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༉‧₊˚✧ ... fruitier than a fruit salad . . .

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its words
  • 01. I remember I was having wild mood swings & was even suicidal, stole a blade
  • 02. stable, good day. packed to go home, brought all my stuff up to my flat with the help of my mom, drove to get groceries at Lidl, fogot about cat food, so had to go to the store to get it, which was OK, because I also got my coffee. unpacked with moderate back pain. watched WandaVision (of course), chatted with friends
  • 03. watched WandaVision, listened to my new W+V playlist, painted nails, took a diazepam from anxiety (my last one), ate salmon, decided to prasctise more the PLEASE skills of DBT, Spotify, INTENSE anxiety, messaged my FP, panic attack, insomnia and sleepinesss, tried to fall asleep/take naps, but failed
  • 04. indiviudal therapy, which did not start so well, but ended okay, felt less anxious than before about DBT, successful first (well, my second first) DBT sessionprocrastinated from translating the cartoon, but ended up finishing it in 6-7 hours
  • 05. threw up acid again, intense, intense, anxiety, horrible sleep, saw my psychiatrist, got prescribed tileptal (totally new) and truxal on top of my vraylar, almost got xanax, but she saw I'd already been prescribed diazepam
  • 06. tried to finish the bread that was left (it was super rock hard) and I almost cut off my finger, had to throw some of it away, upset and Shannon, learnt what potency means in pharmacology
  • 07. started reading (skimmed through) a book of pharmacology and apprently got very invested, made a Wanda meme, watched B99 and was not sure if I should rewatch Wanda today & then 2 mins later Jake says "This is my co-pilot Wanda Cohen". IT WAS A SIGN!! ate noodles, VPN, decided to change my sleep schedule
  • 08. started rewatching Free Guy, sister visited, we ordered and ate McDonalds and continued watching Free Guy. tried to get Disney+ for literal 2 hours, ended up getting it, watched Wimpy Kid 2 parts with sister. started Hawkeye.
  • 09. finished Hawkeye, said goodbye to sister, started coloring in the new coloring books, watched WandaVision, but skipped the last 2 epsiodes because I was already upset about something, mood changed (what a surprise lmao), chain listened to Daydream Believer and mentally time travelled back to when WandaVision wasn't out yet (first ep aired 15.01.21). waited for Golden Globes, chatted in discord.
  • 10. went to bed only at around 4-5AM, because I was waiting for the results of who got the Golden Globes, was disappointed in nearly every category. I was rooting for Elizabeth Olsen, Lady Gaga and Don't Look Up. chain listened to Daydream Believer, made tortolloni, pretyy much avoided everything and procrastinated, spent a lot of my time on Discord, drank a gin&tonic.
  • 11. had intense anxiety because of DBT group, so like 40 mins before I took 25 mg truxal, which made me super sleepy, so after DBT I napped for 2 hours. ordered groceries and made some dinner (pancakes filled with ham and cheese). felt very hyopmanic after that.
  • 12. had to increase my dose of trileptal, waited for mitski to release hew new song, which I loved, watched Adele's new video of Oh My God, talked to grandma on the phone, fought with Shannon, decided to charge my old phone for Finch
  • 13. overslept therapy and it was bleh this week, rated lorde's and mitski's albums on rateyourmusic, was triggered and decided to buy a cheap bottle of wine, which didn't even get me drunk
  • 14. sister came to visit, we watched Encanto and then the last NORMAL Diary of a Wimpy Kid part, WV servers got raided, ours stayed safe
  • 15. ordered pizzas with sister, said goodbye, pretened to watch the first 2 episodes of WandaVision for the first time on the WV server
  • 16. moved to the study room, managed to turn on my old PC, but the WIFI did not work on it, watched Killing Eve from my USB, drank 2 bottles of gin & tonic, which at first made me feel better, procrastinated the whole day (lazy Sunday), started downloading Parks & Rec
  • 17. big wind storm, aggravated with Shannon, felt so good as if I'd taken something, learnt more interesting things about mindfulness
  • 18. full moon, became manic (I'm a warewolf) AND psychotic, forgot about sleep, cooked pasta with cheese, started getting OGC, went to bed at 7AM, felt much better when I woke up, went to buy gin & tonic, finished reading "You", watched WandaVision and Parks and Rec, cooked nuggets at nearly midnight
  • 19. barely slept, tried to nap, but did not fully fall asleep, plus I had terrible anxiety. saw my psychiatrist, it went well. went to get meds at the pharmacy, made an appointment with my GP, went to buy Šarlote, then went home, drank almost all the bottle, but did not feel that good, had a headache (a mild one), so I went to bed super early (for once lmao).
jan 2 2022 ∞
dec 2 2022 +