self-image like a groove in a record
- our trouble lies in our self-image or our own evaluation of ourselves... it is based on certain ingrained, possibly hidden patterns of thought that, if altered, will free you to tap more of your potential and experience vastly different results
- the circumference of the self
- jesus warned about the folly of putting a patch of new material on an old garment or of putting new wine into old bottles. "positive thinking" cannot be used effectively as a patch to the same old self-image.
- once the concept of self is changed, other things consistent with the new concept of self are accomplished easily & without strain
- the personality = a system of ideas, all of which must be consistent with each other. ideas that are inconsistent w/ the system are rejected, "not believed," and not acted on. ideas that seem to be consistent w/ the system are accepted. at the very center of this system of ideas -- the keystone, or the base on which all else is built -- is the individual's self-image, or his conception of himself
- the trouble with the student was not that they were dumb or lacking in basic aptitudes. the trouble was an inadequate self-image ("i don't have a mathematical mind"; "i'm just a naturally poor speller"). they "identified" with their mistakes & failures. instead of saying "i failed that test" (factual & descriptive), they concluded "i am a failure." instead of saying "i flunked that subject," they said "i am a flunk/failure."
- 'self-consistency: a theory'
- he was ashamed of himself & felt that his appearance must be repulsive to others. his scar became an obsession for him; he thought himself as "different" from other people; he began to wonder (then obsess) as to what others were thinking of him. soon his self-image was even more mutilated than his face. he lost confidence in himself. he became bitter & hostile. soon almost all of his attention was directed inwards at himself, and his primary goal became the protection of his ego & the avoidance of situations that might bring humiliation...
- what about the exceptions, those who didn't change? ...although surgery corrected her disfigurement and left her beautiful, she continued to act the part of the ugly duckling, the unwanted sister who could never bring herself to look another human being in the eye... what about all of the others who acquired new faces but went on wearing the same old personalities? ...no matter how drastic the change in appearance may be, certain patients will insist that "i look just the same as before -- you didn't do a thing" -- the patients see only slight or zero improvement, or in fact deny that change at all has been made. comparison of before/after photos does little good. by some strange mental alchemy the patient will rationalize: "the scar may not show any more, but it's still there."
- "not all scars or disfigurements bring shame & humiliation"
- discovery of the self-image is the common denominator, the determining factor, in all our case histories, the failures as well as the successes
- the secret is this: to really live, that is to find life reasonably satisfying, you must have an adequate & realistic self-image that you can live with. you must find yourself acceptable to you. you must have a wholesome self-esteem. you must have a self that you can trust & believe in. you must have a self that you are not ashamed to be, one that you can feel free to express creatively, rather than hide or cover up. you must know yourself -- both your strengths & your weaknesses -- and be honest with yourself concerning both. your self-image must be a reasonable approximation of "you" - being neither more nor less than you are.
- when a facial disfigurement is corrected by plastic surgery, dramatic psychologic changes result only if there is a corresponding correction of the mutilated self-image. sometimes the image of the disfigured self persists even after successful surgery, much the same as the "phantom limb" may continue to feel pain years after the physical arm or leg has been amputated
- a continuing process of pointed observation
may 3 2020 ∞
nov 10 2023 +
nov 10 2023 +